Author Topic: Cheapskate stories  (Read 221919 times)

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rose red

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Re: Cheapskate stories
« Reply #60 on: April 01, 2013, 09:55:14 AM »
We don't really "do" Easter at our house, but MIL came over with a giant wrapped basket for Babybartfast and Bittybartfast earlier this week so I figured it wouldn't hurt to open it up today.  I think she said it was from her MIL (DH's grandmother).  It was a beautiful basket, stuffed to the brim . . . with ratty, nasty, cheap stuffed animals.  I think she bought a small commercial basket with (cheap) candy in it, then added a bunch of stuffed rabbits and ducks she found at thrift stores or that people left behind at her rental properties and repackaged the whole thing into a bigger basket.  Several were grungy and one of them stank of cigarette smoke.

Babybartfast got to keep the candy (which was wrapped, thank goodness) and one cheap-but-new-looking toy, and the rest are going straight back to Goodwill.

Playing devil's advocate here. If most of the stuffed toys were in very bad shape (not to mention smelly), does Goodwill want them? IIRC they end up throwing away a lot of donations due to conditions like this. Honestly, I'd just toss them.

I agree.  Why subject another child to germs or second-hand smoke?  Goodwill may throw them out anyway and it may cost them money depending on how much stuff they need to toss each week.

SiotehCat

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Re: Cheapskate stories
« Reply #61 on: April 01, 2013, 10:01:18 AM »
We don't really "do" Easter at our house, but MIL came over with a giant wrapped basket for Babybartfast and Bittybartfast earlier this week so I figured it wouldn't hurt to open it up today.  I think she said it was from her MIL (DH's grandmother).  It was a beautiful basket, stuffed to the brim . . . with ratty, nasty, cheap stuffed animals.  I think she bought a small commercial basket with (cheap) candy in it, then added a bunch of stuffed rabbits and ducks she found at thrift stores or that people left behind at her rental properties and repackaged the whole thing into a bigger basket.  Several were grungy and one of them stank of cigarette smoke.

Babybartfast got to keep the candy (which was wrapped, thank goodness) and one cheap-but-new-looking toy, and the rest are going straight back to Goodwill.

Playing devil's advocate here. If most of the stuffed toys were in very bad shape (not to mention smelly), does Goodwill want them? IIRC they end up throwing away a lot of donations due to conditions like this. Honestly, I'd just toss them.

I agree.  Why subject another child to germs or second-hand smoke?  Goodwill may throw them out anyway and it may cost them money depending on how much stuff they need to toss each week.

On Post #47, Slartibartfast said she was going to toss the gross ones.

Babybartfast got to keep the candy (which was wrapped, thank goodness) and one cheap-but-new-looking toy, and the rest are going straight back to Goodwill.

I think you should reconsider going to Goodwill and trash the ratty, smelly toys.

The smoky one and the particularly grungy ones are getting trashed, don't worry  :)  Most of the rest of the stuff in the basket is going to Goodwill just because I don't need it in the house - some of it was new still-wrapped things like cardboard easter-themed puzzles (it's not like we need more puzzle pieces in the house) and most of it was not appropriate for a nine-month-old baby to get her hands on.  I'll freely admit I'm extra-picky about secondhand stuffed animals - I don't mind grunge when it's our grunge, know what I mean?

weeblewobble

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Re: Cheapskate stories
« Reply #62 on: April 01, 2013, 10:08:33 AM »
My X was a cheapskate. That's one reason he's an X! He wouldn't spend money on pest control, and we lived in Florida, so we had a roach problem (we were clean - roaches are a fact of life there). I finally had enough, and he grudgingly gave in.

He could also be cruel with his cheapness. One time I was out antiquing with my mom and sister - we were on vacation. I spent $25 on a pretty Victorian bowl. He was very upset with me. His words: "I was going to buy you something, but since you spent that money, now I'm not." Just one more nail in the coffin.

FTR, he's made well into 6-figures for almost 30 yrs.

I don't blame you.  I wouldn't have been able to live with someone who believed he alone controlled the purse strings.  (Really?  He set aside money for a treat for you?  Like an allowance?  You got no input?  Jerk.) 

My DH has always handled our family finances, but due to some changes in my career path over the last few years, I consistently earn more than he does.  Our lifestyle hasn't changed much.  We drive the same cars and live in the same house, just without debt.  I don't go out on spending sprees.  But in the last few months, I have dropped a considerable amount of weight.  So I went shopping for a new spring wardrobe and shoes, after budgeting with DH for the expense.  (Seriously, the most fun shopping I've ever had.) Some friend of DH saw me out at the mall, weighed down with multiple shopping bags and immediately called DH to "tattle" on me.

