Somebody mentioned the reaction they notice from people when regular peanut butter and jelly is specifically termed as vegetarian peanut butter and jelly. If somebody referred to regulat old Jif and Welch's Grape Jelly they might get a strange reaction from me, not because I felt like there was something wrong with the sandwich but because going out of the way to use the term "vegetarian" would make be a bit wary. I would wonder what point they felt they had to prove or what agenda they wanted to promote.
Speaking as a non-vegetarian here -
I know that vegetarians pay more attention to what's in their food than I do. I enjoy being able to just buy what tastes good and not worry about what exactly is in it. Because of that, when someone specifies "vegetarian grilled cheese" or "vegetarian PB & J," I don't know
if that's the "normal" kind or whether there's some weird non-vegetarian element of my "normal" sandwich. I tend to assume that if a "normal" grilled cheese was vegetarian they wouldn't need to specify, though, so it stands to reason a "vegetarian" grilled cheese probably has some strange-to-me substitutions, like vegan cheese or lard-free bread or whatnot. I don't know - I'm not usually keeping that close an eye on the source of the ingredients
So if people seem a bit wary about perfectly normal food being labeled "vegetarian," that's why. I'd probably avoid "100% guaranteed asbestos-free!" breakfast cereal as well, on the same principle
That said, LadyL, I would encourage you to include at least a few "normal" (to omnivores) menu items along with the more unusual ones. It's hard to judge whether you'll like completely new-to-you items like flax crust or cashew cheese, and (depending on the environment) it could be awkward for people to commit to an entree only to find out they don't like the vegan substitutions for whatever ingredients they're used to. Hopefully the inclusion of things like "normal" fruit salad, etc. will help your anti-vegan friends and relatives from feeling too out of their depth.