General Etiquette > general

I did a cut direct, and now the person wants to make up Question pg 5

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This dude sounds a little off his rocker.  I think I would just say, "I'm sorry, I'm not interested," and walk away.  I can't really think of any good words to use, but just keep it short and to the point.  "You know what happened and I just can't do that."  "Leave me alone."  I think the most important thing is to be clear and firm.  You have managed to keep yourself separated, and outside of not going to 80s night anymore, continue what you're doing.  Try not to be alone.  If you want to go outside, see if someone would like to join you or grab a smoke when someone else goes out.  I would hate to start anything that may come across as gossip or bashing of anyone's character, but if this guy starts to become more persistent, you might be better off filling in a couple of your friends what's going on with OM so they can help watch out for you.  I hate to leap right into the danger zone, but this seems like a creepy enough situation, I think you need to keep this in mind. 


--- Quote from: cwm on June 05, 2013, 12:41:02 PM ---
--- Quote from: Reader on June 05, 2013, 12:32:04 PM ---Had I realized he had approached me, I would have been more prepared for when he asked me if I wanted to bury the hatchet.
--- End quote ---

Wait, he went crazy on you, made a second FB account to keep attacking you, and now he's asking if YOU want to bury the hatchet? Evil Cwm would mention how upset he was last time I had said I only wanted to be friends, and his mom did warn him about me, has he stopped listening to her? Then again, Evil Cwm has to be locked in a box most of the time, she's not so well-behaved as I'd like.

--- Quote from: MrTango on June 05, 2013, 12:37:11 PM ---Say nothing.  Just walk away.

--- End quote ---

This. Anything you could say would be an invitation to conversation, and seeing as how he's known to already make interesting assumptions about any percieved friendship from your end, it's NOT something worth even responding to. If he talks to you, give him a blank stare and then walk away.

--- End quote ---

I'm with you, cwm, I think the best thing to do is continue to pretend he doesn't exist. If he can willfully mispercieve "I am not interested in anything besides friendship" as "We are now BF/GF," he's not going to hear "I'm sorry, I'm not interested" correctly either. There is no "nice" thing that you can say and not run the risk of his seizing on it as proof of your renewed affections.


--- Quote from: JeseC on June 05, 2013, 01:10:02 PM ---If you must say something, keep it as short as possible.  I might not walk off without saying anything, but I'd keep it to a simple "not interested, please leave me alone."  If he persists, "I SAID 'leave me alone'!"  Mainly for me because I've found a short sentence cuts down on the number of other people who want to help out...

--- End quote ---

Actually, now that I think about it - if it comes to saying the second one, I would make a fuss.  It's worth a very loud "I SAID LEAVE ME ALONE" at this point.  Something that makes it clear that (1) you do not want to engage with him, and (2) he is insisting on trying to bother you anyway.  It seems like it would be in your interest to have attention drawn to his behavior, if he persists.

Ignore him.

Don't reconnect.  Life is too short to put up with that brand of crazy.  Not only that, if you "reconcile" with him, he may take that as a forgiveness of his behavior, and thus see his behavior as something he can repeat again--on you or someone else.

You're already done with him, stay done with him.  Nothing good can come of a reconciliation.


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