Author Topic: The Letters  (Read 2912 times)

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LifeOnPluto

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Re: The Letters
« Reply #15 on: August 17, 2013, 02:20:34 AM »
1) The apology by itself would have been fine. Reiterating that he didn't want to be her friend was not.

2) I personally wouldn't bother replying.

sweetonsno

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Re: The Letters
« Reply #16 on: August 17, 2013, 02:45:57 AM »
Going to go slightly against the grain here and plop down in Camp LifeonPluto. I don't think that the apology for causing someone pain is necessarily a bad thing in and of itself. Apologizing for causing someone pain is usually okay in my book. That said, I agree with LoP that you cancel out any graciousness and lose the right to pretend you were doing the right thing if you add the "still don't like you/want anything to do with you" sentiment.

I also agree that there's no need for any response. Chances are that this guy just wanted to feel like less of a jerk (for himself) and doesn't actually care whether or not she forgives him.

secretrebel

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Re: The Letters
« Reply #17 on: August 17, 2013, 06:04:25 AM »
There could be all sorts of reasons for sending the second letter. While apologising can be as much or more for the benefit of  apologiser than the person who was hurt, it would be kinder to assume it was meant genuinely and Simon now regrets his actions.

If I were River I would think that Simon seems to have now realised what he did was wrong - and I wouldn't respond because I would also have no interest in contacting him. I would hope that was the end of it.

If he contacted me a third time that's when I would say "please lose my address".

*inviteseller

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Re: The Letters
« Reply #18 on: August 17, 2013, 07:21:35 AM »
Perhaps Simon is in a 12 step program and is on the make amends step?  He just managed to make it worse.  What a jerk.

pinkflamingo

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Re: The Letters
« Reply #19 on: August 19, 2013, 10:19:08 AM »
OP here.

I think Simon was genuinely sorry for his first letter, but the apology did come off as entirely self-serving. For all those excoriating him, he is generally a decent person but one of his less pleasant qualities is a tendency to be judgmental.

River responded very nicely that she forgave him long ago and wished him and his family well, but please do not contact her again. It was pretty much a textbook-perfect response. I'm not sure I would have bothered.


peaches

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Re: The Letters
« Reply #20 on: August 19, 2013, 10:23:09 AM »
1) The apology by itself would have been fine. Reiterating that he didn't want to be her friend was not.

2) I personally wouldn't bother replying.

+1

pierrotlunaire0

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Re: The Letters
« Reply #21 on: August 19, 2013, 10:44:53 AM »
In her response, I think River just proved herself a class act.  Simon?  Not so much.
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