Author Topic: Drinks before a school meeting?  (Read 10267 times)

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MyFamily

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Re: Drinks before a school meeting?
« Reply #60 on: August 09, 2013, 06:00:58 PM »
I'm not touching the question about drinking because I really have nothing to add that hasn't already been said, and I've never eaten at Applebee's so I can't comment on that part, but the thing that jumped out at me is why was this only the mothers????  This was a meeting at school concerning their kids - where were the fathers????  My DH is right there with me at all parent meetings at our kids' school and he is not the only father there by a long shot.  So forget the drinking, the real issue in my mind was that there were no fathers involved. (and I really don't think that in a group that large these mothers were all single mom's).


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Yvaine

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Re: Drinks before a school meeting?
« Reply #61 on: August 09, 2013, 06:09:46 PM »
I'm not touching the question about drinking because I really have nothing to add that hasn't already been said, and I've never eaten at Applebee's so I can't comment on that part, but the thing that jumped out at me is why was this only the mothers????  This was a meeting at school concerning their kids - where were the fathers????  My DH is right there with me at all parent meetings at our kids' school and he is not the only father there by a long shot.  So forget the drinking, the real issue in my mind was that there were no fathers involved. (and I really don't think that in a group that large these mothers were all single mom's).

Well, when I was in elementary school, for whatever reason the PTA really was predominantly female (if this is a PTA meeting), and in any case it was not odd at all for one parent (of either gender) to stay home with the kids while the other went to the meeting. And it doesn't sound like this was the whole population of parents anyway but a subgroup of moms who, for whatever reason, generally do attend the meetings solo.

Curious Cat

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Re: Drinks before a school meeting?
« Reply #62 on: August 09, 2013, 06:21:38 PM »
I'm not touching the question about drinking because I really have nothing to add that hasn't already been said, and I've never eaten at Applebee's so I can't comment on that part, but the thing that jumped out at me is why was this only the mothers????  This was a meeting at school concerning their kids - where were the fathers????  My DH is right there with me at all parent meetings at our kids' school and he is not the only father there by a long shot.  So forget the drinking, the real issue in my mind was that there were no fathers involved. (and I really don't think that in a group that large these mothers were all single mom's).

I assumed they were watching the kids.

Iris

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Re: Drinks before a school meeting?
« Reply #63 on: August 09, 2013, 06:53:58 PM »
A glass of wine before a school meeting sounds like taking appropriate measures.   ;)

You know, I would have no problem if my child's teacher had a beer with dinner prior to an evening meeting, but if I was the teacher I probably wouldn't do it.  Mainly because to me, that's a "hey it's time to relax" signal, and I would probably seriously hate going to work later.  And I'd certainly not be ok with a teacher being "altered" when meeting with me.  But to me a beer/glass of wine with dinner is normal. 

This. PT conferences are exhausting for teachers. Personally I wouldn't have even one drink beforehand becauseI like to have one drink at the END of a long day, not in the middle of it. However I don't think it's unprofessional in general, assuming it really is just one.
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Piratelvr1121

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Re: Drinks before a school meeting?
« Reply #64 on: August 09, 2013, 07:08:18 PM »
If I were a teacher I wouldn't drink before doing an evening meeting, only because I'm kind of a lightweight and it would make me sleepy by the end of the evening. That also depends on what I'm drinking.  A glass of wine often will get me nice and sleepy, but I can polish off a Guinness and still be pretty good.  The body's a funny, funny thing.
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Betelnut

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Re: Drinks before a school meeting?
« Reply #65 on: August 09, 2013, 07:16:18 PM »
I get pretty tipsy on just one drink (mixed drink) so I probably wouldn't drink before a meeting or on any occasion when I would need to drive.  But I wouldn't care too much if others are doing it.  It would still make me cringe to see someone climb into the driver's seat of a car after "1 or 2" drinks though.
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hyzenthlay

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Re: Drinks before a school meeting?
« Reply #66 on: August 09, 2013, 07:40:35 PM »
I can't comment on that part, but the thing that jumped out at me is why was this only the mothers????

Could simply be that this group uses these evening as a girls night out as well. The letter didn't say this was all the parents, just a particular group of Moms.

