Author Topic: Stonecold and Potty Parity......  (Read 4468 times)

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Yarnspinner

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Stonecold and Potty Parity......
« on: April 30, 2013, 11:03:31 PM »
Since I messed up a thread about an upcoming family wedding over in Family and Children, at least one person thought it was about Stonecold because of the way I started out wording things....and since Vorfemme (for it was she) wanted to know if it was Stonecold upping the crazy, I told her I would write about Stoney's latest idea about potty parity for the patrons.

In our crumbling mausoleum of a library there are many bathrooms, but only five are for the public and two of them are disgusting.  (The other two, which are in the children's room are not much better, but they are not filthy and falling apart and the drunks don't try to sleep in them.) The fifth bathroom is a unisex handicapped bathroom and it is almost completely inaccessible because it is on the third floor and if the elevators are working (which is often) people are out of luck.

Since we got a large infusion of cash, we had hoped that fixing the bathrooms would be a high priority.  For example, we hoped they would make repairs, put in handicapped stalls and possibly put DOORS on the stalls in the women's room. But instead, the board and Stoney are using the money for....well, we don't know what they are using it for, but it never seems to get into the things that would improve the library.  (For example---we suddenly became the proud owners of $50,000 worth of someone else's used office furniture and cubby divisions.  And half of that was given to several outside groups who have nothing to do with the library except that they are friends of Stonecold.

ANYWAY, we have a patron whom I will call Gladys who is, well, a little bit delusional.  A day without a complaint from Gladys is like a day WITH sunshine.  Her computer doesn't work (it would have worked if she didn't keep hitting the delete button), the man next to her is watching dirty movies (he wasn't), her work didn't print out (because she forgot to hit the print button before she logged out but somehow that's our fault) and so on.

Gladys decided to use the ladies' restroom for the first time ever in her life recently.  She came barreling out screaming about the filth and how her pants were soaked in someone else's urine (they weren't) and how she wanted to talk to the City Librarian about how disgusting it was.

So she was sent upstairs to see Stoney.  No one thought anything would happen because if Stonecold is in the building it's a blue moon outside (seriouisly, sometimes she's gone so long we forget what she looks like)...

Well, Gladys was fortunate in finding Stonecold in.  Stoney immediately escorted her back downstairs and gave the coworker who sent her up a tongue lashing and said "There are six staff bathrooms and you should have escorted poor Mrs. Kravitz to one of those instead of involving me.  You could even have brought her to MY private bathroom.  Think next time!"

So now if a patron complains we have to escort them to one of the few private places we have left.

However, Stonecold's comment that we could bring people to her private bathroom (which has  a shower and other tiny luxuries) has spurred the following question:

"Gee, do you think we should spread around the idea that Stoney's bathroom is open to the public?  I have a list of people I would like to bring in there, whether they want to use the bathroom or not....."

Slartibartfast

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Re: Stonecold and Potty Parity......
« Reply #1 on: April 30, 2013, 11:06:42 PM »
I think you should absolutely start sending people in to her private bathroom.  Maybe stock it with pillows and booze first . . .

diesel_darlin

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Re: Stonecold and Potty Parity......
« Reply #2 on: April 30, 2013, 11:07:40 PM »
I think you should absolutely start sending people in to her private bathroom.  Maybe stock it with pillows and booze first . . .

I second the motion.

Yarnspinner

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Re: Stonecold and Potty Parity......
« Reply #3 on: April 30, 2013, 11:10:02 PM »
Oh, most of these folks will bring their own booze...

Sophia

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Re: Stonecold and Potty Parity......
« Reply #4 on: April 30, 2013, 11:17:12 PM »
So, Yarnspinner, I remember retirement being discussed.  How much longer do you have?

gollymolly2

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Re: Stonecold and Potty Parity......
« Reply #5 on: April 30, 2013, 11:24:11 PM »
I thought stonecold was a man? In any case, he or she has given you the perfect solution. Take patrons to his/her restroom every time. He/she will probably tire of it very soon.

