Author Topic: What to do with an unwanted re-gift? Re-gift it?  (Read 3419 times)

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jpcher

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What to do with an unwanted re-gift? Re-gift it?
« on: June 24, 2013, 08:14:11 PM »
AKA: Can you donate alcohol? ::)

MIL (from out of state) came over the other day for a luncheon. She presented me with a gift of a bottle of red wine (Cabernet Sauvignon) which I thanked her for.

Once I started serving drinks, I offered MIL (and other guests) a glass of the Cabernet that she brought. She said "Oh. No. I don't drink red wines. They give me a headache. Someone gave me that bottle a week ago and I just figured that you might find a use for it. I'd like a glass of white wine if you have it." Which I did, her preferred pinot grigio.


I do have a dinner party coming up. I know the hosts don't drink wine, but some of their guests do (I honestly don't remember what type of wine they've served in the past.) Would it be okay to re-gift this re-gift to them? (I don't owe them a hostess gift, we reciprocate with meals, so it might seem a bit odd showing up with a bottle of wine.)


What is the polite thing to do with this re-gifted bottle of wine? What would you do?

TootsNYC

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Re: What to do with an unwanted re-gift? Re-gift it?
« Reply #1 on: June 24, 2013, 08:25:29 PM »
Serve it at a dinner party. Give it away to someone else.

It is now YOUR asset, just as your cash is your asset, and you might use that asset to purchase some other asset to give as a gift or seve at dinner, or whatever.

This just cuts out a step.

Your MIL gave you an asset, and if you would have otherwise taken wine to this dinner, now you have something you can use instead, and you've saved the $X that you'd have spent.

Or you can find anybody else that you think might want it, and give it to them.

nutraxfornerves

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Re: What to do with an unwanted re-gift? Re-gift it?
« Reply #2 on: June 24, 2013, 08:28:59 PM »
I wouldn't bring the bottle as a gift to people who don't drink wine. The proper way to gift wine is to make it clear that you are not expecting the hosts to serve it, but rather to enjoy it at their leisure. "Here is something you can serve to guests," to me, implies "I hate the stuff you've been providing. Hint, hint."

You could pass it on to someone who will understand what happened and perhaps laugh, but as a casual deal, not connected with hospitality. "We got this as a gift from someone and it's not a wine we like. Can you use it?"

You can cook with it. A decent Cab should make a good boeuf bourguignon (or just call it "beef stew") or coq au vin.

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gellchom

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Re: What to do with an unwanted re-gift? Re-gift it?
« Reply #3 on: June 24, 2013, 09:49:17 PM »
Serve it at a dinner party. Give it away to someone else.

It is now YOUR asset, just as your cash is your asset, and you might use that asset to purchase some other asset to give as a gift or seve at dinner, or whatever.

This just cuts out a step.

Your MIL gave you an asset, and if you would have otherwise taken wine to this dinner, now you have something you can use instead, and you've saved the $X that you'd have spent.

Or you can find anybody else that you think might want it, and give it to them.
This, exactly.

Bijou

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Re: What to do with an unwanted re-gift? Re-gift it?
« Reply #4 on: June 25, 2013, 12:35:40 AM »
AKA: Can you donate alcohol? ::)

MIL (from out of state) came over the other day for a luncheon. She presented me with a gift of a bottle of red wine (Cabernet Sauvignon) which I thanked her for.

Once I started serving drinks, I offered MIL (and other guests) a glass of the Cabernet that she brought. She said "Oh. No. I don't drink red wines. They give me a headache. Someone gave me that bottle a week ago and I just figured that you might find a use for it. I'd like a glass of white wine if you have it." Which I did, her preferred pinot grigio.


I do have a dinner party coming up. I know the hosts don't drink wine, but some of their guests do (I honestly don't remember what type of wine they've served in the past.) Would it be okay to re-gift this re-gift to them? (I don't owe them a hostess gift, we reciprocate with meals, so it might seem a bit odd showing up with a bottle of wine.)


What is the polite thing to do with this re-gifted bottle of wine? What would you do?
Use it for cooking or give it away to someone I know will like it.  No special occasion, just give it to them..."Someone gave this bottle of wine to me but I can't use it.  Would you like to have it?"
I've never knitted anything I could recognize when it was finished.  Actually, I've never finished anything, much to my family's relief.

veryfluffy

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Re: What to do with an unwanted re-gift? Re-gift it?
« Reply #5 on: June 25, 2013, 04:08:27 AM »
Is there a hurry to get rid of it?

A bottle of wine is just a bottle of wine -- it will keep happily until the right occasion for opening it, or bringing it along to someone else, presents itself.

