"If anything, I think they GAIN - they slow down on the way up, hit the top of the trajectory, and then accelerate on the way down."
A bullet fired close enough to vertical to reach an apex trajectory will fall no faster than terminal velocity on the way down due to air resistance. The major danger is that one can fire a bullet at a very steep angle and still have the bullet travel an arc that meets the ground before air resistance slows it to terminal velocity, so the bullet still has lethal speed when it hits whatever's in its way.
"I have to say, this the funniest thing I've seen all day. I totally think there should be a gall bladder fairy."
However, I discovered that it's a really bad idea to find a child who believes that the Tooth Fairy took her tooth after it fell out, and jokingly mention the Eye Fairy. I'm just waiting for the therapy bill....
"I think that people also have the tendency to think that bullets can penetrate, well, people, but not things. Think of how many cop shows you see in which a cop hides behind an open car door while a ton of bullets slam into the door, magically stopped by the (reinforced concrete?) door, leaving the cop in safety to shoot around the sides."
There's a real world exception to this. These days, most police vehicles are reinforced to allow officers to hide behind doors or the body of the car, and they will indeed stop most bullets. Back when it was popular on TV, it was absolutely false, but these days it's much more likely to happen.