General Etiquette > All In A Day's Work

I cannot give you what you want

<< < (2/7) > >>

mmswm:
I worked in banking, in a department that had the ability to actually adjust transactions on customer accounts.  I truly know what it feels like to have somebody get irate because they want you to do something illegal.  In my case we had management blessing to tell the customer "No, I cannot accommodate this request because it is against the law.  I will have to end this call/ignore any future emails if you persist in asking". After that point, we could bump the customer to our supervisors.

The only thing you can do is keep telling her no.  Is your supervisor of any help?

cicero:
<passing the spine polish>

And put "DO NOT JADE" as your screensaver, or as a note that said person cannot see

Tia2:
While I would generally agree with the 'do not JADE', in this case with a customer, I think there is nothing wrong in justifying what you are saying.

I know you have already told her this is illegal, but I think I'd keep justifying my refusal by saying 'because it's against the law' to prevent her later saying 'but she didn't tell me' (conveniently forgetting the earlier meetings where you did)

One Fish, Two Fish:
Thank you so much for the emotional back up.
My supervisor will take over for me if necessary, but I really don't want to have to go that route until it is completely needed.  I don't want to use it unless she asks to speak with my superior.  I'm in line for a promotion that could possibly put many more situations like this in my lap.  I want to prove that I am capable of handling them myself.
I have tried to justify my answer to her in the past.  It just seems to give her more wiggle room to ask her request from a slightly different angle.  My only answer to her today will be "What you are asking me for is illegal, and I will not be able to do it."  I have decided that our meeting will not take place in my office (which is private).  I will be speaking to her in a neutral office location with two other people present. 
Usually, I'm a let's figure this out kind of person.  I don't like having to tell people "no."  I've done it before, but people will accept the answer.  I think that's why I'm having such a hard time with this case.  This woman seem to know how to push everyone of my buttons.  I'm proud that I've only ranted about her to one sympathetic coworker. 
I am ready for this meeting to be over.  I'm tired of giving this woman room in my head.

TootsNYC:

--- Quote from: mmswm on April 10, 2013, 12:56:12 AM ---I worked in banking, in a department that had the ability to actually adjust transactions on customer accounts.  I truly know what it feels like to have somebody get irate because they want you to do something illegal.  In my case we had management blessing to tell the customer "No, I cannot accommodate this request because it is against the law.  I will have to end this call/ignore any future emails if you persist in asking". After that point, we could bump the customer to our supervisors.

The only thing you can do is keep telling her no.  Is your supervisor of any help?

--- End quote ---

In fact, I would REQUIRE this of my people.

I once asked a company for help with their product in a way that revealed I would be using it contrary to their company's official policy (multiple users instead of just one. Their insurance wouldn't cover them if they in any way ever appeared to condone this. The lady said "I'm sorry, I have to end this call." and hung up.

In your case, you can't hang up on her, but you can say, "I'm sorry, you are asking me to do something illegal. I will have to end this conversation."

Be abrupt like that. Make it clear that what she is asking is DANGEROUS TO YOU and you want to DISTANCE YOURSELF.

Be a little offended! This woman wants to hurt you in order to get what she wants. Show that offendedness. It's completely appropriate.

Smart move, meeting in a neutral office.

You can even say something about the other people present: "In front of witnesses, I am saying to you: what you are asking me to do is illegal, and I will not do it. I'm going to end this conversation now."

Act as though the stakes are really high--because they are.



Also, "will not," perhaps, instead of "cannot," to make it moer personal and clearer.

Navigation

[0] Message Index

[#] Next page

[*] Previous page

Go to full version