Etiquette School is in session! > "What an interesting assumption."

I forgot this phrase today. Argh!

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lorelai:
At my friend's bridal shower today a woman I have never spoken to asked me when we are planning on having children and just basically bombarded me with question after statement after question after statement.

Her: I saw you a year ago (at engagement party) and you weren't pregnant then. When are you planning? You aren't getting any younger you know. My daughter has kids and they're the biggest blessing.
Me: That's so true!
Her: You really shouldn't wait until you're in your 30s - you're going to have problems and it's going to be a lot harder to have them.
Me: Since I'm over 30 I guess I failed that one!
Her: All I do every day is take care of my grandkids and it's so wonderful. You shouldn't keep your mother waiting.
Me: (Deflecting) Oh it would be really nice to have one at the same time as the bride!

Meanwhile evil me wanted to say: Actually we might not be able to have children and it's heartbreaking to think about, but thanks for reminding me! Maybe you should keep your fat mouth shut.

And then too late, I remembered "what an interesting assumption!" Too late. It would have been perfect.

Angel B.:
What an incredibly rude woman. I'm sorry you had to deal with that lorelai!

Luci:

--- Quote from: lorelai on July 14, 2013, 04:09:06 AM ---Her: All I do every day is take care of my grandkids and it's so wonderful. You shouldn't keep your mother waiting.
.....
Meanwhile evil me wanted to say: Actually we might not be able to have children and it's heartbreaking to think about, but thanks for reminding me! Maybe you should keep your fat mouth shut.

--- End quote ---
I did once remind someone that not everyone can have children, but not the idea that it was hurtful to mention it. Also, the idea that some people really don't want children would not come up, in case you are wondering.

I also think I would feel sorry for both the grandmother and the grandchildren. Her inplying that her life revolves around theirs is hard on grandparent and grandchildren. This is true even if she does take care of them all day because she won't when they go to school and gain independence otherwise. Maybe that's what the awful phrase "get a life" means!

faithlessone:

--- Quote from: lorelai on July 14, 2013, 04:09:06 AM ---Meanwhile evil me wanted to say: Actually we might not be able to have children and it's heartbreaking to think about, but thanks for reminding me! Maybe you should keep your fat mouth shut.

--- End quote ---

Sadly, with some people, even this doesn't work.

My best friend had a lot of medical problems when she was younger, and despite the fact that she now looks and feels healthy, she's been told that she can never have children. It would be highly unlikely that she could conceive, and even if, by some miracle, she could, her body isn't capable of carrying to term. However, she and her fiancÚ are pretty clear that they don't want children yet. (They're only 23).

This doesn't stop various people, from women at her church to her own aunt, telling her that "God will grant her a baby" or cooing about the blessings of surrogacy and adoption.

So yeah, some people just have to be bean dipped forever.

NyaChan:

--- Quote from: faithlessone on July 14, 2013, 09:50:10 AM ---
--- Quote from: lorelai on July 14, 2013, 04:09:06 AM ---Meanwhile evil me wanted to say: Actually we might not be able to have children and it's heartbreaking to think about, but thanks for reminding me! Maybe you should keep your fat mouth shut.

--- End quote ---

Sadly, with some people, even this doesn't work.

My best friend had a lot of medical problems when she was younger, and despite the fact that she now looks and feels healthy, she's been told that she can never have children. It would be highly unlikely that she could conceive, and even if, by some miracle, she could, her body isn't capable of carrying to term. However, she and her fiancÚ are pretty clear that they don't want children yet. (They're only 23).

This doesn't stop various people, from women at her church to her own aunt, telling her that "God will grant her a baby" or cooing about the blessings of surrogacy and adoption.

So yeah, some people just have to be bean dipped forever.

--- End quote ---

Oh yes, I once pointed this out to someone who I witnessed questioning another person.  Their response?  "Oh I would have heard if it were something like THAT."  There's no winning with these people.  >:(

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