But ... But ... It's Not Like It's Work! (Craft Freebies)

[VorFemme]

<background>I'm an IT person.  I have been doing technical support for years.  For the most part, I don't mind when friends ask me to take a look at something.  Often, it's a 5 minute max sort of fix and it would have cost them $100+ to take it into a local shop.  To me, they are my friends and often my hosts and it's well within the boundaries of our friendship.  If it's a serious thing that takes me more than ten minutes or so I usually get a bottle of wine or a nice lunch out of it.  They are always gracious when it's something I can't fix or something I can't fix right away (it needs a part or something).  Most follow my advice and take decent care of their machines so most fixes are one time only.  This has been going on for years.  </background>

My mother recently moved to the same state I am in and got together with a man with a large family, most of which is local to him.  He makes her happy and is a nice man.

My husband and I went over for Christmas.  It started with a quick 'would you look at my computer, I think Niece downloaded something again'.  She did, I fixed it.  Then 'would you take a look at Boyfriend's laptop, it's been slow'.  Two hours and three computers later, I find his kids are now bringing over their computers for me to look at.  They were nice about it, certainly, and apologetic when they realized they'd all had the same idea of 'oh, hey, GG is going to be there maybe I'll bring the laptop over and see if she can't take a quick look.'

But for the love of Pete, at one point, I had a stack of 8 laptops.

I ended up showing the tech savvy teen how to fix the most common issue and turned her loose, telling her it was absolutely okay to blackmail aunts and uncles with demands for jewelry before solving their 'way to many background programs running' issue, and watching her eyes light up with avarice.  The aforementioned aunts and uncles were a bit annoyed at the teen until I pointed out they could pay her in $5 charms for her bracelet, or cough up my '50% discounted for friends and family' rate of $40 an hour.

I'm getting paid for the one that actually requires professional attention, and the other that required professional attention belonged to my niece and is mine until she's no longer grounded due to me uncovering the reasons it required professional attention.  Once her grounding is done, it will be returned to her locked down with parental controls and a password that requires her to pay homage to her awesome aunt everytime she wants to log in.

***snerk***

I think I just inhaled the whipped cream from my hot chocolate....

++++++++

I am not a trained tech support person nor do I play on in commercials.

I have learned how to change out RAM, hard drives, and a few other simple "fixes" as well as learned which freeware programs work for a LOT of quick fixes (update drivers - Driver Booster from Iobit.com; Malware Defender & a couple of other programs from the same site; CCleaner from Piriform.com; and a YouTube series of "fixes" from - dang that website is in the Favorites on my other computer - a guy with a business doing it and a series of videos on shareware or cheap fixes to keep your computer running well - the above list & MalwareBytes and a couple of others that don't come to mind at the moment).

I've even swapped out a screen on a laptop (overpowered graphics card burning it out from the middle out in vertical strips) and a cell phone (VorGuy dropped his two week old phone in the parking lot and it got run over - the only thing that quit working was the screen).  But when my graphics card died in a used laptop - I was extremely glad to find out that I could get the previous owner's registration data from the refurbisher, transfer the warranty & registration to my name, and qualified for a free repair under an extended warranty)....that involved a clean room & soldering equipment that I don't know how to use or have.

[MommyPenguin]

I ended up showing the tech savvy teen how to fix the most common issue and turned her loose, telling her it was absolutely okay to blackmail aunts and uncles with demands for jewelry before solving their 'way to many background programs running' issue, and watching her eyes light up with avarice.  The aforementioned aunts and uncles were a bit annoyed at the teen until I pointed out they could pay her in $5 charms for her bracelet, or cough up my '50% discounted for friends and family' rate of $40 an hour.

I'm getting paid for the one that actually requires professional attention, and the other that required professional attention belonged to my niece and is mine until she's no longer grounded due to me uncovering the reasons it required professional attention.  Once her grounding is done, it will be returned to her locked down with parental controls and a password that requires her to pay homage to her awesome aunt everytime she wants to log in.

lol, this is great!  I love how you trained a replacement.  And yes, helping other people with things, especially if the amount of help is likely to be frequent and take some time, is worth some sort of repayment!  Just like babysitting or anything else, unless the person *chooses* to offer the service for free occasionally.

And wow at the niece.  Sounds like at least the parents are taking charge there, which sounds like a good thing in that case!

[siamesecat2965]

I am not an IT person but I know enough to be dangerous. The only person I will help is my mom, mainly because she tries to learn, not simply let me show her. Her stuff is more along the lines if my limited Excel knowledge and help with Word. She takes notes and insists I show her so she can do it. Did I mention she's almost 79?

