Hi everybody, long time lurker first time poster here.
This is something happened to my friend Lucy: she told me the story of her last discussion with her friends Mary and Tess. She strongly believes they are in the wrong place. I generally agree with her (because she is my BFF
) but this time I would like an opinion from you, wise e-hellions!
BG: Lucy, Mary and Tess are known each other since forever. Mary and Tess are BFF, Lucy is just “friend”. In the past years there have been tension between Lucy and the ladies for various reasons. Every time they make up and go on. Mary had her first baby recently. END BG.
Last month Lucy planned her own birthday party, an after dinner hang out in a cocktail bar. The time was set just after dinner time on a Saturday night. In my region going to the restaurant means a 2 hour meal so eating out before the party wasn’t a valid option (at least, this is what I thought so I had dinner at home). Lucy sent out invitations: Tess said she would come, Mary said she wasn’t sure because she was afraid her boy could take the flu (she couldn’t leave him at home and weather was freezing cold). Lucy said “ok”. Cue to 3-4 days before the party, Mary and Tess said Lucy that they had planned a restaurant dinner the same evening of the party and invited her to join. Lucy thanked them but refused to join: she had host duties and she had to be on the party site before the time set.
As predicted, Mary, Tess and some other Lucy guests who joined the “restaurant dinner” showed up late at the party. Mary left early for her baby, the others stayed for a reasonable time. Lucy was very upset: she saw the whole thing as a sabotage to her party. Would have she joined the dinner, she would have been late for her own party. Not mentioning the part where they hijacked 1/3 of the guests.
The day after the party Lucy talked to Tess and Mary, accusing them of sabotage. They were outraged and claimed to have organized the meal just to get a chance to hang out with Lucy without having to expose the baby boy to bad weather and implied Lucy was ungrateful. Conversation heated, old grudges came out and the whole thing became a war.
End of story.
Lucy still claims sabotage, I am more inclined to think that Mary and Tess are so self centered to be clueless (not that this makes them less rude!).
Mind you: I do believe Mary and Tess were rude but I can’t find the line between spite and self-centered cluelessness
Lucy has no doubt on how to handle the whole situation and I don't have a saying in that (and I don't want it either!). I'm looking for opinions. What do you think?
If you want I can give you more BG, I just think this is enough for now.