Author Topic: Neighbourly weirdness? (ie, not being the "weird" neighbour)  (Read 8602 times)

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Eden

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Re: Neighbourly weirdness? (ie, not being the "weird" neighbour)
« Reply #30 on: April 11, 2013, 03:16:16 PM »
I should clarify that I'm all for weird neighbors. Finding something odd or weird isn't necessarily a negative in my book. On the contrary, I would be fascinated about learning someone's unique proclivities.

Outdoor Girl

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Re: Neighbourly weirdness? (ie, not being the "weird" neighbour)
« Reply #31 on: April 11, 2013, 03:18:33 PM »
^^ If it is a fallen branch off a tree in your little neighbourhood park, I don't think any one would care if you took that branch home.  But the spread of invasive species is a good point; if you go camping a fair distance from home, you shouldn't bring branches home from there.
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hobish

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Re: Neighbourly weirdness? (ie, not being the "weird" neighbour)
« Reply #32 on: April 11, 2013, 03:46:51 PM »
I live in a small neighborhood of houses on a dead end road. People are especially friendly, without being nosy. In normal circumstances I think most people might think it is a little odd, but would be happy to give you some wood and talk about whittling … unless they knew you were the lady with the sign on her door telling people to go away. That’s a bit much. There’s a lady on the block with one of those “No Dogs” signs on her lawn, which honestly I think is cute; but I’d be a little confused if she came trotting up in my yard with her dog, KWIM? 

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Knitterly

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Re: Neighbourly weirdness? (ie, not being the "weird" neighbour)
« Reply #33 on: April 11, 2013, 04:06:21 PM »
Knitterly, aren't you the poster that has two no soliciting signs on the door?

I just found the thread and it looks like I am correct. The signs are very clear that you do not like being disturbed when you are home. I think you should extend that same courtesy to your neighbors.

I vote for going to a local park. I wouldn't want to be disturbed either.

Yes.

I'm okay with my neighbours knocking my door.  Not at all cool with salesfolks doing it.
That's why there's the addendum about "girl guide cookies are always welcome".

My neighbour across the road (whom I really don't know that well) popped over with a piece of misdelivered mail and just about wet herself laughing at the sign (seriously, the solicitation in the neighbourhood is off the charts crazy).

I will stick to talking to folks who are already out doing yardwork, though.  You do make a good point about not disturbing folks.

I see a big difference between solicitors and a neighbor asking if they can pick up twigs, branches, or leaves (for science projects) from your door. Or a neighbor asking you to sign a neighborhood petition, even.

It's not about "not being disturbed"; it's about "not being approached by salespeople."

One of her two signs absolutely does read as a "do not disturb" sign. I copied it below. I am on my phone, so quoting was difficult.

I think if one does not want to be disturbed, they shouldn't disturb others.

The new one reads: "Baby sleeping!  If you don't have a LEGITIMATE reason to be here, please go away.  Otherwise, please KNOCK!  Don't ring the bell.  Thank you."

I should note - that sign is only up when LK is sleeping and only because every other "please don't ring the bell" sign failed to deter anyone from ever ringing the bell.
It's been replaced with a "doorbell broken" sign anyway, as the bell has been disconnected.

If someone had a "no trespassing" sign or a "no soliciting" sign, I would actually walk away and not bother them.

In any case, it's been fairly well established that the best course of action would be to just wait and talk to people in their yards.

We live a very family oriented neighbourhood and there are always people out and about.  I think that if I went for a walk on a sunny Saturday morning, odds would be good that I'd find someone outside clearing their yard of twigs and debris.

that_one_girl

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Re: Neighbourly weirdness? (ie, not being the "weird" neighbour)
« Reply #34 on: April 11, 2013, 05:06:51 PM »
I would love to have a neighbor come over and remove branches from my yard!
Even if I had a 'No Soliciting' sign up, I wouldn't mind you coming over to ask for a mutually beneficial favor.   I think the 'No Soliciting' applies to people asking you to buy something or asking for a monetary donation!

Lady Godiva

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Re: Neighbourly weirdness? (ie, not being the "weird" neighbour)
« Reply #35 on: April 11, 2013, 05:21:21 PM »
I'd find your request interesting, not weird. Most people that I know (and I) would be glad to let you take their discarded branches for carving, and would be interested to learn about your craft and your creations. I'd take it as a compliment to my trees that you find the discarded wood useful and that it can be made into something beautiful. And if I had to have one of my beloved old maples cut down, I might ask if you'd accept a commission to carve something out of the wood so I could remember it.

Hmmmmm

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Re: Neighbourly weirdness? (ie, not being the "weird" neighbour)
« Reply #36 on: April 11, 2013, 05:23:42 PM »
I actually wouldn't find it odd at all.

