General Etiquette > All In A Day's Work

Keeping work and home seperate when they're not. New prob pg3.

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Shoo:

--- Quote from: Alias on June 04, 2013, 11:01:08 AM ---
--- Quote from: Shoo on June 04, 2013, 10:55:57 AM ---I can't imagine why you'd be showing photos of Candy's wedding anyway, but I don't think her request is unreasonable  at all.  She wants to keep her private life private, and that's her business, nobody else's.  It doesn't sound like she's trying to hide her marriage from the company, just from the busy bodies who want to gossip about her.  I don't blame her a bit.

--- End quote ---

That's probably part of why I thought it so odd - it never occurred to me to show my coworker pics of a wedding I'm at (even when they know the groom!) or put them on facebook.

As for keeping it hidden, AFAIK she still has her contact details as her parents house so that they don't have the same address on file.  She won't change her name to his because they 'work together'.  I do think she is trying to keep it hidden.

--- End quote ---


It may be unrealistic, but.....so what?  It's what she wants to do.  I guess I don't understand your question.  There's nothing wrong with her wanting to keep it private.  You keep using the word "hidden" though, and that bothers me a little.  Hidden, private, whatever, it's her relationship and if she doesn't want it advertised to everyone at work, there's absolutely nothing wrong with that.  In fact, I can totally understand WHY she'd want to since she seems to be the topic of gossip and fodder.  As a friend, I think you should support this decision.

lowspark:
I agree. It shouldn't be hard at all to comply with her request. It's what she wants, it's not unreasonable or difficult, so I'd just go along with it.

Realistically, it's inevitable that people will figure out they are married eventually. But that's for her to deal with.

Cz. Burrito:
I think her request is reasonable, if not her expectation that she can keep her marriage quiet.  But that latter bit is up to her to deal with.  I'd honor her request.

Cz. Burrito:

--- Quote from: Alias on June 04, 2013, 11:01:08 AM ---
--- Quote from: Shoo on June 04, 2013, 10:55:57 AM ---I can't imagine why you'd be showing photos of Candy's wedding anyway, but I don't think her request is unreasonable  at all.  She wants to keep her private life private, and that's her business, nobody else's.  It doesn't sound like she's trying to hide her marriage from the company, just from the busy bodies who want to gossip about her.  I don't blame her a bit.

--- End quote ---

That's probably part of why I thought it so odd - it never occurred to me to show my coworker pics of a wedding I'm at (even when they know the groom!) or put them on facebook.

As for keeping it hidden, AFAIK she still has her contact details as her parents house so that they don't have the same address on file.  She won't change her name to his because they 'work together'.  I do think she is trying to keep it hidden.

--- End quote ---

I've seen too many cases of "well, no, I didn't tell them not to do XXX because I never thought they would!"  She's decided that this is important enough to her to cover even the most unlikely of bases.

TurtleDove:

--- Quote from: Alias on June 04, 2013, 10:52:13 AM ---A few people in my area have twigged the relationship and made comments about the groom ‘marrying up’ (the worst I know of is ‘she might come to her senses before the wedding’, basically people have a higher opinion of Candy than her fiancé. They both know this.) 
--- End quote ---

This would really offend me if I were Candy or her groom.  I don't understand while Candy and her groom would tacitly allow such offensive opinions to flourish by giving off the impression Candy is embarrassed of the union.

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