I've posted about my sister Grace many times before. She can be extremely difficult at times, because she is mentally ill (she's a narcissistic borderline personality with rage issues), but I try my best not to hold it against her. She also has a long, long track record of dating terrible men. At 28, she has been in relationships with two decent men: one left her after she had an emotional affair, and one left her after discovering how she treats me when she's in a rage. She lives about 800 miles away, which has done wonders for our relationship, but leaves a few things lacking.
She has recently started waxing rhapsodical about a new man in her life. She is over the moon about him - starry-eyed, singing his praises, telling me how he's the best thing ever to happen to her. I took this with a grain of salt, as she says this about every new man she dates, and as soon as I could, I consulted her roommate/best friend, Beatrice. Beatrice is fully aware of Grace's mental problems and her dating patterns, so I figured I could get the straight scoop on this new guy. And what Beatrice had to say was less than flattering. Actually, it was much less than flattering - she flat out called him an insincere creep who set off every hinky meter she possessed, and that ever since Grace met him, life with her was becoming unbearable, because he brings out the worst in her. She hates him so much (and how Grace has been acting since they started dating) that she is strongly considering moving out, which would be disastrous for Grace, who relies on Beatrice for health insurance.
Now, I know from experience that telling Grace anything is a bad idea is the worst possible thing you can do. However, I trust Beatrice's judgment as much more sound than Grace's. So what can I do when Grace begins praising her new beau to the sky? I've tried changing the subject, but that's very difficult with a narcissist, even when I try changing the subject to something revolving around her and her life. I've tried wanly telling her I'm happy she's happy, but she's looking for something more effusive than that. It's a sticky situation, and I have no idea what I can do without being rude and betraying Beatrice's confidence.