Author Topic: Exchange with neighbor - how rude was I?  (Read 3880 times)

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Eeep!

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Re: Exchange with neighbor - how rude was I?
« Reply #15 on: April 08, 2013, 07:36:22 PM »
I honestly don't see anything that you did that would be remotely offensive. If you don't care for rosemary, you don't.
And I agree with a PP - rosemary can grow like crazy and you have to trim it so it's not like she was giving you pieces of fruit or something...
"Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind." - Dr. Seuss

barefoot_girl

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Re: Exchange with neighbor - how rude was I?
« Reply #16 on: April 08, 2013, 07:51:16 PM »
It was nice of her to offer the rosemary to you, and you were perfectly polite in your refusal - she then lost the plot and became rude. Don't over-think it.

WillyNilly

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Re: Exchange with neighbor - how rude was I?
« Reply #17 on: April 08, 2013, 08:37:50 PM »
We often say on these boards, being polite does not equal being a doormat.  You were perfectly polite in your exchange. The only person you have been rude to is yourself, by assuming you should cast yourself into ehell.

LeveeWoman

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Re: Exchange with neighbor - how rude was I?
« Reply #18 on: April 08, 2013, 08:57:16 PM »
Would it have been rude to refuse to accept free garbage? She was essentially offering you her yard trash.

Rosemary is yard trash?

WillyNilly

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Re: Exchange with neighbor - how rude was I?
« Reply #19 on: April 08, 2013, 09:11:20 PM »
Would it have been rude to refuse to accept free garbage? She was essentially offering you her yard trash.

Rosemary is yard trash?

It can be. Anything can be trash if its not wanted.

A friend of mine was lamenting all the weeds in her yard. I walked around a bit and pointed out all her "weeds" were mint, dill, chives and basil. She doesn't cook but wanted a nice lawn, to her they were weeds. Rosemary can grow pretty big and there's only so much you can do with it, so at a certain point, it becomes yard trash.

Editeer

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Re: Exchange with neighbor - how rude was I?
« Reply #20 on: April 08, 2013, 09:18:04 PM »
As a gardener, I can totally see myself trying to force excess rosemary and zucchini and oregano on neighbors. In fact, I've done it.  I once made the mailman take a cucumber. ;)

But you weren't rude at all, and the neighbor took your polite refusal much too personally.

Hexie

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Re: Exchange with neighbor - how rude was I?
« Reply #21 on: April 08, 2013, 09:48:56 PM »
Thank you all for your replies. I'm feeling much better about our exchange.  :)

If she had been offering something besides Rosemary, I might have taken her up on it!


LeveeWoman

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Re: Exchange with neighbor - how rude was I?
« Reply #22 on: April 08, 2013, 09:55:21 PM »
One woman's trash is another woman's treasure.

Hexie, you did nothing wrong.

gramma dishes

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Re: Exchange with neighbor - how rude was I?
« Reply #23 on: April 08, 2013, 10:06:13 PM »
Is there any possibility that she was hoping to convince you to ride home to get your wheelbarrow and dispose of gratefully relieve her of her "extra" rosemary?  Less hauling to the curb for her and fewer yard waste bags to fill up and pay to have picked up.

In her mind it would have been a win-win.  She could get rid of her yard stuff and (in her mind) you would get bushels and bushels of FREE rosemary!  Surely an offer you couldn't refuse!   ???

TootsNYC

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Re: Exchange with neighbor - how rude was I?
« Reply #24 on: April 09, 2013, 10:03:51 AM »
Would it have been rude to refuse to accept free garbage? She was essentially offering you her yard trash.

Rosemary is yard trash?

It can be. Anything can be trash if its not wanted.

A friend of mine was lamenting all the weeds in her yard. I walked around a bit and pointed out all her "weeds" were mint, dill, chives and basil. She doesn't cook but wanted a nice lawn, to her they were weeds. Rosemary can grow pretty big and there's only so much you can do with it, so at a certain point, it becomes yard trash.

My mom and I used to discuss "when do 'leftovers' become 'garbage'?" and decided, "it becomes trash when  you don't want it anymore. As long as you're intending to eat it, it's 'leftovers.' "