Author Topic: Asking a "Neighbor" about their primary place of residence  (Read 11808 times)

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BeagleMommy

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Re: Asking a "Neighbor" about their primary place of residence
« Reply #15 on: April 05, 2013, 12:48:06 PM »
I don't think you owe her a warning.

fountainsoflettuce

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Re: Asking a "Neighbor" about their primary place of residence
« Reply #16 on: April 05, 2013, 12:48:40 PM »
How did you find this out? If it's just a suspicion (hearsay or you made an inference), I'd leave it alone. I agree with NyaChan that trying to confront her will accomplish nothing good.

If you think a number of people know what she is doing, it makes little sense that none of them have reported it, especially in such an excellent (and full) school district. Are you absolutely sure about this?

yes I know for sure.  A letter addressed to her was delivered to my house. When I went to drop it off, her "mail drop" screwed up the cover story.  I confirmed my suspicions with real estate records.  Absent a bona fide lease and she's paying current rental rates, she does not live in the district.   She's a single mother with 2 kids working an hourly job.  I understand she wants the best for her kids but...doing so fraudulently is a problem for me.

   When discussing the school enrollment situation with other neighbors who have kids, I learned that there are several others using "mail drops" and this is one reason (allegedly) why there are not enough spots for the kids who actually do live in the district to attend this particular elementary school. 

   

EllenS

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Re: Asking a "Neighbor" about their primary place of residence
« Reply #17 on: April 05, 2013, 12:57:11 PM »
You have really put a lot of effort into tracking this woman. 

Here is the case I was thinking of.  The woman in this case will be in jail for 5 years for the larceny of educational services charge, and has other sentences related to other charges.
http://www.norwalkcitizenonline.com/news/article/5-years-in-prison-for-Tanya-McDowell-3350071.php

I understand your concern about your child's place in the school, and of course it is not legal or right for her to do this, but If this is a single mom, I would think twice before I would risk being personally responsible for sending those kids to foster care.  Especially in a situation where my kids have equally good options and her kids do not.

fountainsoflettuce

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Re: Asking a "Neighbor" about their primary place of residence
« Reply #18 on: April 05, 2013, 01:01:56 PM »
You have really put a lot of effort into tracking this woman. 

Here is the case I was thinking of.  The woman in this case will be in jail for 5 years for the larceny of educational services charge, and has other sentences related to other charges.
http://www.norwalkcitizenonline.com/news/article/5-years-in-prison-for-Tanya-McDowell-3350071.php

I understand your concern about your child's place in the school, and of course it is not legal or right for her to do this, but If this is a single mom, I would think twice before I would risk being personally responsible for sending those kids to foster care.  Especially in a situation where my kids have equally good options and her kids do not.

not really. took less than 5 minutes.  which is another reason i have a hard time believing the school district when it says it is difficult to determine or investigate such complaints.  but that's another issue i'm not going to get into.  the bottom line:  the whole situation is a mess for everyone involved.  (fyi - i'm not picking on the poor woman. there's a city counsel or state senator allegedly doing the exact same thing). 

Amara

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Re: Asking a "Neighbor" about their primary place of residence
« Reply #19 on: April 05, 2013, 01:04:09 PM »
I see her reasons for not living in the district as irrelevant. The only fact that matters is that she doesn't live in the district and her child is not entitled to attend the school. That should be pointed out to the authorities because it directly impacts every family who does live there. And that's all.

QueenfaninCA

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Re: Asking a "Neighbor" about their primary place of residence
« Reply #20 on: April 05, 2013, 01:04:26 PM »
I would ask the school district to do what the sought-after school districts in my area do: Require a utility  or property tax bill as proof of residence.

Lorelei_Evil

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Re: Asking a "Neighbor" about their primary place of residence
« Reply #21 on: April 05, 2013, 01:05:10 PM »
I see her reasons for not living in the district as irrelevant. The only fact that matters is that she doesn't live in the district and her child is not entitled to attend the school. That should be pointed out to the authorities because it directly impacts every family who does live there. And that's all.

POD.  If anyone is told, it should be the school district.

EllenS

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Re: Asking a "Neighbor" about their primary place of residence
« Reply #22 on: April 05, 2013, 01:05:53 PM »
I don't understand how registration works in your school district.  We are in a very economically diverse neigborhood, mostly "pink collar" and lower-to-middle-middle class, and you have to show up at the school with an original deed or lease in your name.  Proof of a mailing address won't cut it.

Two Ravens

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Re: Asking a "Neighbor" about their primary place of residence
« Reply #23 on: April 05, 2013, 01:07:02 PM »
How did you find this out? If it's just a suspicion (hearsay or you made an inference), I'd leave it alone. I agree with NyaChan that trying to confront her will accomplish nothing good.

If you think a number of people know what she is doing, it makes little sense that none of them have reported it, especially in such an excellent (and full) school district. Are you absolutely sure about this?

yes I know for sure.  A letter addressed to her was delivered to my house. When I went to drop it off, her "mail drop" screwed up the cover story.  I confirmed my suspicions with real estate records.  Absent a bona fide lease and she's paying current rental rates, she does not live in the district.   She's a single mother with 2 kids working an hourly job.  I understand she wants the best for her kids but...doing so fraudulently is a problem for me.

