Thank you, TootsNYC. That's what I am trying to say. I'm not offended she is getting rid of all the stuff that was wedding gifts. It's her stuff and she can do whatever she wants with it. What I am a little stung by is that she's advertising that she is getting rid of the gifts TO the people who gave her the gifts. That's the part that's bothering me.
I can totally understand her wanting rid of the stuff that reminds her of her failed marriage. I can understand wanting to divest herself of that stuff and close the book on that chapter of her life.
I agree with the bolded. When I give someone a gift, if they want to get rid of it 5 minutes later, well, fine. But just don't rub it in my face. I've been decluttering slowly for the past ~year and a half, going through closets & drawers and getting rid of all kinds of stuff, including plenty of things that were gifts. It's taking me a long time because I'm selling whatever I can on ebay.
And yeah, some of the gifts, I do specifically remember who it was from. And I do think fondly of the person who gave it to me. But that doesn't change the fact that I simply don't want it in my home anymore. However, I would not purposely advertise the fact that I'm getting rid of it by flaunting the sale to them. I think that is hurtful.
You know, if it's a blender or a toaster, then yeah, who can remember who gave you that. If it's a special crystal bowl or a unique picture frame, for example, you're more likely to remember the giver. And the giver is also more likely to remember giving it.
I'm guessing that it's those unique items she's selling, not the more mundane ones, and thus the hurt. I don't think having a particular feeling, being hurt in this case, is an over reaction. You can't help how you feel. If you said anything to her, that might be so nice, but you are just telling us instead. You have a right to be hurt. Now you just put it behind you and move on.