General Etiquette > Family and Children

Between a rock and a hard place (update post 43)

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Last_Dance:
I'm house- and pet-sitting (2 cats and 2 dogs) for my parents: as a consequence, neither I nor my DF have had a full night's sleep in 4 days. It's usually the cats - only this morning, when we were planning to sleep in a bit and get some rest, one of the dogs started whining downstairs.

DF is getting sick of this situation: he already has to wake up earlier than usual to get to work and sooner or later the lack of sleep will affect his performance - which is really bad as he works on commission and has just started establishing himself in his field. Also, my parents scheduled both their vacations at the worst possible time for him.

To make things worse, the dogs are not leash-trained and so cannot be taken anywhere. There's no way my parents would bring the cats along as my mother is terrified they'd run away, so we're stuck at their house.

My parents will not hear of hiring a sitter: they don't trust anyone else with the keys and when I brought up that we might not be doing this much longer, my mother asked me (and I quote): "Don't you think you owe us something?"

The best solution would probably be for my parents to train the dogs and take them along and DF and I would move the cats to our flat - the hard part is actually convince them to do it.

(And that's hoping they don't get Cat n3 back from the shelter - see here for details: http://www.etiquettehell.com/smf/index.php?topic=124998.msg2890520;topicseen#msg2890520
)

I really, really need advice. Your thoughts?   
 

StarFaerie:
1) Children don't owe parents anything IMHO. Parents chose to have the children and with that they got responsibilities. Children didn't choose to be born. I seriously dislike when parents pull this card.

2) If you opt out of this, what will they do? They will have no choice but to train the dogs and then bring the cats to you or get a sitter. And training dogs is a good thing, so it's win-win for the animals. Think of it as training your parents :P

At least that's my opinions.

Oh, and for the current situation, could your husband and you take turns sleeping at your parent's place so at least one of you got a reasonable night's sleep each night?

And I'm adding ((HUGS)) because this sounds really hard.

Nemesis:
Honestly, I would tell them that I love them, but this is not possible.

Just keep saying that it is not possible. The compromise is that you will take the cats, but not the dogs. The dogs are not possible, they either need to cancel their vacation, take their dogs, or get a sitter, or put them in a pet hotel.

If they make suggestions on how you can take the dogs, just keep reiterating, the dogs are not possible, not possible, not possible.

peaches:

--- Quote from: Nemesis on May 01, 2013, 05:12:10 AM ---Honestly, I would tell them that I love them, but this is not possible.


--- End quote ---

That would be my response in the future. If you keep saying it, they will find another solution.

For the time being, I would let DF off the hook (given his job demands) and send him back to the flat to sleep.

YummyMummy66:
My advice is to develop a spine and tell them no.

When they get back from this vacation, I would tell them immediately that you will no longer be babysitting their animals.  They will have to hire a sitter or board them.    Keep saying no time and again.

When she says you owe her, what exactly is she referring to?   I would say to her, well, after this last time, you are paid.  We owe you nothing.

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