• May 21, 2018, 10:16:42 AM

Login with username, password and session length

Author Topic: If/when to tell my inlaws: your not supervising your kids in our home is not OK  (Read 20400 times)

0 Members and 1 Guest are viewing this topic.


  • Member
  • Posts: 1771
  • I am Queen Mommy
I think, in most cases, parents trump aunts/uncles/grandparents, but if the parents aren't parenting and overriding house rules when visiting it is problematic.  Example, when we go to my parents house, my kids, who are pretty well behaved, always liked to play with Grandmas' statues and figurines she has dotted here and there.  I wasn't in the room but heard my dad tell my then 3 yr old DD she wasn't allowed to touch, just look.  I did not override my dad's rule because it was his house, his possessions and he had the right to say that could not be played with.  If OP says no running in the house and no unsupervised kids on that high of a balcony, then the parents, as a visitor, should also enforce that rule.  Just because you let your kids run in your house or climb on furniture, does not mean that everyone wants that in their house.  OP, if you choose to keep hosting, I would go into broken record mode until they either follow YOUR house rules or they quit coming because their kids should never be told no.


  • Member
  • Posts: 3780
I do think the OP should cancel or move the location of the party.  Being that you aren't the child's parent, the best you can do is try to explain the rules to them or bring them to their mother when they don't listen to the rules.  However, it sounds as if SIL is happy to just let them run wild.  I doubt making your rules clear will change her or the children's behavior.  I have kids and feel the same way you do.  You are in an awkward position, the kids are in your home acting in a way that makes you uncomfortable, but because you are not the parent, you can't enforce rules or punish them for not behaving.  The best you could do is end the party, but I feel it would be best to avoid the stress altogether.