Author Topic: How to say I hate your driving?  (Read 4629 times)

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JoyinVirginia

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Re: How to say I hate your driving?
« Reply #15 on: June 26, 2013, 01:16:05 AM »
Tell them in plain language. Let's exchange cell numbers. If we get separated then call. Do not drive dangerously or I will call the police and report you. The state police number is usually # number number. In my state Virginia it is #77 and I do lots of interstate driving so I have them on speed dial.
Seriously. Tell them if you drive famously, whipping in and out of traffic, I will just stop to get away from you, or call police, our both.

JoyinVirginia

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Re: How to say I hate your driving?
« Reply #16 on: June 26, 2013, 01:17:23 AM »
Another alternative, get some washable paint and let kids you are driving decorate windows of the cars, so they are easily identifiable.

kherbert05

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Re: How to say I hate your driving?
« Reply #17 on: June 26, 2013, 01:51:27 AM »
Another alternative, get some washable paint and let kids you are driving decorate windows of the cars, so they are easily identifiable.

CHeck your local laws before doing this or the tape thing. My sister got a big fine in HS for driving a shoe polished car because it obstructed the view - and the cop followed them to the next exit with a gas station and made sure they washed all of it off. (Have to give her friends points - they split the fine since they had all shoe polished the car. )
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m2kbug

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Re: How to say I hate your driving?
« Reply #18 on: June 26, 2013, 07:42:17 AM »
You don't have to tell anyone their driving stinks, just say you know where you're going, you have directions, so if you lose each other along the way, don't worry.

I really don't like convoys because you can so easily lose people along the way or get lost.  I would rather have an address and phone number and some directions, and provide these things to to other people.  This way, if you lose each other, everyone still knows where to go and you don't have to hang back for the turtles or try to keep up with the crazy people that are weaving in and out of traffic and blowing through yellows.  If you find yourself hopelessly lost, you have a phone number or two or three to work with. 

"Don't worry about watching for me, I have the directions, I know where we're going.  If we lose each other, I'm on my way.  If there's a problem I'll call you, and you have my number if you need to call me, right?  Let my write it down just in case." 

Maybe you can agree to meet at someplace in the middle.  Depending on the length of travel, people might like to use the restroom, stretch their legs, get something to eat, so you can try to connect in that place, count heads, and then head back out on your journey.

I always, always go after directions because I can be quiet the white knuckle driver on unfamiliar roads and freeways, especially mountainy and curvy roads.  I'm usually the turtle.  It is unsafe to try to keep track, and I have found myself with absolutely no idea where I'm supposed to go because I lost my leader somewhere because he's driving like a maniac.  It's just easier to to have an address.  You can try to convoy, but understand you might lose each other.  With cell phones, communication shouldn't be a huge issue.

guihong

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Re: How to say I hate your driving?
« Reply #19 on: June 26, 2013, 08:05:42 AM »
Back before cell phones, I was part of a group of cars driving from NE Ohio to the Black Hills.  Before we set out, the instructor set up rendezvous/gas up spots every hour and a half or so; each car waited for all the others to show up.  Everyone knew the stopping point for the night (this took three days because of pulling off to look at geology along the way).  The instructor, in Alpha car, was not about to convoy through Chicago or Milwaukee. 

Today it's even simpler-each car has a communications person (not the driver!), who has cell phone #'s from all the other cars.  But don't even ask for "permission", just tell them how it is or you don't go.



siamesecat2965

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Re: How to say I hate your driving?
« Reply #20 on: June 26, 2013, 09:20:32 AM »
I would simply tell them that you’ll meet them wherever, at the designated time, and leave it at that. I just don’t understand why they feel the need to travel in a convoy, as long as you arrive at the designated place, at the designated time. I would be a nervous wreck trying to follow someone. One time I had my mom following me from MD to NJ, as I wasn’t comfortable with her making the trip alone. It was very stressful for me, and tiring as I kept looking back for her, etc.  Doing it on your own allows for any stops you might need or want to make, without having to worry about whether or not the others know you’re stopping, etc.

TootsNYC

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Re: How to say I hate your driving?
« Reply #21 on: June 26, 2013, 09:43:17 AM »
Well, if they're a generation older, they may have started doing this sort of thing in the days before cell phones and MapQuest/GPS.


cwm

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Re: How to say I hate your driving?
« Reply #22 on: June 26, 2013, 10:02:47 AM »
I do travel in convoys, but it's completely different. We'll only have about three or four cars at most, and we all know what the other cars look like. We all have a good IDEA of where we're going, but not the specifics in how to get there from the roads, and where we like to go, maps won't help too much.

But as I said, we all know what the other cars in our group look like. We don't have to stay immediately in a row. Lead car is responsible for the car behind them. Second car is responsible for lead car and the car behind him, and so on and so forth. If you can keep track of YOUR two cars (immediately in front of and behind you in the convoy) then we won't get separated. If one car falls off, the others tend to fall off pretty quickly too, and that's where the cell phones come out. We had the tail car get blown off the road one time, and it took less than two minutes for the lead car to pull off the road and call back along the line to see what was going on.

