Author Topic: How much does a funeral typically cost?  (Read 2910 times)

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Jocelyn

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Re: How much does a funeral typically cost?
« Reply #45 on: August 31, 2013, 05:30:50 PM »


If one chooses not to be embalmed or cremated there are very few options for burial. Most cemeteries will not accept someone who has not been embalmed. There are no "green" cemeteries in my state, 
Muslims are buried without embalming, and I believe some Jewish congregations also bury right away. Perhaps you could make arrangements with with their cemeteries?

Jocelyn

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Re: How much does a funeral typically cost?
« Reply #46 on: August 31, 2013, 05:37:50 PM »


I'd find that rather amusing myself.  Perhaps I could haunt the museum.   
That's precisely what terrifies me. I came to this realization while in the Smithsonian Natural History museum as a child. As an adult, I've met Native Americans who told me that those who are sensitive to spirits can indeed see and hear the spirits of their ancestors in natural history museums, begging to be taken back home where they can be at peace. Pemina Yellow Bird, who was then a spokeswoman for several tribes about the repatriation of native remains, told me that she can't go into buildings where there are native remains without having the spirits come to talk to her. I'm not usually aware of spirits (not since the Smithsonian incident), and I don't want to be, and I wouldn't want to accompany Pem into a museum.

Jocelyn

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Re: How much does a funeral typically cost?
« Reply #47 on: August 31, 2013, 05:54:20 PM »
Several of you mentioned no visitation.
A month ago, I would have said that the visitation would be unimportant to me. My mother died 3 weeks ago.
The visitation was, far more than the funeral, important in helping me come to a sense of closure. I was there with Mom on the morning of the day she died, but had returned home when I got the call from my family. I didn't realize how very important it was for me to have 2 hours to walk around in the room, to receive condolences, to stand at the photo display and tell people about the photos...occasionally walking by the coffin. Mom looked fantastic; I think the reason was that she was dressed and arranged by people who'd known her in life. She'd always said she would come back to haunt us if we let someone paint up her face like so many elderly women are rouged up. If anything, she needed more lipstick- Mom never went anywhere without putting on fresh lipstick. Her hair was styled by her former stylist, exactly as she'd always worn it. I kept working myself up to it...I KNEW that I had to touch her to say goodbye. Somehow, I knew that I had to do that, or I'd always regret it. So as we were leaving, I went back and did what I'd done every night as she was dying all summer- I held her hand, and kissed her forehead, and told her good night.
The next day at the funeral, the casket was closed when they brought us into the church. First time I've been to a funeral where the family didn't go up to the casket before it was closed. If we hadn't had the visitation, I would not have had that opportunity to say goodbye in a way that I feel was absolutely essential for me- but in a way that even a month ago I would have said would have been unimportant.
So, I guess what I'm saying is keep in mind, while pre-planning funerals, that things that seem unimportant in advance may turn out to be crucial at the time, and allow yourselves the option of making those last-minute changes.

Belle

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Re: How much does a funeral typically cost?
« Reply #48 on: August 31, 2013, 06:19:37 PM »
$10,000 sounds like the right ballpark. It's crazy how much funerals cost. When my dad died five years ago, we paid right around $10,000 for the funeral. He was cremated, so no burial plot or tombstone, and we rented the casket for the viewing (vs. purchasing). Musicians were friends (i.e., unpaid), and I don't think we paid more than a minimal honorarium for the minister. We almost needed to schedule extra funerals for me and my mom when we found out the price.

On top of that, we paid around $1300 for a casual lunch afterwards (standard in our area to feed people afterwards), plus $300 or so for the obituary. We skipped putting an obituary in the major newspaper because it was over $500.

Shockingly, there were no payment plans available. Pay now, or no funeral. Suffice it to say it all went on a credit card until we figured out the finances (which my dad had always taken care of).

wolfie

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Re: How much does a funeral typically cost?
« Reply #49 on: September 03, 2013, 02:50:45 PM »
Depends on what you buy/plan for.  I want a home cremation (which no one allows except in time of Zombie Apocalypse  ;) ).  So a crematorium costs about $1000-2000. DH wants to bury me in the yard of our other house.  >:D Which is legal.. but I have a huge zombie phobia (yes, I do) and want to be cremated. I'll haunt him if he is around to not follow my wishes.
I have a phobia of anthropologists and natural history museums. I do not want to be dug up for the 4th graders to come gawk at every year.
Hmm.. if there at least two of us with this idea maybe there is an actual phobia about it?

Twik

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Re: How much does a funeral typically cost?
« Reply #50 on: September 03, 2013, 03:17:12 PM »
I'd LOVE to be dug up and spend eternity in a museum!
My cousin's memoir of love and loneliness while raising a child with multiple disabilities will be out on Amazon soon! Know the Night, by Maria Mutch, has been called "full of hope, light, and companionship for surviving the small hours of the night."

ladyknight1

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Re: How much does a funeral typically cost?
« Reply #51 on: September 03, 2013, 04:10:57 PM »
I do not want a visitation or a funeral with my body present, since that won't be me any more in my beliefs.

We recently had a long time volunteer and staffer at the camp where I volunteer pass away after an illness. His memorial service was moving and memorable, with all of his pictures and memorabilia around the room. The camp chaplain delivered the eulogy, his children spoke, and people who had a few special words spoke. The camp ranger built a memorial for him that would be placed at the lake. That is how I want my memorial to be. The family did not pay for anything but the cremation.

CreteGirl

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Re: How much does a funeral typically cost?
« Reply #52 on: September 03, 2013, 04:24:05 PM »
When I was planning my MIL's funeral, the funeral director tried to upsell me on all kinds of things, including a $36,000 mausoleum.  He said that (for an additional fee), they would be able to dig up all my MIL's dead relatives that were buried in their cemetery, cremate them, and put them in the mausoleum.

I was appalled.

bopper

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Re: How much does a funeral typically cost?
« Reply #53 on: September 04, 2013, 11:38:45 AM »
There are also other costs like death certificates.and other things that aten't officially part of the funeral.

Some areas have laws so if you want to bury cremated remains you.still need a vault. The remains might be in a cardboard box but the burial still is a bit more expemsive than you'd think.

As far as caskets, Costco actually sells them!

I told my daughter that, and she said:  "What, do they come in packs of 10?"

 ;D

Outdoor Girl

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Re: How much does a funeral typically cost?
« Reply #54 on: September 04, 2013, 01:32:01 PM »
There are also other costs like death certificates.and other things that aten't officially part of the funeral.

Some areas have laws so if you want to bury cremated remains you.still need a vault. The remains might be in a cardboard box but the burial still is a bit more expemsive than you'd think.

As far as caskets, Costco actually sells them!

I told my daughter that, and she said:  "What, do they come in packs of 10?"

 ;D

LOL.
I have CDO.  It is like OCD but with the letters in alphabetical order, as they should be.
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