One of my in-laws is my friend on facebook. In person she is always really warm and kind to me. However, judging by her facebook posts, she has much more extreme views on things like politics and religion than I would have imagined. She has never brought up these views during our in person interactions, but it's pretty much all she posts about on FB. Because of this I blocked her from viewing my posts, and I blocked hers from showing up in my feed. I check her page once in a while to see how she is doing, and partly out of curiosity because the stuff she posts is pretty out there and kind of fascinating. Unfortunately some of the groups she likes to lambaste are ones that I belong to. I'm pretty sure she's not aware that we have very different religious views, but she definitely knows that my career is in the sciences. She regularly posts things that are anti-my religious views, anti-science, making fun of people with my political affiliation, etc.
Mostly what I am taking from this is that the list of subjects I should avoid around her extends beyond the usual polite avoidance of religion and politics into things like science, mainstream medicine, etc. That's fine, I don't see her often enough for this to be a big deal. However, what I'm having trouble with is reconciling the friendly woman who gives me a big hug hello with the angry person she appears to be on FB - the person who apparently thinks my career is bunk, I'm going to hell, and I'm an idiot because of who I voted for.
Is it rude to keep our interactions more on the side of "civil and brief" rather than "warm and friendly"? I will still accept a hug and such but I don't think it's wise to have an extended 20 minute catch up session because it would be hard to avoid topics like my work, my involvement in the local community (which includes politics), etc. I know this probably makes zero sense but I feel bad that she will notice my keeping my distance and think I'm snubbing her for no clear reason. But on the other hand, she's made it pretty clear what she thinks of People Like Me, and keeping polite distance seems like a natural consequence.
Sorry if this reads a bit neurotic - I certainly have "interesting" relatives on both sides but none as stealth as this woman, all sweetness and light in person and then #*(%&# ANGRY#()*$# on FB!