Author Topic: inviting boys to a princess party - should I bother?  (Read 6796 times)

0 Members and 1 Guest are viewing this topic.

Slartibartfast

  • Super Hero!
  • ****
  • Posts: 11879
    • Nerdy Necklaces - my Etsy shop!
inviting boys to a princess party - should I bother?
« on: June 13, 2013, 11:39:29 AM »
Babybartfast has decided she wants a princess party for her 5th birthday next month.  I suspect she wants it just like her best friend's party, but that's not going to happen because a) I wasn't there and b) DH was, but he doesn't remember diddly about the party so he can't help  ::)  Anyway, I think I've got a nice selection of princess-themed activities:

1) making and decorating hobby-horses (foam pool noodle with a cardboard horse's head on the end)

2) magic hunt - each girl gets a plastic magic wand and gets to "ride" her horse around the backyard, looking for "magic rings" (bracelets) which I'll hang from the trees.  Race to see who can get one of each color the fastest.

3) pin the horn on Princess Celestia (unicorn from My Little Pony)

4) drop clothespins in a bottle - not sure what I'll theme this one, maybe dropping gold balls in a well?

5) cake

6) "princess lessons" as time allows - race across the living room balancing books on their heads for good posture, red light / green light, Simon Says, etc.


So I thought I had it all worked out - I've never been a girly-girl, but I'm willing to fake it for one day  :P  But then I asked Babybartfast who she wants to invite*, and it turns out she wants two boys to come.  I don't know either of these boys or their parents, but I have heard Babybartfast talk about playing with them at school over the course of the last year.  (I didn't realize "Taylor" and "Alex" were boys until now.)  I don't mind inviting them, but I'm afraid their parents will see the invitation and assume it's a "invite the whole class" thing and not bother.  And since I'm trying to plan for a smallish party (less than a dozen kids), I don't want to go un-princess the party stuff (much of which I've already bought) if they're not likely to come anyway.

So advice: anyone here have five-year-old boys or remember back to when their sons were five?  Would they have gone to a girl's princess party?  Babybartfast is very definitely in the "this is for girls and that is for boys" phase right now, which we're trying to counteract as much as possible, so it's weird to say "princesses are just for girls."  I'm inclined to tell her we're inviting the boys and just not send the invitations, but figured I'd ask here first . . .


*Babybartfast is starting kindergarten this fall at a new school and we're in a pretty good-sized city, so she's not going to see any of her previous preschool classmates again.  I decided instead of inviting the whole class (which is always awkward), we'll invite a handful of her closest friends and a handful of my friends' daughters with whom Babybartfast will be in Girl Scouts this fall.

Betelnut

  • Hero Member
  • ***
  • Posts: 3830
Re: inviting boys to a princess party - should I bother?
« Reply #1 on: June 13, 2013, 11:45:33 AM »
Call it a "Princess and Knight Party!" or "Princess and Prince Party!"  Maybe that will be less girly for the boys.
Native Texan, Marylander currently

BeagleMommy

  • Hero Member
  • ***
  • Posts: 3259
Re: inviting boys to a princess party - should I bother?
« Reply #2 on: June 13, 2013, 11:49:04 AM »
Have the boys be "knights in shining armour".  They can still do the activities (well, maybe not the princess lessons, but it could be a good time to teach them "chivalry" (aka manners)).

Pick up two plastic swords from a novelty store.  Have them turn their hobby horses into "gallant steeds".  Have some gold and/or silver paint and decorations on hand so they're not stuck using the pinks/pastels that the girls are using.

Slartibartfast

  • Super Hero!
  • ****
  • Posts: 11879
    • Nerdy Necklaces - my Etsy shop!
Re: inviting boys to a princess party - should I bother?
« Reply #3 on: June 13, 2013, 11:50:06 AM »
Call it a "Princess and Knight Party!" or "Princess and Prince Party!"  Maybe that will be less girly for the boys.