[LadyClaire]

One of my hobbies is metalsmithing. I make jewelry. Dragons are kind of my specialty, and I have a particular necklace that's very time consuming to make because it's a bunch of little pieces that have to be cut and carefully soldered together. I sell this necklace for $80 as a made-to-order piece.

Last year my sister-in-law (DH's half sister) contacted him and asked how much one of those would be for "a sister-in-law", and was told "the same price that they are for everyone". I was annoyed at the time that she'd ask for a discount, especially since we never see her. She lives in another state and I've met her exactly once, very briefly, but we're facebook friends. I was also irritated she asked my DH about it. He explained to her that the necklaces take several hours to make, plus the cost of materials, and no, they cannot be sold for any cheaper.

Yesterday she sent me a message asking if I had any of those necklaces already made. I told her no, since they're so time consuming it makes more sense financially to just make them when someone places an order for one. So then she said "I'd really like one but can only pay $50".

I took a while to respond and about half an hour later when I hadn't said anything, another message pops up "sorry if I offended or aggravated you I won't ask again".

I told her that I simply can't do a discount. The pieces take so long to make that it just wasn't possible.

I'm hoping that she has accepted that and won't come back again in a few months or another year to ask for a discount again.

[ladyknight1]

Oh, yes. The I'm special and should not have to pay the same rate as a stranger ploy.

Doesn't work on me either. I make very intricate beaded jewelry, and require half the payment up front before I will order the supplies. I used to make pieces as gifts, but stopped for my sisters and mother as I kept getting complaints. My best friend and I exchange jewelry pieces as she is more into wire work than beading.

[southern girl]

My sister-in-law makes beautiful wire wrap jewelry.  I have bought some pieces from her (at her market price) but if I want something special, I ask for it for Christmas.  I pick colors, she picks the stone and the design.  It works for us.

[LadyClaire]

Oh, yes. The I'm special and should not have to pay the same rate as a stranger ploy.

Doesn't work on me either. I make very intricate beaded jewelry, and require half the payment up front before I will order the supplies. I used to make pieces as gifts, but stopped for my sisters and mother as I kept getting complaints. My best friend and I exchange jewelry pieces as she is more into wire work than beading.

It just really bothers me that she asked twice for a discount. Once someone tells you "no", that should be it. I'm hoping that the second time is the charm.

I don't often make pieces as gifts, either. I will with beadwoven stuff, but not with the metalwork.

[NyaChan]

Oh, yes. The I'm special and should not have to pay the same rate as a stranger ploy.

Doesn't work on me either. I make very intricate beaded jewelry, and require half the payment up front before I will order the supplies. I used to make pieces as gifts, but stopped for my sisters and mother as I kept getting complaints. My best friend and I exchange jewelry pieces as she is more into wire work than beading.

It just really bothers me that she asked twice for a discount. Once someone tells you "no", that should be it. I'm hoping that the second time is the charm.

I don't often make pieces as gifts, either. I will with beadwoven stuff, but not with the metalwork.

Yeah, the first time I could kind of let go of because sometimes people just don't understand what they are really asking you to do in terms of money and time, but to do it twice and then change people as if she was hoping she could get around each of you for the result she wanted?  No redemption there. 

[Lynn2000]

POD! She could have said, "I love those dragon necklaces you make, but I can only spend $50. Is there a smaller/less intricate version you could make?" In other words tried to work with you to find a solution you both liked. Or saved up for the full price.

I always think those "obvious" discount reasons are funny... "Oh, you're my sister-in-law? I'd forgotten! Of course you can get a discount for that!"

[goldilocks]

You know - I always pay more if I'm family!   why would I want a family member to make less money on me?

I have a young relative starting his own lawn business.   No way would I dream of asking him to give me a discount, when I can afford his full price, and knowing he can't really afford to give me one.   As a matter of fact, when I pay him, I usually "round up" and give him a little more.

[TootsNYC]

Yeah, I've been frustrated sometimes, actually, w/ friends or family -offering- a discount.

I want to support your business. How is it supporting your business if you make less profit?

And, if you give me a discount, what happens if I'm not really happy with the end result--will you come back and fix it for me, or will you be crabby I asked you to, since you gave me a discount?

What I want, in terms of extra consideration for a friend/family member is the assurance of an honest job of high quality. (Which you should give to everyone, but since I know you, I am trusting that I won't have to worrya bout it the way I might w/ someone else.)