I would tell these drivers that with new technology they don't need to stay so close. Have them designate someone in their car (possibly someone younger) as a "technology officer" to manage the GPS/map and phones. Or get a set of walkie-talkies to share between the cars so you can keep in touch without driving so dangerously.

If they refuse to change, then give them your cell phone number and say you'll be meeting them there, but you will NOT be a part of this caravan due to your own views on driving and road safety. Don't make it accusatory, just state simply that you can't be involved in such a thing, but aren't they so glad that you already know how to get there and they'll have one less car to have to worry about in the caravan?

bopper

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Re: How to say I hate your driving?
« Reply #23 on: June 26, 2013, 10:12:14 AM »
"Bring up the rear".  Say I will bring up the rear, and i know the route and have a GPS so if anyone gets behind I will ride with them.

camlan

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Re: How to say I hate your driving?
« Reply #24 on: June 26, 2013, 10:16:22 AM »
Well, if they're a generation older, they may have started doing this sort of thing in the days before cell phones and MapQuest/GPS.

That's what I was thinking. At some point in the past, this convey made a bit more sense (although they way they drive, it still wasn't safe.) When we went on trips for the various organizations I was in when I was younger, every car had a typed set of directions, and various phone numbers they could call for help when they found a pay phone. We never convoyed and no one ever got lost for more than half an hour or so.

For this current trip, I'd follow cwm's advice--just tell them that you won't be in the convoy and give them your cell phone number.

For the future, because I think it will take some time for them to change, start working on the leaders of the group. Point out the changes in technology that make the convey unnecessary. Bring up the idea of traveling separately, but meeting up at various checkpoints. And cell phones? As long as there are two cell phones (one for backup if a battery dies) in every car, the group can know instantly if there's trouble.

It might have to get down to pointing out specific dangerous driving that has been done. Try not to use names, but do say that you won't let your daughter be a passenger in the convoys any longer, as you fear for her safety. And that you will be bringing up the safety issue with other parents.

The convoy might have made sense in the past. It does not now. And it is a safety risk.
Nothing is impossible, the word itself says, “I’m possible!” –Audrey Hepburn


julianna

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Re: How to say I hate your driving?
« Reply #25 on: June 26, 2013, 11:05:39 AM »
I know it will be a difficult conversation, but I think you should talk to the leaders about how the current method is dangerous.  If they refuse to change, then you should use some of the other great suggestions given here.  But I am willing to bet that there are parents who haven't driven in these convoys, who have no idea that their children are being put in dangerous situations when they go on these trips.  If I were one of those parents, I would be eternally grateful that you spoke up to protect all the passengers, not just those riding in your car.


Judah

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Re: How to say I hate your driving?
« Reply #26 on: June 26, 2013, 11:18:59 AM »
Just refuse to be a part of the convoy. They can't make you, right? If you have to tell them something, let it be "The convoy makes me nervous, so I won't be joining it. I know where we're going and I'll meet you there." If necessary, exchange cell phone numbers. Don't give room for argument, just make it plain that you're going to do it your way.
Ask for what you want. Let's be clear on this one:
Subtle hints don't work.
Strong hints don't work.
Really obvious hints don't work.
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Secret

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Re: How to say I hate your driving?
« Reply #27 on: June 26, 2013, 11:45:01 AM »
I can't figure out the reason for getting there at the exact same time.  If it is a group check in, well, you just wait around for 20 min if you are early.  In this day and age, with the advanced planning of these trips and GPS technology, there is no need for a convoy.  If someone gets lost, one of the teens in the car surely has a cell phone and someone can text another car to say,  "Missed exit 123, took 10 min to get back on freeway, will be 10 min behind you now."

The Wild One, Forever

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Re: How to say I hate your driving?
« Reply #28 on: June 26, 2013, 11:47:56 AM »
Just refuse to be a part of the convoy. They can't make you, right? If you have to tell them something, let it be "The convoy makes me nervous, so I won't be joining it. I know where we're going and I'll meet you there." If necessary, exchange cell phone numbers. Don't give room for argument, just make it plain that you're going to do it your way.

I completely agree with this, and I would also refuse to participate.

Last summer, my good friend followed me up north for my big move.  She insisted we stay together on the highway, even though she has a fully functioning GPS, I could make the drive blindfolded, and we both have cell phones.  It wasn't too bad with only two cars, but I still would have preferred we just keep in touch via cell and rendezvous when necessary.  She drives way too fast for my comfort level, and when she was in the lead, keeping up was stressful.  Then she became angry when I took the lead and did not keep in her in my sights, even though we were going through a major city at rush hour.    ::)  Never again!
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GoTwins

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Re: How to say I hate your driving?
« Reply #29 on: June 26, 2013, 12:30:03 PM »
I wouldn't paint or tape anything to the windows. You could all get matching flags that clip to your windows similar to this one: http://www.amazon.com/MLB-Minnesota-Twins-Car-Flag/dp/B001PR0G24
Sports team of your choice, of course.  ;D