Author Topic: Home Sales Party....how to say no gracefully?  (Read 4546 times)

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GrammarNerd

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Home Sales Party....how to say no gracefully?
« on: March 25, 2013, 01:56:37 PM »
An old friend of mine has gotten into the home sales party thing with a clothing line.  She seems to be having a good time with it, and I'm happy for her.  However, I don't want to get into this, b/c and I'd just prefer to go to a regular store and try clothes on before I buy them, KWIM?  And  even more importantly, IMO the clothes are pretty expensive.

So the friend is probably following the usual MO of home sales companies and she's contacting friends and family and to invite them to sales parties.  Via FB, she asked for my regular email so she can send me notices of her sales.  (She already does post some stuff on FB that is more 'businessy' than personal--thinly veiled I-love-my-new-business stuff--but at least it's not *too* much.)

I don't mind her having my regular email address.  But I don't want to get sales emails, and I'd like to discourage future party invites without being mean.  Does anyone have any suggestions for how to sound positive about her new business, but discourage her from using me for it?

So far, I thought of this:  "Thanks for the invite.  I'm glad you're enjoying your new venture, but I really don't think it's my thing (and it seems like the prices are more than I want to spend).  My regular email address is myaddress@something.com if you need it for anything, but please keep me off of your sales emails and don't share my address with your parent company; I don't need any more of those types of emails, if you know what I mean!  I hope it all continues to go well for you."

Does that sound OK?  Any other suggestions? 

ETA: I did the home sales party/consultant thing several years ago with a craft company, so I'm familiar with the 'contact everyone you know and share these wonderful products and this wonderful opportunity!' mentality that most of them use.  I became a consultant b/c I just wanted the discount on the products.  Any other orders I could get were just a bonus, but I didn't really host the sales parties myself.  I liked the creativity, not the selling.
« Last Edit: March 25, 2013, 02:02:20 PM by GrammarNerd »

Judah

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Re: Home Sales Party....how to say no gracefully?
« Reply #1 on: March 25, 2013, 02:01:41 PM »
Quote
"Thanks for the invite.  I'm glad you're enjoying your new venture, but I really don't think it's I don't do home sales parties.  My regular email address is myaddress@something.com if you need it for anything, but please keep me off of your sales emails and don't share my address with your parent company; I don't need any more of those types of emails, if you know what I mean!  I hope it all continues to go well for you."

It sounds fine. I made a small modification just to make it less ambiguous. I don't do home sales parties ever. I dislike them more than anything else on the planet. And that's only a mild over-statement.
Ask for what you want. Let's be clear on this one:
Subtle hints don't work.
Strong hints don't work.
Really obvious hints don't work.
Just say it!

-The Car Talk Guys

TurtleDove

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Re: Home Sales Party....how to say no gracefully?
« Reply #2 on: March 25, 2013, 02:02:27 PM »
I think that is a great approach, although I would not even provide my email to her if I were you.

Shoo

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Re: Home Sales Party....how to say no gracefully?
« Reply #3 on: March 25, 2013, 02:02:31 PM »
I suggest you be much more firm.  Part of the training they receive is how NOT to take no for an answer.

"Friend, I am not interested in hosting or attending your sales parties, but I wish you a lot of luck with them.  It looks like you're having a good time with it.  But I don't want to receive any emails, so no thank you."

Repeat often, because it WILL be necessary.

MrTango

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Re: Home Sales Party....how to say no gracefully?
« Reply #4 on: March 25, 2013, 02:02:37 PM »
You could just respond:
"Facebook is the best way to get ahold of me. Thanks."

White Lotus

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Re: Home Sales Party....how to say no gracefully?
« Reply #5 on: March 25, 2013, 02:03:41 PM »
Don't do it!  You will regret it!  She will not keep it private and personal.  She just won't. Tell her she can contact you via FB -- you don't use regular email much any more.  Many people are doing this now.  Also, some people, and I am one of them, have a specific shopping email address.  Which I only check when I want order and shipping confirmations and receipts and that people can spam all day and all night without bothering me.  Because they will.  I also have Fantasy Phone Number.  I never give out a real one.

PastryGoddess

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Re: Home Sales Party....how to say no gracefully?
« Reply #6 on: March 25, 2013, 02:12:58 PM »
I dabbled in the home sales industry.  Your email will go into a database and even if she doesn't send you emails personally, the company can and will send emails on her behalf.

I suggest you not offer her your email address or only have an address that is used for spam.

WillyNilly

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Re: Home Sales Party....how to say no gracefully?
« Reply #7 on: March 25, 2013, 02:28:15 PM »
"Thanks for the invite.  I'm glad you're enjoying your new venture, but I really don't think it's not my thing (and it seems like the prices are more than I want to spend).  My regular email address is myaddress@something.com if you need it for anything, but please keep me off of your sales emails and don't share my address with your parent company;I'll check out your sales posts on Facebook but I don't need any more of those types of emails, if you know what I mean!  I hope it all continues to go well for you."

^ Is what I suggest.

TootsNYC

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Re: Home Sales Party....how to say no gracefully?
« Reply #8 on: March 25, 2013, 03:37:16 PM »
Don't do it!  You will regret it!  She will not keep it private and personal.  She just won't. Tell her she can contact you via FB -- you don't use regular email much any more.  Many people are doing this now.  Also, some people, and I am one of them, have a specific shopping email address.  Which I only check when I want order and shipping confirmations and receipts and that people can spam all day and all night without bothering me.  Because they will.  I also have Fantasy Phone Number.  I never give out a real one.

