Author Topic: A swimming issue...would this be "stealing" or entitled?  (Read 2921 times)

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guihong

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A swimming issue...would this be "stealing" or entitled?
« on: April 09, 2013, 05:39:09 PM »
Hi all,

BG: My DD14 has recently gotten into competitive swimming, and I hired a private instructor who was a member of the nearby university's swim team this past season (season is over and she is a senior).  We meet twice weekly at the university pool for her hour lesson.   She has had two lessons, so far.

During last lesson, DD asked the instructor if she could stay after lesson and practice what she just learned.  The instructor said yes, in fact encouraged it and urged her to practice on off days as well.  I asked the instructor if we had to buy a pass if she wanted to swim (or if I wanted to swim as well-there are lanes for lap swims), and she said technically, we did, but if we told the desk that we were there for a private lesson, then that would be OK.  We could use her name if we wanted.  Daughter and instructor swam together for fun after the first lesson.

I'm worried that we're going to get "caught" by the lifeguard, and not have the proper pass.  It also feels like using the pool like a Y when I know it's supposed to be for students/faculty.  I don't like sneaking around, and can't enjoy it.

Pertinent information:

*We do have a city pool that doesn't have any diving board (which the kids love), but does have lanes, a nice facility, and frankly, longer hours.  Membership there is either by session, or annual.

Question: Would it be piggish or entitled to just broach the question of buying a pass at the university pool, if I tell them DD is taking the swim lessons?  What about swimming after her lesson, when we're already there?  I suppose the worst they can say is "No". 

Thanks in advance!





Carotte

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Re: A swimming issue...would this be "stealing" or entitled?
« Reply #1 on: April 09, 2013, 05:49:15 PM »
Your DD staying after the lesson to swim is IMO fine,
If you actually can purchase a pass it means they allow 'outsiders' (from the students/faculty) to swim there so I don't see where the problem is.
Do you mean buying a pass for you and having your DD enter by giving the instructor's name? or buying two passes?
I wouldn't use the instructor's name to go in if I didn't actually have a lesson that day but maybe it's common practice where you are. If you just ask and accept a negative answer there's no problem.


If they sell outsiders a pass I would just see between the two pools which is closer/open when you would use it/price per session... just like you would with two regular pools.
A university pool might be closed to non university swim-team members more often during the season for example.

CaffeineKatie

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Re: A swimming issue...would this be "stealing" or entitled?
« Reply #2 on: April 09, 2013, 05:52:08 PM »
Using something you aren't entitled to is stealing, even if someone not in any position of authority tells you it's ok.  You are teaching your DD to steal.  And I don't know about this pool, but at our local public pools and tennis courts, and at the local university facilities, there are signs forbiding the use of the facilities for paid coaching.  I would urge you to set a good example for your DD, and ask the pool manager what the policy is.  The teen years are not a good time to let her think anything goes, as long as you don't get caught.

Calistoga

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Re: A swimming issue...would this be "stealing" or entitled?
« Reply #3 on: April 09, 2013, 05:54:08 PM »
Mmm.

Well. Your DD is really taking lessons, and as long as she and the instructor aren't taking up the pool when others would like to be using it- IE, staying well past lesson time to splash around for fun- I think it's fine for your daughter to enjoy the extra time with her trainer.

But if you guys are going to be there without the trainer, I think you should go ahead and buy the passes. It's not right to fudge the system, and it's important to teach your daughter honesty.

I think you should ask about buying a pass. If they say no, they say no.

I'd worry about getting caught and getting the trainer in trouble as well.

NyaChan

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Re: A swimming issue...would this be "stealing" or entitled?
« Reply #4 on: April 09, 2013, 05:55:14 PM »
If your daughter just stays in the water after class, I don't consider that a problem.  She was allowed in the building to swim and they did not set a time limit.  If a lifeguard asks if you have a pass explain that she finished her lesson and is practicing.  If that's a problem, they will tell you.  If you are getting in as well, or your daughter wants to come in on a different day when she doesn't have class, then I think you should buy a pass.

guihong

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Re: A swimming issue...would this be "stealing" or entitled?
« Reply #5 on: April 09, 2013, 05:55:37 PM »
Using something you aren't entitled to is stealing, even if someone not in any position of authority tells you it's ok.  You are teaching your DD to steal.  And I don't know about this pool, but at our local public pools and tennis courts, and at the local university facilities, there are signs forbiding the use of the facilities for paid coaching.  I would urge you to set a good example for your DD, and ask the pool manager what the policy is.  The teen years are not a good time to let her think anything goes, as long as you don't get caught.