I sure there were father's at the actual meeting, and were it my family I could see going for a meal and meeting my then husband at the school after.

TootsNYC

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Re: Drinks before a school meeting?
« Reply #67 on: August 09, 2013, 10:31:04 PM »
I can't comment on that part, but the thing that jumped out at me is why was this only the mothers????

Could simply be that this group uses these evening as a girls night out as well. The letter didn't say this was all the parents, just a particular group of Moms.

I sure there were father's at the actual meeting, and were it my family I could see going for a meal and meeting my then husband at the school after.

Because this was a specific, self-selected group of people, and they all happened to be female, that's why. It's not like the school dictated who would be there.  One mom, who probably feels that she knows other moms but doesn't really know other dads, or doesn't personally care to socialize with them the way she'd enjoy socializing with other moms, organized the outing.

People are allowed to decide that they personally want (or don't want) to socialize with any other person using whatever reason they choose. Including the other person's sex.

katycoo

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Re: Drinks before a school meeting?
« Reply #68 on: August 10, 2013, 12:24:53 AM »
I'd have been in the group that was drinking.  As long as people were still capacble of being a productive part of the meeting, I wouldn't care.

And I was feel the same if it was the teachers out for dinner as well.  But I come from a professional industry where drinking is part of the culture.

Drinking DURING a parent teacher conference, I'd think odd, but if they shared I'd probably get over it quickly. ;)

Winterlight

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Re: Drinks before a school meeting?
« Reply #69 on: August 10, 2013, 08:37:54 AM »
Unless they get so plastered they can't drive, I wouldn't care.

I think the LW needs real problems if this is what they're getting in  a tizzy about.
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YummyMummy66

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Re: Drinks before a school meeting?
« Reply #70 on: August 10, 2013, 09:43:03 AM »
I don't see a problem with one or two drinks with dinner.

Drunk?  Yes, that I see a problem with no matter where you are going to after dinner.

bonyk

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Re: Drinks before a school meeting?
« Reply #71 on: August 10, 2013, 12:51:01 PM »
Since everybody's in agreement, I have another scenario:  Last day of school, at dismissal, (half day for students), a mother says to a teacher, "You put up with my kid all year, and you definitely deserve this," and hands her a one of those reusable plastic cups with a straw in it.  Teacher takes a sip, and it's vodka.


Okay to drink?  Students are gone, our rooms are packed, but we are not allowed to leave the building for another 2.5 hours.

miranova

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Re: Drinks before a school meeting?
« Reply #72 on: August 10, 2013, 12:54:52 PM »
Since everybody's in agreement, I have another scenario:  Last day of school, at dismissal, (half day for students), a mother says to a teacher, "You put up with my kid all year, and you definitely deserve this," and hands her a one of those reusable plastic cups with a straw in it.  Teacher takes a sip, and it's vodka.


Okay to drink?  Students are gone, our rooms are packed, but we are not allowed to leave the building for another 2.5 hours.

That's not really a moral issue, but an issue of what is and isn't appropriate in the workplace.  I don't think a classroom is the right time and place for drinking.  There are enough people that would have a problem with that, that I would not think it advisable professionally.  It only takes one parent or administrator to flip out for it to have extreme negative consequences for the teacher in question.  Just not wise.

Outdoor Girl

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Re: Drinks before a school meeting?
« Reply #73 on: August 10, 2013, 12:55:03 PM »
I would say not OK.  You would still be on school property.  A drink at dinner at a restaurant away from the school is a different animal.

Some offices, a drink at the office would be fine.  A school?  Not so much.  Or in my case, a government office.

Now, if the mother had given her a sealed bottle to take home and enjoy later?  Totally OK.
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MurPl1

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Re: Drinks before a school meeting?
« Reply #74 on: August 10, 2013, 12:59:58 PM »
Here that would be against school policy.  I'd hate to think that parent got a teacher in trouble if someone figured out what was in the cup and didn't know she was ambushed.

As far as drinking before a meeting, we always had far better attendance at our committee meetings when we had them off site where we could have a beer or a wine. 

I don't understand the concept that otherwise responsible, reasonable adults somehow become irresponsible morons because they had a glass of wine.  Or that somehow it makes you a bad parent.