We used to have a large pecan tree in our front yard (pah-kahn... none of that pee-can stuff in our yard) and anytime a large limb would fall any neighbor who smoked meat would be asking for it.

My DH used to also do Texas flags out of old fence posts and donate to schools/charities to acution off (they'd  fetch $250 to $600 for something made out of a old boards and a little paint). So anytime he found a person with a fence coming down that had the 5" wide boards he'd stop and ask for some of the boards. No one ever seemed annoyed, but happy that their trash was going for a good cause.

Memphis1986

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Re: Neighbourly weirdness? (ie, not being the "weird" neighbour)
« Reply #37 on: April 11, 2013, 05:30:37 PM »
You could have as many branches as you want if you'd give whittling lessons! I've been married to a Welshman for 3 years and the closest I've got to a love spoon is a wooden kitchen spoon with marker pen on it!! :P

Thipu1

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Re: Neighbourly weirdness? (ie, not being the "weird" neighbour)
« Reply #38 on: April 11, 2013, 05:37:29 PM »
I'd probably love to have a neighbor like you. 

A while ago I considered writing a 'Harry Potter' story about a family that had magical talent but did not attend Hogwarts or any other school of magic.

 One of the children was a boy with a good eye for wood.  He would walk through the forest behind the family farm to gather twigs and small branches that he would then sell to Mr. Olivander when the family made its semi-annual trip to Diagonal Alley.

We have plenty of beautiful trees in the neighborhood.  It's a pity we can't meet you and talk about your hobby. Whittling can produce very beautiful things. 

Curious Cat

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Re: Neighbourly weirdness? (ie, not being the "weird" neighbour)
« Reply #39 on: April 11, 2013, 06:16:03 PM »
Knitterly, aren't you the poster that has two no soliciting signs on the door?

I just found the thread and it looks like I am correct. The signs are very clear that you do not like being disturbed when you are home. I think you should extend that same courtesy to your neighbors.

I vote for going to a local park. I wouldn't want to be disturbed either.

Yes.

I'm okay with my neighbours knocking my door.  Not at all cool with salesfolks doing it.
That's why there's the addendum about "girl guide cookies are always welcome".

My neighbour across the road (whom I really don't know that well) popped over with a piece of misdelivered mail and just about wet herself laughing at the sign (seriously, the solicitation in the neighbourhood is off the charts crazy).

I will stick to talking to folks who are already out doing yardwork, though.  You do make a good point about not disturbing folks.

I see a big difference between solicitors and a neighbor asking if they can pick up twigs, branches, or leaves (for science projects) from your door. Or a neighbor asking you to sign a neighborhood petition, even.

It's not about "not being disturbed"; it's about "not being approached by salespeople."

One of her two signs absolutely does read as a "do not disturb" sign. I copied it below. I am on my phone, so quoting was difficult.

I think if one does not want to be disturbed, they shouldn't disturb others.

The new one reads: "Baby sleeping!  If you don't have a LEGITIMATE reason to be here, please go away.  Otherwise, please KNOCK!  Don't ring the bell.  Thank you."

I'm not sure what one has to do with the other? I'm sure the OP wouldn't be disregarding any "please don't knock" signs and it seems meanspirited to suggest that she would, or that because she has certain times she needs silence that she isn't allowed to interact with her neighbors. 

OP I think you would be perfectly fine and I can't think of anyone I know who wouldn't prefer to have "something" done with nice wood rather than see it trashed.

hobish

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Re: Neighbourly weirdness? (ie, not being the "weird" neighbour)
« Reply #40 on: April 11, 2013, 06:47:16 PM »
It is not mean spirited to suggest that if someone has a Don't Do This sign on their property it would be a little odd for them to do it on other people's. I mean, the sign says "If you don't have a LEGITIMATE reason to be here, please go away." Who is to say knocking on doors asking for debris is legitimate business? The homeowner, obviously; but it isn't mean spirited to suggest other home owners may feel the way Knitterly does. She wants people to go away ... maybe they do, too.
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jpcher

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Re: Neighbourly weirdness? (ie, not being the "weird" neighbour)
« Reply #41 on: April 11, 2013, 07:28:52 PM »
However, Knitterly already stated that she would respect any signs on doors and not knock . . . along with saying that she won't knock, sign or not, but will seek out neighbors that are outside.

I think this is a perfect approach.

I don't know that I would find it neither weird nor intrusive if a neighbor knocked on my door with OPs question, but I think the more peaceful solution is to approach the neighbors while they are out in the open.

