Sorry the kid is 2 years and 3 months old, mine just turned 3.
The playgrounds are pretty quiet, not many kids. But at this age they either play together for a few minutes and separeate and then come back to the same equipment. If my kid gets near hers, her kid just pushes as mine goes by.
As a mom of a pushy kid, I am sorry that the other mother isn't doing enough. I had a thread on this subject a while ago where my child was the aggressor.
This is what I feel would be appropriate. Let's pretend the pusher is named Johnny and your child is Sally. Johnny pushes Sally as he walks by her. You are interacting with the other mother when this happens.
You stop your conversation immediately and say
"Oh, Johnny just pushed Sally. Johnny, that wasn't nice. Sally, are you okay?" Then you go to your child and redirect them to another area to play.
Repeat as necessary.
Don't shun the other woman, but by reinforcing to your own child that the other child did, in fact, do something wrong, you will end up communicating to both the other child and mother that you don't tolerate shoving.
This is also a gentle enough tactic that it won't overtly embarrass the mother if she just missed what her kid did. As the mother of a rather aggressive toddler, I appreciate when other parents gently alert me to the fact that Little Knit did something naughty and I missed it. It gives me the chance to immediately address her behaviour and reinforce better ways to play.
I can almost guarantee you that after the first or second time you do this, the other mother will take a more active and immediate role in redirecting her child's play.
I also want to say - it's not necessarily a parenting failure on the other mother's part. If she is addressing it consistently, every single time it happens, she's probably doing the very best she can. Pushing/shoving/hitting/etc is a pretty common stage around the 2 year mark for many children. It happens moreso when the child has difficulty communicating in other ways.
With Little Knit, she gets two chances when we go to the park. If she pushes or hits more than twice, we leave immediately. It's all I can do. Not every parent does that, though. Some have a higher threshold, some just don't know what to do.
All you can reasonably do is reinforce to your child that pushing/hitting/etc is not acceptable behaviour and hope the other child catches on soon.
I disagree. IMO pushing/hitting is completely unacceptable. If done once, Kid does not get a second chance.
No, my kids were not saints, and we had to leave the local park more than a few times.
Kareng... my initial reaction to your words was to be pretty insulted, as I felt that you were implying that I don't do enough when I give my child a chance to change her behaviour before going to the next stage of disciplinary action. And yet, after having taken a second to walk away and reflect on my reaction, I know that you did not mean anything by it. But I came back to respond because I think my reaction underscore precisely why the OP needs to be careful here.
Every parent/child combo is different and when one parent steps in to correct the child of another parent when the other parent is standing right there
the chances that the other parent will be insulted that someone else is parenting their child for them and take it as an implication that they aren't doing enough.
Maybe the other parent really isn't
doing enough, but if they are at least doing something
(which, by the OP's own admission, the other mother is doing), it would be pretty rude and wrong to step in and correct the other child more harshly.
You can't make another parent/child leave the park. You can discourage your child from playing with the other child. You can make a loud neutral statement or a statement to your own child. But it seems to me to be pretty much overstepping to re-correct the child or step in when the mother has already said something.
So, like so many others have said, you can teach your child to speak up and say "don't push". You can call the other mother's attention to it. But it really does behoove us all to think twice about actually *correcting* someone else's child when the parent is standing right there
- unless you are very close indeed.