General Etiquette > general's yoga time

(1/3) > >>

One day a week, I go to a very early am yoga class.  I love it, and I love (most of) the people there.  There is one man who is...there's no nice way to say it....bothering me.  I get to class early so I can get centered and prepare my intentions for the day's practice.  He doesn't come every week, but when he does he's there early, too.  He wants to pass the time before class by talking.  If he's talking to someone else, I can tune him out.  Usually, he wants to talk to me.  He's loud.  He laughs at inappropriate times.  He yammers about subjects that only he understands.  The end of class is just as bad.  He's a hugger.  I am not a hugger.  I'm especially not a hugger when all parties involved are drenched in sweat.  I'm at the end of my rope.  I am no longer willing to accommodate the interruption of my me time. 
Since subtle clues don't seem to work at all, I have decided that I am going to say something to him next time.  I want to be polite but firm.  Something along the lines of: "Talkie, I need to be quiet for a few minutes before we start class."  I will say this in a gentle tone with a smile on my face.  For hugging issues, I will be putting my hand out to stop him with a firm "No." 
I am trying to convince myself that this is the proper and polite way of handling this situation.  I don't want to scold him, and I don't want to embarrass him.  I just want to enjoy my class. 

People use the ipod/headphone trick a lot for situations like this.  But I can see where that wouldn't work for yoga.

So how about putting some of those foam earplugs in?  Then when he starts yammering at you, point to your ears and say, "sorry, can't understand you.  Earplugs.  I like some quiet time before class."   (doesn't matter if you can't hear what he's saying.) Then smile, give a little wave, and go back to zoning out.

You can take them out before class, and then use the polite stiff arm to deflect the hug afterward.

Before class, just be frank. "Good morning, Sam. I can't talk now, I'm trying to get centered before class." If he continues to pester you, give him a long, hard look and repeat, "Sam, I'm trying to get centered before class. I can't talk to anyone right now."

If it continues, say for more than two classes, talk to the instructor. Once you've told him directly that you do not want to talk to him, he should back off. If he doesn't, the instructor should work with you to stop the problem.

At the end of class, I'd recommend putting out a stiff arm, with the elbow locked, and saying, "Sorry, I'm not a hugger. Have a nice day. " Then walk away. Don't stand there while he tries to have a conversation or argue about the benefits of hugging. Just move.

I like camlan's suggestion - it sounds as if you need to be blunt with him, yet kind/polite

The talking before/after class is annoying enough, but the hugging thing is really creeping me out.

I agree with the PP who suggested a stiff arm to keep him away.  If he tries to avoid the arm or comes up behind you to try to ambush you with a hug, I think you're in the clear to consider it an assault and act accordingly.


[0] Message Index

[#] Next page

Go to full version