Oh, I have no problem calling it a "Princess (and Prince) party" - I'm just wondering whether the pink hobby-horses, collecting bracelets, etc. stuff would be too much.  Plus half the fun will be for the girls to be girly - if there are boys there, I suspect I'd have to tone that down.

Betelnut

  • Hero Member
  • ***
  • Posts: 3830
Re: inviting boys to a princess party - should I bother?
« Reply #4 on: June 13, 2013, 11:55:33 AM »
Call it a "Princess and Knight Party!" or "Princess and Prince Party!"  Maybe that will be less girly for the boys.

Oh, I have no problem calling it a "Princess (and Prince) party" - I'm just wondering whether the pink hobby-horses, collecting bracelets, etc. stuff would be too much.  Plus half the fun will be for the girls to be girly - if there are boys there, I suspect I'd have to tone that down.

I actually think the hobby-horse idea will be a big hit with the boys--if you make the horses blue/brown and if there other things to collect besides bracelets.  The boys will use some of their "manly" energy out by running around on their horses.   All of your games can be made less feminine so I think you are fine.  Even "princess lessons" (balancing books) could be fun but the boys may feel weird if you call them that.  But if you make it a competition, they will love it.

The party sounds like a lot of fun.
« Last Edit: June 13, 2013, 02:23:17 PM by Betelnut »
Native Texan, Marylander currently

Tea Drinker

  • Hero Member
  • ***
  • Posts: 1511
  • Now part of Team Land Crab
Re: inviting boys to a princess party - should I bother?
« Reply #5 on: June 13, 2013, 12:23:27 PM »
Yes, invite them. Some boys like to play princesses, if nobody tells them that they aren't allowed to because that's only for girls. Tell everyone that it's a princess party, and her friends (and/or their parents) can decide if that's something they want to do. It's also possible that one of the girls will decline, because she doesn't want to play princesses, and if she's pushed into doing so, that's going to be a bit of a downer for everyone.

If you have contact information for the boys' parents, you could call/email/etc. and tell them something like "we're having a small party for my daughter's birthday, just her good friends, and she'd like your son to be there." "A small party" could be four children or ten, but not inviting the whole class.
Any advice that requires the use of a time machine may safely be ignored.

*inviteseller

  • Hero Member
  • ***
  • Posts: 1821
  • I am Queen Mommy
Re: inviting boys to a princess party - should I bother?
« Reply #6 on: June 13, 2013, 12:24:24 PM »
As the mom of a 'everything is pink and princess' girl, I say because it is only 2 boys, don't invite.  If you had even numbers of boys and girls, you could pull it off, but just 2 boys and the rest girls I don't think it will work.  The girls will overwhelm the boys with the princess stuff.

Isilleke

  • Jr. Member
  • *
  • Posts: 95
Re: inviting boys to a princess party - should I bother?
« Reply #7 on: June 13, 2013, 12:36:25 PM »
I'd say go for it and maybe also ask the parents? I know that my nephew sometimes says he's a princess himself. Maybe these boys' parents also don't like the divide and want them to do something very "girly".

DoubleTrouble

  • Hero Member
  • ***
  • Posts: 1357
Re: inviting boys to a princess party - should I bother?
« Reply #8 on: June 13, 2013, 12:49:56 PM »
I've got twin 4-almost-5-year-old boys & they would love a princess party! Sofia & Tinkerbell are some of their favorite characters & if they got invited to one I think they would die of happiness :) I say invite the boys & let the parent decide.

Sheila Take a Bow

  • Member
  • **
  • Posts: 781
  • Formerly arija but I felt like a name change.
Re: inviting boys to a princess party - should I bother?
« Reply #9 on: June 13, 2013, 01:11:35 PM »
Go ahead and invite them.  My tomboyish best friend (mother of three tomboys) thinks it's ridiculous that girls get invited to "boy"-themed parties all the time without question, but that it's somehow wrong to invite a boy to a princess party.