I agree.

Or, just don't respond. Let it die out.

Judah

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Re: Home Sales Party....how to say no gracefully?
« Reply #9 on: March 25, 2013, 03:38:52 PM »
"Thanks for the invite.  I'm glad you're enjoying your new venture, but I really don't think it's not my thing (and it seems like the prices are more than I want to spend).  My regular email address is myaddress@something.com if you need it for anything, but please keep me off of your sales emails and don't share my address with your parent company;I'll check out your sales posts on Facebook but I don't need any more of those types of emails, if you know what I mean!  I hope it all continues to go well for you."

^ Is what I suggest.

I want to change my response to this.^^^
Ask for what you want. Let's be clear on this one:
Subtle hints don't work.
Strong hints don't work.
Really obvious hints don't work.
Just say it!

-The Car Talk Guys

Eden

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Re: Home Sales Party....how to say no gracefully?
« Reply #10 on: March 25, 2013, 03:46:51 PM »
"Thanks for the invite.  I'm glad you're enjoying your new venture, but I really don't think it's not my thing (and it seems like the prices are more than I want to spend).  My regular email address is myaddress@something.com if you need it for anything, but please keep me off of your sales emails and don't share my address with your parent company;I'll check out your sales posts on Facebook but I don't need any more of those types of emails, if you know what I mean!  I hope it all continues to go well for you."

^ Is what I suggest.

I like this.

I had a major falling out with a friend over one of these. Be prepared for her to try multiple approaches to get you to agree.

Knitterly

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Re: Home Sales Party....how to say no gracefully?
« Reply #11 on: March 25, 2013, 08:02:54 PM »
"Thanks for the invite.  I'm glad you're enjoying your new venture, but I really don't think it's not my thing (and it seems like the prices are more than I want to spend).  My regular email address is myaddress@something.com if you need it for anything, but please keep me off of your sales emails and don't share my address with your parent company;I'll check out your sales posts on Facebook but I don't need any more of those types of emails, if you know what I mean!  I hope it all continues to go well for you."

^ Is what I suggest.

I like this.

I had a major falling out with a friend over one of these. Be prepared for her to try multiple approaches to get you to agree.

I agree with the bolded.  A friend of mine has two home party businesses.  Both are products I like, so she is constantly badgering me to hold a party for her.  The thing is, I have.  I just can't hold one every month.  Heck, every 6 months is really, really pushing it.  And I don't like feeling like I'm using my friends for their money (I hold a draw at the end of the night for the hostess benefits - I'll hold a shopping party, but I draw the line at using my friends for gain).  She gets very pushy.  The more I say no, the more she pushes.

When I finally did host a party, she wanted the names and numbers of my guests.  I wouldn't give them to her.  So she badgered me to call them and remind them or invite them personally.  And I didn't.  They got an invite.  If they didn't want to come, they didn't have to.  And when only 6 friends came out (only!  ha!  6 is a big party in my house), she said it was because I didn't push hard enough.  Thanks, but I don't want my friends to feel forced to hang out with me and spend money they may not have in their budgets.  Talk about a really quick way to lose friends!

I think the phrasing GrammarNerd suggested is great.  Blunt, but sometimes bluntness is needed.

SamiHami

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Re: Home Sales Party....how to say no gracefully?
« Reply #12 on: March 25, 2013, 08:23:57 PM »
And this is exactly why these home shopping "parties" are inherently rude. These home party businesses try to take advantage of one's friendships because they know that a certain percentage will buy something just because soandso is selling it. Then the endless badgering to have "parties" of your own, to give out other people's personal information...just no.

Anytime I am invited to one of these events, I plainly tell the inviter that I don't participate in shopping parties, but if they'd like to get together sometime just to socialize/have lunch/go to a movie/whatever that'd be great.

What have you got? Is it food? Is it for me? I want it whatever it is!

peaches

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Re: Home Sales Party....how to say no gracefully?
« Reply #13 on: March 25, 2013, 08:46:29 PM »
I suggest you be much more firm.  Part of the training they receive is how NOT to take no for an answer.

"Friend, I am not interested in hosting or attending your sales parties, but I wish you a lot of luck with them.  It looks like you're having a good time with it.  But I don't want to receive any emails, so no thank you."

Repeat often, because it WILL be necessary.

POD

I wouldn't say anything about the prices being too high. This invites a response about how there are great sales, and she'll be happy to keep you apprised of them!

gramma dishes

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Re: Home Sales Party....how to say no gracefully?
« Reply #14 on: March 25, 2013, 10:26:28 PM »

...   When I finally did host a party, she wanted the names and numbers of my guests.  I wouldn't give them to her.  So she badgered me to call them and remind them or invite them personally.  And I didn't.  They got an invite.  If they didn't want to come, they didn't have to.  And when only 6 friends came out (only!  ha!  6 is a big party in my house), she said it was because I didn't push hard enough.  Thanks, but I don't want my friends to feel forced to hang out with me and spend money they may not have in their budgets.  Talk about a really quick way to lose friends!   ...


Quite frankly, being pushed to have parties, being criticized for not pushing my invitees to attend, etc. would make me want to definitely cool the friendship with the friend who was demanding that I "do" parties for her business.  That would be enough to stop that friendship cold in its tracks.  Forever.