Hostesses With The Mostest > Entertaining and Hospitality

Fishing for "was I invited"?

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Lynn2000:
POD. Most likely, you weren't invited, and manager is mistaken (and shouldn't have said anything). There is the possibility the invitation got lost somewhere, of course (I have had that happen), but it's on the bride to follow up with people who haven't responded, if she really needed hard numbers or really wanted to know who was coming. If she doesn't say anything I would assume you aren't invited. After the wedding, you can certainly congratulate her, when it can't in any way, shape, or form be construed as a fishing attempt.

Deetee:
How about you send your coworker an email wishing them all the best for their wedding with just some friendly well wishing chatter and mention that you will be thinking of them fondly this weekend while you are out of town and you will be sure to toast them from wherever you are?

This makes clear you aren't fishing for an invite and on the off chance that there was a lost invite you have made yourlack of attendance clear.

stitchygreyanonymouse:
Thanks everyone. That is what my etiquette-brain was telling me, but then there was that other voice.

*inviteseller:
I am with the others who say you weren't invited and office manager is making assumptions.  For you to say anything to her about it other than congratulations will look like you are fishing.

gellchom:
I'm guessing the two who are attending weren't actually invited, either.

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