Yes, that's how I'm feeling.  I don't think it's right to "technically" be OK; I want to know for sure.  Thanks!



JenJay

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Re: A swimming issue...would this be "stealing" or entitled?
« Reply #6 on: April 09, 2013, 06:00:52 PM »
If your daughter just stays in the water after class, I don't consider that a problem.  She was allowed in the building to swim and they did not set a time limit.  If a lifeguard asks if you have a pass explain that she finished her lesson and is practicing.  If that's a problem, they will tell you.  If you are getting in as well, or your daughter wants to come in on a different day when she doesn't have class, then I think you should buy a pass.

I agree

DavidH

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Re: A swimming issue...would this be "stealing" or entitled?
« Reply #7 on: April 09, 2013, 07:01:30 PM »
I agree with JenJen, if it's a matter of staying in a bit longer after the lesson, it seems reasonable to me.  If you're coming on other days too, or if you're swimming as well, then I think you should inquire about buying a pass for that pool or another one.  If when you inquire about a pass, they say it's okay to come at other times, then everything is fine, if not, then either you end up buying a pass to that pool or to another one.  I don't see anything wrong with asking, as long as you accept that the answer might be no. 

jpcher

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Re: A swimming issue...would this be "stealing" or entitled?
« Reply #8 on: April 09, 2013, 07:14:51 PM »
Using something you aren't entitled to is stealing, even if someone not in any position of authority tells you it's ok.  You are teaching your DD to steal.  And I don't know about this pool, but at our local public pools and tennis courts, and at the local university facilities, there are signs forbiding the use of the facilities for paid coaching.  I would urge you to set a good example for your DD, and ask the pool manager what the policy is.  The teen years are not a good time to let her think anything goes, as long as you don't get caught.

Yes, that's how I'm feeling.  I don't think it's right to "technically" be OK; I want to know for sure.  Thanks!

I'm glad you're feeling that way, gui.

If your daughter stays in the pool with her coach for a while after the swim lesson, I think this is perfectly fine. A bit of extracurricular fun swim helps build the coach/student relationship.

If you try to go into the pool to join in with their fun? Not so fine.

Spring Water on Sundays

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Re: A swimming issue...would this be "stealing" or entitled?
« Reply #9 on: April 10, 2013, 10:41:11 AM »
I agree with everyone in this thread. A little extra time immediately after the lesson to practice what she just learned? That seems fine. An extra person (the OP) getting in the pool or swimming on days there is no lesson? Buy a pass.

I wouldn't take the coach's word for it that it's ok. As a college senior, she's what, 21? Young adults at that age don't always have their moral compasses as fine tuned as an adult with more life experience. Not that the coach is a bad or immoral person, but she just may not be totally thinking through the consequences or moral ambiguities in her effort to do something nice for you and your daughter.

OP, you said that knowing you're doing something morally ambiguous takes the enjoyment out of the activity. I'm the same way. For me, the price of the season pass would totally be worth the clean conscience. :)

Virg

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Re: A swimming issue...would this be "stealing" or entitled?
« Reply #10 on: April 10, 2013, 12:19:59 PM »
The simple answer is that there's no simple answer to your direct question, because so much depends on the rules of the pool she's using.  However, the easy way to ascertain is to ask the management of the pool (start by asking the lifeguard who to talk to if it's not obvious where you should direct your query) and follow their lead.  If they give you the OK for swimming after lessons, then you're fine, and if not, then you'll know for sure that you need to buy a pass.  Just ask and you're all good.

ETA: I just noticed your actual question was whether it would be piggish or entitled to ask about a pass, and the answer to that is a resounding no.  Asking is the most polite approach.

Virg
« Last Edit: April 10, 2013, 12:21:51 PM by Virg »

sparksals

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Re: A swimming issue...would this be "stealing" or entitled?
« Reply #11 on: April 10, 2013, 03:22:51 PM »
I think it is perfectly fine for your DD to stay and swim.  If you want to join her, I think you should buy a pass.