[jaxsue]

This isn't craft-related, but it does fit the gist of this thread.

My X-DH is a bagpiper. He has played for almost 30 yrs. He has spent a couple thousand dollars for his kit (his kilt, etc.) and his bagpipes. It's amazing how many people want him to play for free. FTR, he will play for free for certain events, such as graveside services for friends/relatives and weddings for family members. But it's very SS when people want him to play for free for a wedding (someone he doesn't even know). They're paying the florist, minister, the caterer, but the musicians have to do it for nothing? Oookay. 

[Dindrane]

I think it's okay to want a family member discount if the relationship overall involves an equal amount of give and take. Like if I always babysit someone's children for cheap, I'd appreciate it if they made me some craft item I wanted for less than they'd normally charge.

But even then, I think it's a little awkward to ask about it. To use my example, I wouldn't babysit someone's kids for cheap (or free) unless I was happy to do it without further compensation. If that person never did anything of equal consideration for me ever, or I felt that I was being taken advantage of, I'd probably just be less available...but I wouldn't ask them to give me some other good or service for cheap/free to make up for it. Mostly because it wouldn't make up for it, and it would be awkward to boot.

I also think the family member discount means you have to be willing to accept the family member timeline as well. I'm pretty slow to finish most craft projects, because I do them in my not-especially-extensive free time, and because I have a lot of things that put demands on said free time. It's one of the primary reasons I've never seriously considered trying to sell the things I make, because then I'd have to start and finish them in a reasonable timeline. When it's a gift that is free, "when I get around to it" is plenty fast enough, and "when I feel like working on it" is an acceptable speed. But if someone has paid me, that stops being true, and I feel like I have more of an obligation to devote time to the project that I'd rather spend doing something else.

[GreenEyedHawk]

I was reminded of this just today...see, when I am going to groom my own dogs, I might contact a couple very close friends and ask them if they want theirs done as well, since I'm set up for it.  But I do not want every friend-of-friend or distant relation or anyone popping up and asking me (or even worse, telling me) that their dog needs grooming, and since that's "my thing" I shouldn't mind doing it, right?  Never mind that it's my shampoo, my water, my towels, my time, and wear and tear on my tools, and you're expecting me to work for free?  Yes, I used to do this for a living, but to be honest I don't even really enjoy doing my own dogs anymore...I just do because it needs doing and I'm broke.  If I could afford it, you better believe I'd be paying someone else.

So, short answer is no.  I will not groom your dog.  Ever.  And DEFINITELY not for free.

I have one friend whose dog I will groom at no charge, but we also have kind of a deal; she is a professional makeup artist and has been teaching the MOST incompetent person in the world about the basics of makeup. (the incompetent?  That would be me.)  She takes the time and helps me while using her own supplies, so I consider it to be fair trade.  Plus, her dog Rollo is one of my favourites.  He is cute and friendly and I'm always happy to have him visit.  Other people, not so much.  Especially not those who assume I like spending my weekends in wet, soapy clothes, smelling like a wet dog and covered in hair for free.

[LadyClaire]

I think it's okay to want a family member discount if the relationship overall involves an equal amount of give and take. Like if I always babysit someone's children for cheap, I'd appreciate it if they made me some craft item I wanted for less than they'd normally charge.

But even then, I think it's a little awkward to ask about it. To use my example, I wouldn't babysit someone's kids for cheap (or free) unless I was happy to do it without further compensation. If that person never did anything of equal consideration for me ever, or I felt that I was being taken advantage of, I'd probably just be less available...but I wouldn't ask them to give me some other good or service for cheap/free to make up for it. Mostly because it wouldn't make up for it, and it would be awkward to boot.

I also think the family member discount means you have to be willing to accept the family member timeline as well. I'm pretty slow to finish most craft projects, because I do them in my not-especially-extensive free time, and because I have a lot of things that put demands on said free time. It's one of the primary reasons I've never seriously considered trying to sell the things I make, because then I'd have to start and finish them in a reasonable timeline. When it's a gift that is free, "when I get around to it" is plenty fast enough, and "when I feel like working on it" is an acceptable speed. But if someone has paid me, that stops being true, and I feel like I have more of an obligation to devote time to the project that I'd rather spend doing something else.

My biggest issue is that I barely know her. I've met her once, in the entire time I've known my husband (15+ years). She lives in another state and is quite a bit older than DH, so he didn't really grow up with her or have a close relationship. I don't think she even sent us a "congratulations" card when we got married, and our relationship doesn't go beyond the occasional "hi" on Facebook.