(or leave an introduction note on their door along with an explanation as to why you want that particularly tasty branch that's laying next to their tree. ;) )

cross_patch

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Re: Neighbourly weirdness? (ie, not being the "weird" neighbour)
« Reply #42 on: April 11, 2013, 07:42:22 PM »
I would not be pleased to have you pop over and knock on my door and would refuse your "request" ( I have a no trespass sign on the front lawn) .  My next door neighbor however would love to see you and would talk your ear off and a third - well you're a braver soul than I if you brave the geese in his fenced yard.

My point is everyone is going to feel differently, and as long as you take no for an answer, respect no trespassing signs and fences and don't interfere with animals - you should be ok

Why would this make you not pleased? I don't understand, and I'm just curious. Would it be the principle of asking for the branch, or that you want to keep the branches? I think I'm confused because I understood it to be a genuine request on knitterly's part, but the way you have put request in inverted commas implies that it's not. But you can't read tone over the Internet so I wanted to check!

Onyx_TKD

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Re: Neighbourly weirdness? (ie, not being the "weird" neighbour)
« Reply #43 on: April 11, 2013, 08:09:53 PM »
I would not be pleased to have you pop over and knock on my door and would refuse your "request" ( I have a no trespass sign on the front lawn) .  My next door neighbor however would love to see you and would talk your ear off and a third - well you're a braver soul than I if you brave the geese in his fenced yard.

My point is everyone is going to feel differently, and as long as you take no for an answer, respect no trespassing signs and fences and don't interfere with animals - you should be ok

Why would this make you not pleased? I don't understand, and I'm just curious. Would it be the principle of asking for the branch, or that you want to keep the branches? I think I'm confused because I understood it to be a genuine request on knitterly's part, but the way you have put request in inverted commas implies that it's not. But you can't read tone over the Internet so I wanted to check!

I got the impression that snowdragon's point about being "not pleased" was related more to the act of knocking on the door at a house with a "No trespassing" sign than to the request itself. She has clearly indicated that she doesn't want people coming on her property by posting a "No trespassing" sign. Therefore, it makes sense that she would be annoyed if someone ignored the sign to knock on her door anyway, especially if their request/reason for knocking was purely for their benefit rather than hers. I.e., there's nothing inherently wrong with making the request, but it's wrong to ignore a home-owner's signals that uninvited door-knockers are not welcome.

Knitterly

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Re: Neighbourly weirdness? (ie, not being the "weird" neighbour)
« Reply #44 on: April 11, 2013, 08:14:45 PM »
It is not mean spirited to suggest that if someone has a Don't Do This sign on their property it would be a little odd for them to do it on other people's. I mean, the sign says "If you don't have a LEGITIMATE reason to be here, please go away." Who is to say knocking on doors asking for debris is legitimate business? The homeowner, obviously; but it isn't mean spirited to suggest other home owners may feel the way Knitterly does. She wants people to go away ... maybe they do, too.

I want sales people to not ring my doorbell when my baby is sleeping because it interrutps her naps and frequently means she won't go back down.

I hope I can make a few things really clear:
1) If I don't have my "don't ring the bell" sign up, the bell is fair game (to all but solicitors - especially that same lawn care company who keeps harassing the entire neighbourhood).
2) You can't read the sign from the door.
3) If someone had a sign on their lawn or door or anything, I would not bother them.  Period.  I would respect their privacy.
4) I am not the neighbourhood grouch.  I am also not the only person in the neighbourhood who is flat out annoyed by the sheer quantity of scammy salespeople we get flocking through here.

I really don't see my request to please not ring my bell because the baby is sleeping as conveying that I never want to meet my neighbours.  It's not a "do not disturb" sign.  It's an "I don't want to buy your junk" and a "please for the love of deity don't wake up my sleeping kid" sign.  I would not find it at all strange if a neighbour with a sign stating that they didn't want to be disturbed because their baby is sleeping came up and knocked on my door during a non-nap hour.  I wouldn't find it strange at all.  But then, I might, myself, be a little strange.  The jury's still out on that.   ;)

(quote tree trim)
I got the impression that snowdragon's point about being "not pleased" was related more to the act of knocking on the door at a house with a "No trespassing" sign than to the request itself. She has clearly indicated that she doesn't want people coming on her property by posting a "No trespassing" sign. Therefore, it makes sense that she would be annoyed if someone ignored the sign to knock on her door anyway, especially if their request/reason for knocking was purely for their benefit rather than hers. I.e., there's nothing inherently wrong with making the request, but it's wrong to ignore a home-owner's signals that uninvited door-knockers are not welcome.
I got the same impression.  And I wholeheartedly agree that one should not knock where one is clearly not welcome.

And if snowdragon lived in my neighbourhood and I saw her no-trespassing sign, I would certainly not trespass, no matter how temptingly the tree branches might lay on her yard.