News: There is a new Ehell Kindness Project!  Check it out in the "Extending the Hand of Kindness" folder or here: http://www.etiquettehell.com/smf/index.php?topic=139832.msg3372084#msg3372084   

  • July 01, 2016, 05:25:49 AM

Login with username, password and session length

Author Topic: Please pay for my wedding dress  (Read 5796 times)

0 Members and 3 Guests are viewing this topic.

Julian

  • I lost it between Thriller and Gangnam Style...
  • Member
  • Posts: 1194
Re: Please pay for my wedding dress
« Reply #45 on: June 29, 2016, 04:19:00 PM »
I think they're already in so deep, financially and with the time commitments, that it feels like half. The $150 is the last straw. (Researching wedding options in Tanzania would have been my last straw.)

It was actually Tasmania which is a tad less exotic, but almost as far away.   ;D

This evil little Tasmanian is wondering if Bridezilla figured the different seasons in the Southern Hemisphere into her dress shopping epics.  Because if she is buying a dress for a summer wedding, she's gonna freeze half to death in our winter...

Now, if we could figure out exactly where and when...   >:D

blarg314

  • Member
  • Posts: 8980
Re: Please pay for my wedding dress
« Reply #46 on: June 29, 2016, 07:48:57 PM »

I'd say that going into a wedding, a bridesmaid typically expects to cover her dress, possibly matching shoes, plus the cost of a bachelorette evening or wedding shower. Time wise, they might expect a few afternoons of dress shopping and fittings.  That might still be a stretch, but they'd manage because they want to be part of their friend's wedding.

The problem is that in some cases, the expectations get a lot more extreme. The dress becomes a high end designer dress, and professional makeup and hair styling for the wedding are added. The bachelorette evening becomes a bachelorette spa weekend in Vegas, plus and engagement party, plus a traditional wedding shower. And then there are the requests to help make centrepieces, or favours, to help save money.And this isn't usually spelled out before the process starts - it creeps up on them bit by bit, and with a stressed out or demanding bride, they're reluctant to push back, or refuse to play along.

For men, it's generally tux rental or a suit - the first is generally cheaper than buying a new dress, the second is something they may already have - and a bachelor party.

Helping to pay for the wedding dress, though, is a new one on me. I have heard of brides demanding tanning sessions so the bridal party isn't pasty white or irregularly tanned, which is generally also regarded as too far.



NFPwife

  • Member
  • Posts: 1415
Re: Please pay for my wedding dress
« Reply #47 on: June 29, 2016, 08:02:44 PM »
I think they're already in so deep, financially and with the time commitments, that it feels like half. The $150 is the last straw. (Researching wedding options in Tanzania would have been my last straw.)

It was actually Tasmania which is a tad less exotic, but almost as far away.   ;D

This evil little Tasmanian is wondering if Bridezilla figured the different seasons in the Southern Hemisphere into her dress shopping epics.  Because if she is buying a dress for a summer wedding, she's gonna freeze half to death in our winter...

Now, if we could figure out exactly where and when...   >:D

I think the bridesmaids are supposed to take care of the weather, I'm sure it's on one of their spreadsheets. :D

LadyR

  • Member
  • Posts: 1037
    • Musings of A Pinterest Mom
Re: Please pay for my wedding dress
« Reply #48 on: Yesterday at 09:05:54 AM »

Do men involved in weddings have to pay for their suits too?

Usually.  Renting a tux isn't super expensive, though, especially compared to the price of the bridesmaid dresses.

I have a friend who's husband is best man in a wedding and it involved a $1000 custom suit. She is not happy, but her husband doesn't want to fight with his friend.


Kiwipinball

  • Member
  • Posts: 1222
Re: Please pay for my wedding dress
« Reply #49 on: Yesterday at 01:58:18 PM »

Do men involved in weddings have to pay for their suits too?

Usually.  Renting a tux isn't super expensive, though, especially compared to the price of the bridesmaid dresses.

I have a friend who's husband is best man in a wedding and it involved a $1000 custom suit. She is not happy, but her husband doesn't want to fight with his friend.

Equality! Of course I would prefer HCs were equally UNdemanding of both genders.

Outdoor Girl

  • Member
  • Posts: 16528
Re: Please pay for my wedding dress
« Reply #50 on: Yesterday at 02:14:51 PM »
For that price, he'd better be keeping the suit!  That's outrageous.

(If/when I get married, BF's best friends don't have a lot of money.  I don't want anything too formal so I'm going to propose that we buy them each a pair of black dress pants and a white dress shirt and call it good.  Maybe get them each a pair of black sneakers or just let them wear whatever black shoes they might have. And they'll have one set of 'dress' clothes, if they need them for another occasion.)
After cleaning out my Dad's house, I have this advice:  If you haven't used it in a year, throw it out!!!!.
Ontario

lakey

  • Member
  • Posts: 691
Re: Please pay for my wedding dress
« Reply #51 on: Yesterday at 05:30:15 PM »
Quote
I have a friend who's husband is best man in a wedding and it involved a $1000 custom suit. She is not happy, but her husband doesn't want to fight with his friend.

That's a huge financial imposition. I just do not understand how anyone can be so self-centered as to expect others to spend that amount of money on their "special day". It's one day. Mature, well adjusted adults understand that the world doesn't revolve around their wedding day.

I have had so many incidents where I had found myself getting angry and resentful over someone's unreasonable behavior. What I've found out is that most times, if you nicely talk to the person about it, they'll see reason. And friendships do withstand it. As a matter of fact, when you no longer feel that you are being taken advantage of, the friendship is stronger.

iridaceae

  • Boring in real life as well
  • Member
  • Posts: 4326
Re: Please pay for my wedding dress
« Reply #52 on: Today at 04:25:35 AM »

Do men involved in weddings have to pay for their suits too?

Usually.  Renting a tux isn't super expensive, though, especially compared to the price of the bridesmaid dresses.

I have a friend who's husband is best man in a wedding and it involved a $1000 custom suit. She is not happy, but her husband doesn't want to fight with his friend.

We had a wedding couple scout the Hotel for the reception. The wedding coordinator said nope, goodbye when the Bridezilla demanded custom fit tuxedos for the banquet staff. Then returned to the office and due to that and other demands said "biggest Bridezilla I've ever seen. We are refusing to have her reception here. End of story." And we didn't.
Nothing to see here.