"I just thought you should know you're wife is out here spending your paycheck on shoes," he told DH.

"I don't see how this is any of your business," said DH. 

This friend, of course, is a notorious cheapskate, who flips out anytime his wife makes a purchase he doesn't approve of.

(Have I mentioned DH is awesome?)

jaxsue

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Re: Cheapskate stories
« Reply #63 on: April 01, 2013, 10:10:37 AM »
Siotecat, We were responding to the OP about the stuffed animals:

Babybartfast got to keep the candy (which was wrapped, thank goodness) and one cheap-but-new-looking toy, and the rest are going straight back to Goodwill.


It seems the story changed after the comments, but I'll give her credit if she tosses the worst toys.

jaxsue

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Re: Cheapskate stories
« Reply #64 on: April 01, 2013, 10:13:05 AM »
My X was a cheapskate. That's one reason he's an X! He wouldn't spend money on pest control, and we lived in Florida, so we had a roach problem (we were clean - roaches are a fact of life there). I finally had enough, and he grudgingly gave in.

He could also be cruel with his cheapness. One time I was out antiquing with my mom and sister - we were on vacation. I spent $25 on a pretty Victorian bowl. He was very upset with me. His words: "I was going to buy you something, but since you spent that money, now I'm not." Just one more nail in the coffin.

FTR, he's made well into 6-figures for almost 30 yrs.

I don't blame you.  I wouldn't have been able to live with someone who believed he alone controlled the purse strings.  (Really?  He set aside money for a treat for you?  Like an allowance?  You got no input?  Jerk.) 

My DH has always handled our family finances, but due to some changes in my career path over the last few years, I consistently earn more than he does.  Our lifestyle hasn't changed much.  We drive the same cars and live in the same house, just without debt.  I don't go out on spending sprees.  But in the last few months, I have dropped a considerable amount of weight.  So I went shopping for a new spring wardrobe and shoes, after budgeting with DH for the expense.  (Seriously, the most fun shopping I've ever had.) Some friend of DH saw me out at the mall, weighed down with multiple shopping bags and immediately called DH to "tattle" on me.

"I just thought you should know you're wife is out here spending your paycheck on shoes," he told DH.

"I don't see how this is any of your business," said DH. 

This friend, of course, is a notorious cheapskate, who flips out anytime his wife makes a purchase he doesn't approve of.

(Have I mentioned DH is awesome?)

For years I thought I was the problem. I wasn't a good enough wife or person. I know ehell isn't a therapy session, and I apologize for going off-topic a bit. I finally saw the abuse for what it was.

As for your DH's friend...sheesh...what a piece of work! Your DH rocks.  :)

rose red

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Re: Cheapskate stories
« Reply #65 on: April 01, 2013, 10:17:44 AM »
"I just thought you should know you're wife is out here spending your paycheck on shoes," he told DH.

This friend, of course, is a notorious cheapskate, who flips out anytime his wife makes a purchase he doesn't approve of.

Does his wife work or is it a case of "No wife of mine will ever work" so the can control the purse strings?  I bet he longs for the days when all women have no say.

fountainsoflettuce

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Re: Cheapskate stories
« Reply #66 on: April 01, 2013, 10:19:00 AM »
Even if she tosses the worst toys, isn't she just like her MIL when she gives the rest of the ratty toys to Goodwill?   Really, why not just throw all of them out?   A person doesn't need to donate brand new items to Goodwill, just those in good condition.  To me, "good condition" is defined as "the same condition I would accept for used goods in my home." 

Sorry for the tangent - to get back on track:  I don't mind some of the used toys my MIL picks up for the grandkids.  Most are in really good condition and easy to clean.  I do not accepted used stuffed toys b/c I can't get them clean enough for my standards.  I did object to the used car seat.  I don't think she was really a cheapskate but frugal - why spend lots of money that will be used for a short time. 

siamesecat2965

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Re: Cheapskate stories
« Reply #67 on: April 01, 2013, 10:41:30 AM »
I hereby nominate my friend's DH. I posted about him and his tantrum to my mechanic, who I had recommended to him, recently.  Some other examples of his cheapness include:

Wearing his undies even though they are holey and stained;
Only getting a haircut when he has a coupon, and said haircut WIHTOUT is $10
Has a coniption if she or their son need to go to the dr., since their copay is $30. HE never goes, and HIS parents don't even have health insurance, so he doesnt get the need for it 
He also had a fit when she bought their son his first pair of shoes, saying the $30 or $40 was unnecesasry, that she could yave gotten cheaper ones at Walmart.