Deetee

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Re: Stonecold and Potty Parity......
« Reply #6 on: May 01, 2013, 02:00:11 AM »
I thought stonecold was a man? In any case, he or she has given you the perfect solution. Take patrons to his/her restroom every time. He/she will probably tire of it very soon.

Yarn spinner mentioned in some long ago thread that she was deliberately changing the gender or deliberately not changing the gender to obscure the identity. So race and gender are sometimes in flux in the stories. The crazy however remains.

eltf177

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Re: Stonecold and Potty Parity......
« Reply #7 on: May 01, 2013, 06:34:45 AM »
Since we got a large infusion of cash, we had hoped that fixing the bathrooms would be a high priority.  For example, we hoped they would make repairs, put in handicapped stalls and possibly put DOORS on the stalls in the women's room. But instead, the board and Stoney are using the money for....well, we don't know what they are using it for, but it never seems to get into the things that would improve the library.  (For example---we suddenly became the proud owners of $50,000 worth of someone else's used office furniture and cubby divisions.  And half of that was given to several outside groups who have nothing to do with the library except that they are friends of Stonecold.

This sounds like outright theft, I can't believe Stonecold could not get fired over something like this. Wait a minute, I've been reading Stonecold stories long enough to know she's not only bulletproof she's kryptonite-resistant!

daen

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Re: Stonecold and Potty Parity......
« Reply #8 on: May 01, 2013, 02:04:59 PM »
I do hope that your retirement gift to the library board is a thorough whistle-blower's package on Stonecold. I gather even an Encyclopedia Britannica of Stoney's antics may not be enough to oust her, but at least you'll know you gave it one last shot.   ;D

MrTango

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Re: Stonecold and Potty Parity......
« Reply #9 on: May 01, 2013, 02:14:18 PM »
I do hope that your retirement gift to the library board is a thorough whistle-blower's package on Stonecold. I gather even an Encyclopedia Britannica of Stoney's antics may not be enough to oust her, but at least you'll know you gave it one last shot.   ;D

In her position, I'd be more inclined to give the whistleblower packet to the local news outlets...  >:D

JenJay

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Re: Stonecold and Potty Parity......
« Reply #10 on: May 01, 2013, 02:16:13 PM »
I do hope that your retirement gift to the library board is a thorough whistle-blower's package on Stonecold. I gather even an Encyclopedia Britannica of Stoney's antics may not be enough to oust her, but at least you'll know you gave it one last shot.   ;D

In her position, I'd be more inclined to give the whistleblower packet to the local news outlets...  >:D

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ITSJUSTME

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Re: Stonecold and Potty Parity......
« Reply #11 on: May 01, 2013, 02:32:50 PM »
DYING to know where your library is . . . oh, and be SURE to escort the sleepy imbibers to her private B&B for a snooze.

ladyknight1

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Re: Stonecold and Potty Parity......
« Reply #12 on: May 01, 2013, 02:59:16 PM »
Oh goodness. Stoney is even better than evil director, who spent over $50K to buy furniture for her office. Turned into quite the news story.  >:D

Fliss

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Re: Stonecold and Potty Parity......
« Reply #13 on: May 02, 2013, 02:53:25 AM »

In this age of photo-phones, surely a little, err . . . annonymous source, could be found to post pics of these sub-standard loos into the public forums. Say, by making a comment on the library twitter account, or their facebook page?

And as we know, once it's out, genies refuse to go back into their bottles.

Just a question, of course . . . merely wondering about a hypothetical situation that MAY occur.
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OSUJillyBean

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Re: Stonecold and Potty Parity......
« Reply #14 on: May 02, 2013, 10:03:33 AM »
I do hope that your retirement gift to the library board is a thorough whistle-blower's package on Stonecold. I gather even an Encyclopedia Britannica of Stoney's antics may not be enough to oust her, but at least you'll know you gave it one last shot.   ;D

In her position, I'd be more inclined to give the whistleblower packet to the local news outlets...  >:D

This is the hardest POD I've ever PODded.

Ditto 100%.