   When discussing the school enrollment situation with other neighbors who have kids, I learned that there are several others using "mail drops" and this is one reason (allegedly) why there are not enough spots for the kids who actually do live in the district to attend this particular elementary school. 

   

So you don't know her personally at all? Why would you want to confront a total stranger over something like this? It could escalate and become violent. Just follow the proper channels and then leave it alone.

fountainsoflettuce

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Re: Asking a "Neighbor" about their primary place of residence
« Reply #24 on: April 05, 2013, 01:07:39 PM »
I would ask the school district to do what the sought-after school districts in my area do: Require a utility  or property tax bill as proof of residence.

There is a such requirement, however, the requirement documentation is too easy to establish residency.  All the woman needs is to have two utility services in her name.  Doesn't mean she pays those bills or even lives at the address.   

edited - I forgot to add sorry -- I am sort of acquaintances with her.  I see her maybe 3 times a year in the neighborhood and once she was with another neighbor at another neighborhood's July 4th street party.
« Last Edit: April 05, 2013, 01:10:22 PM by fountainsoflettuce »

MommyPenguin

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Re: Asking a "Neighbor" about their primary place of residence
« Reply #25 on: April 05, 2013, 01:08:04 PM »
You have really put a lot of effort into tracking this woman. 

Here is the case I was thinking of.  The woman in this case will be in jail for 5 years for the larceny of educational services charge, and has other sentences related to other charges.
http://www.norwalkcitizenonline.com/news/article/5-years-in-prison-for-Tanya-McDowell-3350071.php

I understand your concern about your child's place in the school, and of course it is not legal or right for her to do this, but If this is a single mom, I would think twice before I would risk being personally responsible for sending those kids to foster care.  Especially in a situation where my kids have equally good options and her kids do not.

According to the article, though, that woman was selling drugs on the side.  They wrapped the two cases together, so it's hard to say what the punishment just for the school thing would be, but it might just be the $6000 some that they say she now owes the school district.

Tabby Uprising

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Re: Asking a "Neighbor" about their primary place of residence
« Reply #26 on: April 05, 2013, 01:08:55 PM »
You have really put a lot of effort into tracking this woman. 

Here is the case I was thinking of.  The woman in this case will be in jail for 5 years for the larceny of educational services charge, and has other sentences related to other charges.
http://www.norwalkcitizenonline.com/news/article/5-years-in-prison-for-Tanya-McDowell-3350071.php

I understand your concern about your child's place in the school, and of course it is not legal or right for her to do this, but If this is a single mom, I would think twice before I would risk being personally responsible for sending those kids to foster care.  Especially in a situation where my kids have equally good options and her kids do not.

What are those other options though? If that's the only elementary school, where does she send her kids if they can't get a spot?  DH and I did something similar by spending extra $$ on a house in an exceptional school district.  If people (whatever their reasons) cheated us out of a spot in the district, we couldn't afford a pricey private school any more than anyone else. 

 Look, I feel for the woman, but she's the one putting herself in this position by doing something wrong.  Fountains isn't the bad guy here for reporting wrongdoing. 

And unless she's selling drugs right outside of an elementary school like the woman in the article you linked to, I don't think her kids will end up in foster care.  Being a drug dealer really changes the scenario!

EllenS

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Re: Asking a "Neighbor" about their primary place of residence
« Reply #27 on: April 05, 2013, 01:16:32 PM »
I only mention it because the article I read - and I read several at the time, and just now, so I may have posted the wrong link - said that the 5 years was specifically for the larceny, and the other sentences were for the other charges.

All I said was that I would think twice.  And if OP not only knows where this woman lives, what her job is how much she makes, and that she is a single mom with 2 kids - she did not find that out from an Internet search of "real estate records".

The offender is doing something wrong and illegal.  I am just not sure I would personally be the one to pursue it, that's all I'm saying.

wolfie

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Re: Asking a "Neighbor" about their primary place of residence
« Reply #28 on: April 05, 2013, 01:19:30 PM »
If the woman goes to jail over this then it is the woman's fault because she broke the law in the first place. It is not the fault of someone who speaks up against wrongdoing that the perpetrator was punished.

WillyNilly

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Re: Asking a "Neighbor" about their primary place of residence
« Reply #29 on: April 05, 2013, 01:19:45 PM »
You have no obligations, etiquette wise, to warn her or speak to her first. Your obligations are to your children and to your community. Report her via the regular channels and rest assured.

In the meantime if I were you, I would start writing to local politicians about the system in general. You are paying taxes for your neighborhood and for the local schools. People who are not paying those local taxes but who are using the schools are stealing - they are taking services they are not paying for. There are all sorts of ways to fix the system (spreading out taxes more so all the schools are better, being more strict about proof of residence, looking at what the taxes in other areas are being used for that their schools are so bad, etc) and you are free to suggest any you think are best. But be a squeaky wheel and point out "hey there is a problem!"