Soooo....I'm in a situation that I never thought I'd be in.
There is a group of us that is united by a very close friend of mine who is very ill. She was diagnosed 5 years ago with cancer and decided to let her purple diety cure her instead of traditional western medicine. That's not the problem. While I wouldn't make that choice, I support her and love her.
Many of her friends, who I have come to know over the years, also believe in a the same purple diety. And they are angered by her choice as their concern is that people will blame purple diety. Since I don't follow purple diety, I don't have a dog in that hunt and don't really care.
However, no one wants to be angry at the sick lady. They support her to their face and then individually come to me with their anger and bitterness. Individually, they would tell me of their feelings...and it turns out they would then go tell sick friend that I said the things that they themselves had said.
Examples of things I have allegedly said:
"Purple diety has turned his back on friend since she is still getting sicker"
"The Purple Diety is hateful and gave friend the illness"
Just some really crazy stuff especially since I don't even believe in the purple diety! It caused minor problems but was handled with a "Do you really hear me saying stuff like that?" These people also tried to accuse me of other things related to the business as well.
For the past couple of years I worked keeping my sick friend's business afloat but recently stopped due to this group of people. Intellectually I understand why they are doing what they are doing....but I'm not interested in being their method of expression or the person they can use to expell their anger. I was the person they decided to cut out of the herd...likely because I'm very different from them.
My problem is that now friend is feeling like I abandoned her by leaving her business. The official reason I have left is that I'm working on a new project, and I am, but I could have done both for a few more months. However, the toxic nature of these other people was causing me great amounts of stress...my hair was falling out, lost weight, blood sugars were erratic, and I wasn't being the person I want to be.
I don't want to tell her that these fellow purple diety types are a huge problem for me....she's very ill, possibly close to the end, and I don't want this to be harder than necessary. But I also don't want her to feel abandoned. I've done some bean dip...but it is obviously causing her pain.
I need something better....please help!