He is beyond cheap, irrationally and obessively so. He refused to entertain the notion of buying a new car until they could pay cash. NO ifs, ands, or buts. Which is his choice, but by doing that, chose to pour $$ into an old car that eventually died (which was the subject of his childish tirade), because he REFUSED to have anything to do with a car loan.  Nevermind they HAD the $$ to buy one, but as it would have drained most of their savings, he refused. And now is going around saying "we should have gotten rid of it a long time ago" yes due to his stubborness and cheap ways, he didn.t

He also doesn't know very much either; he is convinced that the mechanic caused their elderly car's transmission to fail, simply by replacing the starter the day before. and nothing you say to him will convince him that is not the case. nevermind the car was pushing 14, and already had a replacement tranny. Oh no. in his mind, since the mechanic was the last to touch it, it was HIS fault.

Luci

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Re: Cheapskate stories
« Reply #68 on: April 01, 2013, 10:47:17 AM »
For years I thought I was the problem. I wasn't a good enough wife or person. I know ehell isn't a therapy session, and I apologize for going off-topic a bit. I finally saw the abuse for what it was.

If it's brief, fits the topic, and might be a gentle warning or quiet encouragement for others, I don't consider it a therapy session - it just happens to have a small bonus.

And it's reasonably priced!

RebeccainGA

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Re: Cheapskate stories
« Reply #69 on: April 01, 2013, 11:00:03 AM »
My grandmother had a 'friend' like this - her ACTUAL friend, Miss Betty, had passed away, and this woman, I'll call her Edna, was attached to Miss Betty like a barnacle. When Miss Betty died, my grandmother inherited Edna. Edna would seem nice - she was always giving out 'homemade jam' to people (we found out later that she would buy commercial vats of jelly or jam at the salvage store and repackage it into canning jars). She gave us Christmas gifts, of course (all of us!) after we chipped in and bought her a couple of cases of canning jars and some nice labels and boxes for them. The gifts ranged from (long expired - 3-4 years old) "Swiss Colony" gift sets of meat and cheese to an old, pilled, faded polyester muumuu.

My grandmother went to her house once. She had tinfoil on all the windows (she said for insulation). She always took every napkin, condiment packet, and plastic container she could get her hands on when my grandmother would take her to lunch on their 'errand day' - when Gran saw the YEARS worth of them piled up in the lady's kitchen, she stopped enabling her to do it. Gran said there were literally enough salt and pepper packets, in big bags, to start a restaurant supply house.

Edna passed away about two years after my grandmother started carting her around. We were told, by her son, that she'd left an estate worth at least six figures, not counting the house and contents. She left it all to charity, as far as we know, except the house. Her kids were furious!

reflection5

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Re: Cheapskate stories
« Reply #70 on: April 01, 2013, 11:08:02 AM »
I hereby nominate my friend's DH. I posted about him and his tantrum to my mechanic, who I had recommended to him, recently.  Some other examples of his cheapness include:

Wearing his undies even though they are holey and stained;
Only getting a haircut when he has a coupon, and said haircut WIHTOUT is $10
Has a coniption if she or their son need to go to the dr., since their copay is $30. HE never goes, and HIS parents don't even have health insurance, so he doesnt get the need for it 
He also had a fit when she bought their son his first pair of shoes, saying the $30 or $40 was unnecesasry, that she could yave gotten cheaper ones at Walmart.

He is beyond cheap, irrationally and obessively so. He refused to entertain the notion of buying a new car until they could pay cash. NO ifs, ands, or buts. Which is his choice, but by doing that, chose to pour $$ into an old car that eventually died (which was the subject of his childish tirade), because he REFUSED to have anything to do with a car loan.  Nevermind they HAD the $$ to buy one, but as it would have drained most of their savings, he refused. And now is going around saying "we should have gotten rid of it a long time ago" yes due to his stubborness and cheap ways, he didn.t

He also doesn't know very much either; he is convinced that the mechanic caused their elderly car's transmission to fail, simply by replacing the starter the day before. and nothing you say to him will convince him that is not the case. nevermind the car was pushing 14, and already had a replacement tranny. Oh no. in his mind, since the mechanic was the last to touch it, it was HIS fault.

Ill fight you for that nomination;

My (ex)BFFs husband (with 6 figure salary):

1) Only showered every other day.
2) Refused to buy deodorant (and got mad at her because she bought some from the dollar store).
3) Used bars of generic brand soap until the slivers were barely visible.
4) Refused to get internet at home, so she had to go to library
5) In the summer only allowed SC to be turned on for 2 hours a day
6) Made her get a job at Burger King (after he retired) even though she got a large inheritance when her mother passed away (which he controlled)

Her defensiveness (of him) contributed to the erosion of relationships with her family and our friendship.