   

alkira6

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Re: What to do with an unwanted re-gift? Re-gift it?
« Reply #6 on: June 25, 2013, 08:56:17 AM »
Or open it and make red wine vinegar and use it to make salad dressing.

Outdoor Girl

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Re: What to do with an unwanted re-gift? Re-gift it?
« Reply #7 on: June 25, 2013, 09:22:24 AM »
Call the hosts of the upcoming dinner party and explain.  'My Mom gave me a bottle of Cab because red wine gives her headaches and I don't drink a lot of red, either.  Would it go with what you are planning on serving next week?  I'd be happy to donate it to the cause, if it will.'
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TootsNYC

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Re: What to do with an unwanted re-gift? Re-gift it?
« Reply #8 on: June 25, 2013, 09:30:40 AM »
You also can absolutely give it to someone as a gift and NEVER tell them that it is a regift.

It's your asset. It doesn't matter that it was once owned by someone else.

All that matters is that you feel confident the person you're giving it to will like it.
And that you never reveal it was a regift, since it makes people feel hinky.

I'm wondering if your MIL told you it was a regift as a way to explain why she brought you something you probably wouldn't like.

As for the dinner party, you could call them and say, "Hey, were you going to buy wine to serve to other people at the dinner? If you haven't bought it yet, could I contribute it?"

z_squared82

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Re: What to do with an unwanted re-gift? Re-gift it?
« Reply #9 on: June 25, 2013, 09:39:36 AM »
You also can absolutely give it to someone as a gift and NEVER tell them that it is a regift.

It's your asset. It doesn't matter that it was once owned by someone else.

All that matters is that you feel confident the person you're giving it to will like it.
And that you never reveal it was a regift, since it makes people feel hinky.

I'm wondering if your MIL told you it was a regift as a way to explain why she brought you something you probably wouldn't like.

As for the dinner party, you could call them and say, "Hey, were you going to buy wine to serve to other people at the dinner? If you haven't bought it yet, could I contribute it?"

That.

Also, party planners say you can bring a bottle as a hostess gift, but never expect the hotess to serve it on the spot because it might not pair with the food they planned.  Give it as a hostess gift, don't mention that it was a regift, think nothing more about it. Or keep it until you have a party and put it out then. It's not at all uncommon I am gifted with wines I don't like (I'm looking at you, merlot). I save them for when my friends come over.

lowspark

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Re: What to do with an unwanted re-gift? Re-gift it?
« Reply #10 on: June 25, 2013, 09:49:42 AM »

What is the polite thing to do with this re-gifted bottle of wine? What would you do?

I'd drink it. But if you don't want to do that, then it's fine to give it as a gift or hostess gift to someone who drinks red wine. I agree with Toots that it is now yours to do with as you please.

I wouldn't give it to someone who doesn't drink wine, though. I think it's odd to give someone a gift that you know they won't use/like.


rose red

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Re: What to do with an unwanted re-gift? Re-gift it?
« Reply #11 on: June 25, 2013, 10:03:02 AM »
I'd give it to someone who may like it.  If I don't know anyone and I have room to store it, I'd save it to give someone at Christmas.  Maybe an unexpected guest or if there's an office exchange/white elephant game, or something like that. 

julianna

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Re: What to do with an unwanted re-gift? Re-gift it?
« Reply #12 on: June 25, 2013, 10:45:27 AM »
I'm assuming you don't care for this wine, since you didn't mention drinking it yourself (although previous posters have made a good point that you can cook with it).  It's perfectly fine to regift it, but if you are giving it to someone who doesn't drink wine and/or to someone to whom you would not ordinarily give a hostess gift, I think you should explain the situation (Outdoor Girl's wording sounds good).  Without the explanation, it would be strange and awkward to give to someone that you know doesn't drink wine, and in a situation where you don't normally give hostess gifts, it could inadvertently change the dynamic (the next time that person came over, they might wonder if they should bring a hostess gift, and before you know it, you've started a whole thing).


Hmmmmm

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Re: What to do with an unwanted re-gift? Re-gift it?
« Reply #13 on: June 25, 2013, 11:39:55 AM »
I wouldn't take it as a hostess gift to the upcoming dinner party. Since you know they don't drink it, it would appear as if you expected them to open it to serve that night.

Is there a reason you can't just hold on to it until you need a bottle of red to serve to guests or to give to someone you believe would enjoy it?

Winterlight

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Re: What to do with an unwanted re-gift? Re-gift it?
« Reply #14 on: June 25, 2013, 11:45:08 AM »
You can do whatever you want with it- drink it, bathe in it or give it to someone else.

I wouldn't take it to a party where I know the hosts don't drink as a hostess gift, though.
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