I have never understood people - friends or cousins, etc - who go to the hospital to visit after a baby is born. It has always struck me as such a selfish cruel unloving thing to do - its only about the visitors desire to see the baby and fails to respect the new parents. To me, it just seems like such a personal, and exhausting, and overwhelming time. These days I might send a text or FB message, in the past I'd drop a card in the mail to be waiting for them when they got home, but I wait until the people are home to call and certainly to visit.
If I have been caring and supportive and interested prior to the actual birth, I never thought people would consider me uncaring for not immediately rushing out to see them.
I definitely think with over-bearing parents, this couple has the right idea. Their pushy moms created a situation where they have been deemed "stressful" and "unwelcome" - now they can bear the burden of that reputation.
I loved people coming to see me at the hospital after my girls were born. I was thrilled to share my joy. My girls were also born at 26.1 weeks and were in great danger of not making it. The first two weeks we had a dozen visitors to see how we were and to see the babies, including aunts and uncles that hadn't been to visit in years! The day they were born - unexpectedly obviously - several people from my church came to wait at the hospital to lend support. Over the next 4 months, I was able to introduce several friends to the girls and I loved every visit.
It made us feel loved and cared about. I couldn't take my babies to church or to see friends or family. I was so happy people were willing to come visit them in the hospital so I could show them off. They were beautiful to me - even hooked up to IV's, tubes, and looking like scrawny little alien creatures.
If the parents want to wait a week - that's certainly their choice. I couldn't even imagine not telling the grandparents their grandchild was born for a whole week. If I was a grandparent, I couldn't imagine not being told for a week. I would be beyond hurt.
But, I think it really says a lot about the rel
ationship the parents have with their family. To me, their parents better be pretty awful to warrant such treatment. If the rel
ationship wasn't already strained, the PTB better be prepared for it to be. For me though, if I thought my family members were so bad I wouldn't tell them I had a baby for a week, then I probably wouldn't have them in my life at all.