And I've been to princess parties that boys have attended.  They've just had knight-themed activities (and they didn't stop girls from doing the knight-themed stuff or boys from doing princessy things).  For the most part, the boys couldn't have cared less about the girly things going on around them.

My own daughter is having a fairy and pirate party next month, so I know how hard it is to try to balance what your kid wants with what her friends will want.  (But we won't have too many activities at my daughter's party, since it will be at a park with a splash pad and I'm pretty sure that the kids won't care about anything but the splash pad.)

cwm

  • Hero Member
  • ***
  • Posts: 2427
Re: inviting boys to a princess party - should I bother?
« Reply #10 on: June 13, 2013, 01:16:27 PM »
Invite them. Almost all of the games that you picked can be very "manly" by a change of a few words and colors. And you may find that one or bot of those boys doesn't mind the princess stuff, and one or two of the girls is all into the prince or knight stuff.

As a little girl, if I had been invited to a princess party, I would have passed. I've always identified with the knights more. And Shining Armor is so much better than Princess Celestia or Princess Cadance.  ::)

amylouky

  • Hero Member
  • ***
  • Posts: 1567
Re: inviting boys to a princess party - should I bother?
« Reply #11 on: June 13, 2013, 01:56:44 PM »
I've got twin 4-almost-5-year-old boys & they would love a princess party! Sofia & Tinkerbell are some of their favorite characters & if they got invited to one I think they would die of happiness :) I say invite the boys & let the parent decide.

POD.. I've got a 4 and 5 year old and they LOVE Sofia, and the princesses. They might not wear a pink princess tiara, and they'd probably rather have a brown hobby horse than a pink or purple one, but otherwise I think they'd have a blast.

CrazyDaffodilLady

  • Hero Member
  • ***
  • Posts: 1368
Re: inviting boys to a princess party - should I bother?
« Reply #12 on: June 13, 2013, 04:01:35 PM »
Your list of activities is not all that girly if you turn down the princess angle a bit.  A good example is how you called the bracelets "magic rings". 

Perhaps instead of "princess lessons", you could offer "royalty lessons".  Princess Kate's due date is July 13; maybe you'll get lucky and she'll pop right before your party, and you can link your party to the news.  For example, you could say, "Let's practice some of the things the royal baby will have to learn to become king or queen some day".  Instead of "Simon Says" you can play "The Queen Says". 

It takes two people to play tug of war. If you don't want to play, don't pick up the rope.

sweetonsno

  • Hero Member
  • ***
  • Posts: 1429
Re: inviting boys to a princess party - should I bother?
« Reply #13 on: June 13, 2013, 04:08:53 PM »
Invite the boys and let the parents know that your daughter wanted to have them come specifically so they don't think it was an "invite the whole class" sort of thing.

I vote for having a few non-pink/purple horses around. It would be good for the boys if they aren't into the more girly things, and good for the girls who are a bit more tomboyish.

Instead of calling them "Princess Lessons," why not call them "Royalty Lessons" or "Court Contests"? That would include princesses, princes, and knights.

Maybe add a game of Dragon Freeze Tag in which the knights have to rescue the princesses or something.

Amanita

  • Hero Member
  • ***
  • Posts: 1454
  • San Francisco I miss you!
Re: inviting boys to a princess party - should I bother?
« Reply #14 on: June 13, 2013, 04:10:39 PM »
Invite them. Almost all of the games that you picked can be very "manly" by a change of a few words and colors. And you may find that one or bot of those boys doesn't mind the princess stuff, and one or two of the girls is all into the prince or knight stuff.

As a little girl, if I had been invited to a princess party, I would have passed. I've always identified with the knights more. And Shining Armor is so much better than Princess Celestia or Princess Cadance.  ::)

That was me alright! I would have vastly preferred to be a knight than a princess. So I think if you give guests a choice of which they would rather be instead of dividing it along strict gender lines, I think you'll be fine.