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• February 22, 2018, 07:12:32 PM

### Author Topic: But you have a husband...  (Read 15420 times)

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#### lkdrymom

• Member
• Posts: 1246
##### Re: But you have a husband...
« Reply #30 on: April 21, 2013, 01:53:36 PM »
And guess what...sometimes have a spouse is MORE work. You can't just decide on a whim that you want to do something without checking with them first.

#### Bluenomi

• Member
• Posts: 3439
##### Re: But you have a husband...
« Reply #31 on: April 21, 2013, 07:48:04 PM »
'But you have a husband'
'I know, it's hard fitting him in my busy shuedule at times!'

OP was fine, Lisa needs to learn to butt out of things that aren't her business

#### jedikaiti

• Swiss Army Nerd
• Member
• Posts: 2865
• A pie in the hand is worth two in the mail.
##### Re: But you have a husband...
« Reply #32 on: April 21, 2013, 09:05:23 PM »
An invitation is not a summons, and a husband is not a servant.
What part of v_e = \sqrt{\frac{2GM}{r}} don't you understand? It's only rocket science!

"The problem with re-examining your brilliant ideas is that more often than not, you discover they are the intellectual equivalent of saying, 'Hold my beer and watch this!'" - Cindy Couture

#### Fleur

• Member
• Posts: 455
##### Re: But you have a husband...
« Reply #33 on: April 22, 2013, 11:40:37 AM »
An invitation is not a summons, and a husband is not a servant.
[/quote

No?

Joking apart, I agree with everyone else. Lisa was pretty rude, and the OP owed her no explanation.

#### BeagleMommy

• Member
• Posts: 3951
##### Re: But you have a husband...
« Reply #34 on: April 22, 2013, 02:55:26 PM »
Lisa:  ...but you have a husband

OP:  (heavy sigh) Yeah, I do. (eyeroll)

#### bah12

• Member
• Posts: 6942
##### Re: But you have a husband...
« Reply #35 on: April 23, 2013, 09:44:11 AM »
I wonder if one of the reasons people weren't inclined to attend is that it really was sort of an inappropriate celebration. Like, too fancy for the life change; wrong group of people invited, since they're not really THAT close to her; etc.

Or, "it's going to be at a venue that costs \$XX per person, and we're all going to pitch in for the honoree's meal, and a present, and afterwards go drinking and dancing at Some Place.."

Most people I know have limited entertainment budgets, and personally, while I'd like to attend more things, I pick and choose the ones I'm willing to spend money on.

As for "but you have a husband.." I've been at the receiving end of "But you don't have kids" or some such implication that this means I can drop everything and work that extra overtime shift. As the OP pointed out, it's presumptuous to assume anything about another person's obligations. I like the idea of shutting them down with, "Yes, I do have a husband. Like I said, I had other commitments that evening."

So, the event itself wasn't really the issue.  While we do tend to do more lunch time "good-byes" and those definitely get more turnout, it is not completely unusual for someone to arrange for after work drinks instead.  Since I didn't go, I don't know if our ex-coworker's drinks/meal whatever was covered by the attendees or not.

I did not go because the honoree isn't someone I'm very close to, I wasn't overly impressed with the work she did (though it wasn't horrible), and because I had a commtment with my DD.  Had either of the previous two reasons not existed, the third may have been overcome.  I imagine that the others didn't rearrange thier schedules for her for similar reasons as mine.  I do think, in this case, had she wanted a larger turnout, an event during work hours would have gotten it for her.