CharlieBraun

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Re: Cheapskate stories
« Reply #71 on: April 01, 2013, 11:26:16 AM »
I'll play.

My friend Chip inherited a duplex house - full apartment on each of two floors.  His dream was to never have a job and live off the rent from one of the apartments while occupying the other.

He lives in upstate NY and refuses to turn on the heat.  He lives on the second floor and said that the lower floor tenant's heat is "enough."  Last I visited him, there was ice on the inside of his windows.

He converted his auto to run on oil.  Vegetable oil.  He used to buy the fryer oil from various restaurants in his town, sequentially.  If you drove behind his car, depending on the day, you might be treated to the odor of egg rolls/dim sum, french fries, or cannoli.
"We ate the pies."

Shalamar

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Re: Cheapskate stories
« Reply #72 on: April 01, 2013, 11:28:48 AM »
Somewhat off-topic, but the discussion of tips reminds me of when I was having dinner at a diner with my two daughters, who were pretty young at the time (8 and 6).  My 6-year-old got a bit bored waiting for us to finish our meal, and she started playing with some pennies that she had in her pocket.  Just as we were about to leave the table, she dropped the pennies in her water glass, where they sank to the bottom.  I didn't think anything of it and went to pay.  I added a 20% tip for our waitress at the cash register, and we left.  On our way to the car, I suddenly remembered that a favorite passive-aggressive trick of people who thought they got lousy service was to leave several pennies in their water glass, and I thought with horror "Oh  no - she's going to think that's her tip!"  I ran back with the girls in tow, and sure enough, the poor waitress was staring in dismay at the five lonely pennies sitting at the bottom of the glass.   I said "I'm so sorry - my daughter was playing with those - that's not your tip!  I left the real one at the cash register!"  She was very relieved.  :)

Slartibartfast

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Re: Cheapskate stories
« Reply #73 on: April 01, 2013, 11:30:53 AM »
Even if she tosses the worst toys, isn't she just like her MIL when she gives the rest of the ratty toys to Goodwill?   Really, why not just throw all of them out?   A person doesn't need to donate brand new items to Goodwill, just those in good condition.  To me, "good condition" is defined as "the same condition I would accept for used goods in my home." 

Sorry for the tangent - to get back on track:  I don't mind some of the used toys my MIL picks up for the grandkids.  Most are in really good condition and easy to clean.  I do not accepted used stuffed toys b/c I can't get them clean enough for my standards.  I did object to the used car seat.  I don't think she was really a cheapskate but frugal - why spend lots of money that will be used for a short time.

Some are grungy and have been thrown out.

Some are too grungy for my taste and are being given to Goodwill - I assume Grandma got at least some of them at Goodwill in the first place, so obviously they're not too grungy for Goodwill's standards.

Some are brand-new but cheap toys which are not appropriate for a baby (very small plastic figures, cardboard puzzles) and are also going to Goodwill.

We're keeping the board book, the Easter maraca (?!), and one of the nicer stuffed rabbits.

artk2002

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Re: Cheapskate stories
« Reply #74 on: April 01, 2013, 11:46:24 AM »
. . . Several were grungy and one of them stank of cigarette smoke.

Babybartfast got to keep the candy (which was wrapped, thank goodness) and one cheap-but-new-looking toy, and the rest are going straight back to Goodwill.

So they aren't good enough for you or your child, but they're good enough for Goodwill?  Why do you think Goodwill would want them?

Agree.

I don't know. Things that are worn or ratty or smoky have no place being donated, but things that would be alright after a wash? I used to be time rich but cash poor and I would pick up slightly dirty but otherwise fine toys at garage sales or wherever and soak them in nappy sanitiser, wash them, hang them on the line in the sun and air to dry and they'd be good as new. Now I have the presence of money and absence of time and don't have the time to a) find and b) clean toys I wouldn't consider it and would pass on toys like that to the next person who may want them.

In other words, just because *I* don't want something, or don't have the time/inclination to return it to a usable state doesn't mean that noone would. I'm not familiar with Goodwill as such so I can't comment as to what they specifically would accept but I don't think that in general things should be trashed just because I, personally, don't have the time and energy to restore them to their former glory.

OTOH when MIL tried to give us some sheets that we didn't want on the basis that they were "too good to donate" - THEN I saw red.

If we take the attitude put forth by Luci and PaperRoses to its extreme end, then nobody would ever donate anything at all.  "Not right for me" is not the same as "not right for anyone."
Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things that you didn't do than by the ones you did do. So throw off the bow lines. Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover. -Mark Twain