Author Topic: Facebook - Friend Requests from People I don't Know  (Read 4024 times)

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Texas Mom

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Facebook - Friend Requests from People I don't Know
« on: April 15, 2013, 12:14:52 AM »
Am I totally out of touch?

I have a FB account that I don't use much.

I recently added someone I know IRL (who lives out of state), so we can share pictures of our new puppies with each other. 

I immedately started getting friend requests from people she is friends with, but I don't have a clue who they are?

Is this the way things are done? 

I find it rude and intrusive to get friend requests from people I don't know.



Comments appreciated.

reflection5

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Re: Facebook - Friend Requests from People I don't Know
« Reply #1 on: April 15, 2013, 12:22:40 AM »
You need to change your privacy settings.  Refuse the friend requests.

katycoo

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Re: Facebook - Friend Requests from People I don't Know
« Reply #2 on: April 15, 2013, 12:22:51 AM »
People approach facebook differently.  Some use it to stay in touch with existing friends, some use it to make new friends.

If you do not want to accept these requests, simply decline them.  But its not rude to send a request.

Lindee

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Re: Facebook - Friend Requests from People I don't Know
« Reply #3 on: April 15, 2013, 12:40:30 AM »
Are you sure they are actually asking to friend you? Facebook now "suggests" friends who are on your friends friend list and it can look as if they are asking but if you click accept request you will be the one requesting them. If they are actually asking you then it is not rude to decline their request.  My husband is now friends with several distant relatives due to this misunderstanding, with them probably thinking "who is he? but Ok,  click."

CLE_Girl

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Re: Facebook - Friend Requests from People I don't Know
« Reply #4 on: April 15, 2013, 09:43:40 AM »
Are you sure they are actually asking to friend you? Facebook now "suggests" friends who are on your friends friend list and it can look as if they are asking but if you click accept request you will be the one requesting them. If they are actually asking you then it is not rude to decline their request.  My husband is now friends with several distant relatives due to this misunderstanding, with them probably thinking "who is he? but Ok,  click."

It's all so possible it was a mistake.  Just this morning I was looking at the "suggested Friends" list, and accidently friended someone when I meant to look at the "friends in common" list. 

You don't have to accept these friend request and if you accidentally friend some one you can recall the request by going to their page and canceling it. 

Yvaine

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Re: Facebook - Friend Requests from People I don't Know
« Reply #5 on: April 15, 2013, 10:34:06 AM »
Are you sure they are actually asking to friend you? Facebook now "suggests" friends who are on your friends friend list and it can look as if they are asking but if you click accept request you will be the one requesting them. If they are actually asking you then it is not rude to decline their request.  My husband is now friends with several distant relatives due to this misunderstanding, with them probably thinking "who is he? but Ok,  click."

This is very possible. It's hugely annoying--like how Facebook also sometimes nags you to RSVP to stuff you weren't even invited to, if the privacy settings are set wrong.

They also may just be really gregarious people who like to add friends-of-friends. Just ignore if you don't want to friend them.

bah12

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Re: Facebook - Friend Requests from People I don't Know
« Reply #6 on: April 15, 2013, 11:18:33 AM »
Yeah, I would double check and make sure that they are actual friends request and not just suggestions made by facebook.  But if they are actual requests, just decline them.  I don't think it's rude to send a request though. 

Luci

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Re: Facebook - Friend Requests from People I don't Know
« Reply #7 on: April 15, 2013, 11:24:22 AM »
There aren't very many people with my first and last name, but every once in a while I get a request even though I have my high school and university on my profile.

I usually send a PM politely saying I don't know the requester and suggesting that I am the wrong Luci. Once I got an '"Oops! I'm sorry. Looking for someone else letter", but the rest of the time they never request again.

mharbourgirl

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Re: Facebook - Friend Requests from People I don't Know
« Reply #8 on: April 15, 2013, 02:25:09 PM »
Also, if you send a friend request by accident, you can cancel it if they haven't accepted yet.

Texas Mom

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Re: Facebook - Friend Requests from People I don't Know
« Reply #9 on: April 17, 2013, 11:39:41 AM »
Thanks for your input, everyone.

They are definately friend requests.  I'll just reject them & forget about it.

JeanFromBNA

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Re: Facebook - Friend Requests from People I don't Know
« Reply #10 on: April 17, 2013, 04:25:48 PM »
I have heard that this technique is also used by spammers and other nefarious types.  Did I hear correctly?

Judah

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Re: Facebook - Friend Requests from People I don't Know
« Reply #11 on: April 17, 2013, 04:48:12 PM »
I have heard that this technique is also used by spammers and other nefarious types.  Did I hear correctly?

Maybe, but I wouldn't assume that the "Friends" of my "Friends" were "Friendding" me for nefarious purposes.  In my experience, it's pretty typical for people to do this to expand their circles. For some people, Facebook is more fun the more "friends" you have. 
Ask for what you want. Let's be clear on this one:
Subtle hints don't work.
Strong hints don't work.
Really obvious hints don't work.
Just say it!

-The Car Talk Guys

DottyG

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Re: Facebook - Friend Requests from People I don't Know
« Reply #12 on: April 17, 2013, 07:22:01 PM »
Quote
I find it rude and intrusive to get friend requests from people I don't know.

It might not be how you wish to use FB, but it's not rude at all.  I've made several friends through other friends and have quite a few FB friends that I've never actually met in real life.

If you don't want to friend them, just decline the request.  That's why it's a request instead of an automatic thing - everyone can choose whether or not to allow this person into their Newsfeed.


acicularis

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Re: Facebook - Friend Requests from People I don't Know
« Reply #13 on: April 18, 2013, 09:47:19 AM »
It might not be exactly rude, but it can feel odd to get a request from a total stranger.

What I find very irritating are friend requests from people who may not be complete strangers (maybe we knew each other many years ago, or went to the same school) who assume I'm supposed to know who they are. I got one request from someone who went to my high school, but we didn't know each other, didn't have mutual friends, and I don't think we ever exchanged a single word. Maybe she's a very nice person, but I don't see the point in connecting with her.

Another request turned out to be someone I had known, but she didn't exactly go out of her way to make that clear to me. She's married, and goes by a name I never knew her by. She has no profile picture, and very little information available on her page if you are not already friends with her. And she sent no message saying "Hi, it's So and so, remember we were in Whatchamacallit club in high school together." I have no idea if she was being ditzy, or just assumed she's so important that I'd know who she was? I was able to figure out who she was based on her friends list and her occupation, but felt rather irked at having to do so. (OK, I didn't have to, but it was going to drive me nuts until I figured out!) So I did find this request somewhat rude.


Yvaine

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Re: Facebook - Friend Requests from People I don't Know
« Reply #14 on: April 18, 2013, 11:09:41 AM »
I have heard that this technique is also used by spammers and other nefarious types.  Did I hear correctly?

Yes, but not exclusively. It's sometimes just friends of friends who want to meet more people. I'd say I get 90% innocent requests and 10% spammers.