Just because it would be a "thing" in your circle of friends doesn't make it generally a good idea for a gift.
Obviously there is a lot of diversity of gift giving all over the planet and certain things are more acceptable in one group than another, but it is really apparent that in this particular circle it was decidedly not a "thing."
But, particularly for a formal event. Presumably if the B&G are spending $100/plate this is not a casual BBQ in the backyard.
I still stand by it being generally tacky to give something more suited to a "welcome to the neighborhood gift" as a wedding gift. And while it is never OK to not accept a gift graciously, it doesn't make it right.
Its interesting that in defending this basket that people think that they will use the basket forever--many of those baskets are just for looks unless you pay even more--and we could probably discuss the appropriateness of a basket for both a man and a woman as a wedding gift--that is really taste specific.
In this case, it was obviously the gift basket of edibles that was the gift--not a fine basket.
If you don't know that your gift is on target for a particular couple, you should stick with more traditional fare- something off the registry, a gift card to the place they are registered or cash.
Also, a note on "just clicking"--these baskets can be bought by "just clicking" the same as a place setting or a toaster. It's not so much the effort and thought that is put into the gift as what it says. This one was cutesy.
You are making an awful lot of blanket pronouncements from on high about The Way Things Are Donetm. What Queen or deity decided:
1) That wedding gifts are required to have gravitas. What's wrong with being cutesy? Is there no joy, no whimsy to be had in the world? Or perhaps you believe whimsy and joy are inappropriate for celebrating marriages - how sad. Anyway, how much gravitas does a toaster or a George Foreman grill have?
2) That giving a basket is only acceptable if it is a Fine Basket. Seriously?
3) That consumable items are inherently inappropriate. Money is essentially consumable, and we give that all the time. And dang, but this gift requires a lot more thought and effort than writing a check for the same value. And to conclude, as you implied in an earlier post, that a gift of consumables reflects the giver's philosophy on marriage - the hyperbolic judgment required for that leap is remarkable.
4) That this gift is 'more suited to a welcome to the neighborhood' or 'only appropriate for a casual backyard BBQ. I don't even know how you make this determination.
5) That it is inappropriate to wish the couple 'to enjoy life'. What a bitter and judgmental view of things, that simply telling someone 'to enjoy life' on occasion of their wedding might be met with such derision and scorn.
In short, I agree with a prior poster that this view is narrow minded. I also think the extraordinary judgment being laid down, simply because this gift does not meet your personal standards for How Wedding Gifts Are Supposed To Be is arrogant and mean-spirited.
Since when did ehell become a place where insulting other posters was appropriate? Should I even bother to read what you have written when you start off by insulting me? I have opinions just like anyone else here. The way that I express them isn't any different from the way that anyone else expresses theirs, including yours, except here, instead of discussing a topic --instead of giving your opinion on a TOPIC, you are discussing ME.
I am not the topic. What you are doing is very inappropriate!
On the contrary, I am in no way discussing you as a person. What I *am* doing is taking serious issue with the way that you state your personal opinions
on what makes a good wedding present. I am taking issue with the insulting and scornful way you have approached this topic, and the other people discussing it.
And no, there is actually a difference between the way that you state your opinions and how others do. Where other people say things like "I prefer to give wedding gifts that last longer" or even the more strongly worded "In my circle, generally people expect wedding gifts to have more durability", you have seemed hell bent on declaring your personal opinions as blanket rules that apply to all and sundry, and that anything that violates them is tacky, rude, and inappropriate. You have, in doing so, insulted everyone in this thread who has defended this gift or ever given anything like it that violates your personal wedding gift rules
of gravitas, durability, and formality.