Author Topic: Ridiculous things your parents criticize you about  (Read 89969 times)

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acicularis

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Re: Ridiculous things your parents criticize you about
« Reply #705 on: October 15, 2013, 10:15:23 AM »
I used to get criticized for how I ate my food. And I'm not talking about bad manners.  No, just a silly quirk of mine. At dinner, I would eat one thing on my plate, finish it, and then move onto a different food on the plate. This probably developed when I was a little kid, and my mother would fill my plate, and I was expected to eat everything on it. I would first eat what I liked best, then my next favorite, and finally what I liked least. My mother thought I should take a bite or two of one thing and then a bite or two of another, etc. Like she did, because of course that must be the only acceptable way to eat  ::)

I remember being badgered at a couple meals to try it her way. Instead of enjoying my food I'd be thinking "OK, I've eaten two bites of chicken, I guess I have to eat rice now. Oh no! I forgot, and half my rice is gone and I haven't touched my peas yet! Do I eat the same amount of peas to try to even it out? Should I skip the rice on the next go round?!" It was really stressful!

I finally burst out "This is driving me crazy! I can't do it!" My mother was quite miffed, but I was allowed to go back to my usual method. She never stopped criticizing it, though.

acicularis

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Re: Ridiculous things your parents criticize you about
« Reply #706 on: October 15, 2013, 10:25:40 AM »
My mother criticized me once for discussing our finances with my oldest child.  Mind you, it wasn't like I was showing him our budget, telling him how much his father and I make, or discussing any debt with him.  All I had said was something to the effect of "We're not wealthy enough to be buying you boys a brand new computer just for you to play on."

Your mother would have a real problem with me, then!  :)  I frequently tell my girls things like  "No, I'm not prepared to spend that much money today," or "If I buy you those more expensive sneakers (or skirt, or dress), then there will be less money for other school clothes." When they want to buy books at the school Book Fair, I tell them how much money I am willing to give them, and they have to decide what they can afford with that. Heck, sometimes I even intentionally "think out loud" about something I'm getting for myself or choosing not to get for myself because it's too expensive. I figure, how else are they to learn how to make good decisions about how to spend money?

GlitterIsMyDrug

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Re: Ridiculous things your parents criticize you about
« Reply #707 on: October 15, 2013, 11:21:55 AM »
I thought of something really weird an uncle said to me once. Things to know about this uncle, he's a bigot, through and through, and he's only related to me by marriage (ok not totally important to the story, but still...I need to distance myself from this man).

I was playing one of those clapping hand games with a friend of mine, ya know, you clap your hands together, there's some sort of rhyme. Anyways, my uncle sees us and tells us to knock it off. We were outside, so it wasn't like we were making noise in the house, so I just ignored him and kept clapping. He tells us to stop again, we keep going, then her mom calls her home (they lived next door) and uncle comes up to me and says "You can't play those games", I ask why I can't and he says "Those are colored girl games, you are white and if you keep playing those games people will think you aren't", well I am in fact not 100% white, which I point out to him and he says "Shut up. You want people knowing that about you? You want them thinking you're an N word (said the word), you pass as white, and that's the right thing to be". I told him he was a mean person and went inside to tell my mom what he'd said. He wasn't allowed to be around me after that.

ladyknight1

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Re: Ridiculous things your parents criticize you about
« Reply #708 on: October 15, 2013, 11:28:36 AM »
I used to get criticized for how I ate my food. And I'm not talking about bad manners.  No, just a silly quirk of mine. At dinner, I would eat one thing on my plate, finish it, and then move onto a different food on the plate. This probably developed when I was a little kid, and my mother would fill my plate, and I was expected to eat everything on it. I would first eat what I liked best, then my next favorite, and finally what I liked least. My mother thought I should take a bite or two of one thing and then a bite or two of another, etc. Like she did, because of course that must be the only acceptable way to eat  ::)

I remember being badgered at a couple meals to try it her way. Instead of enjoying my food I'd be thinking "OK, I've eaten two bites of chicken, I guess I have to eat rice now. Oh no! I forgot, and half my rice is gone and I haven't touched my peas yet! Do I eat the same amount of peas to try to even it out? Should I skip the rice on the next go round?!" It was really stressful!

I finally burst out "This is driving me crazy! I can't do it!" My mother was quite miffed, but I was allowed to go back to my usual method. She never stopped criticizing it, though.

My FIL eats one particular food item before moving on. I just think of it as a quirk. Nothing to criticize!

Venus193

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Re: Ridiculous things your parents criticize you about
« Reply #709 on: October 15, 2013, 11:47:14 AM »
Here's another one about hair: When I was a teenager, my mother had this thing about me washing my hair "too much." I washed it every other day, because if I didn't, it got very oily. My mother claimed that a friend of hers had read something about models who had gone bald from washing their hair too often. "They literally washed the hair off of their heads!" she warned me.

And don't get me started on the whole don't go to bed with a wet head, don't go out with a wet head, don't go out with a head that has recently been wet issue. That way lies madness.

How about this one:  My mother hated the fact that I had oily hair and skin while hers were both dry.  After a while she convinced herself that having oily hair and skin was lower class.  Guess who still doesn't have crows' feet?   :P

wolfie

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Re: Ridiculous things your parents criticize you about
« Reply #710 on: October 15, 2013, 11:58:08 AM »
I used to get criticized for how I ate my food. And I'm not talking about bad manners.  No, just a silly quirk of mine. At dinner, I would eat one thing on my plate, finish it, and then move onto a different food on the plate. This probably developed when I was a little kid, and my mother would fill my plate, and I was expected to eat everything on it. I would first eat what I liked best, then my next favorite, and finally what I liked least. My mother thought I should take a bite or two of one thing and then a bite or two of another, etc. Like she did, because of course that must be the only acceptable way to eat  ::)

I remember being badgered at a couple meals to try it her way. Instead of enjoying my food I'd be thinking "OK, I've eaten two bites of chicken, I guess I have to eat rice now. Oh no! I forgot, and half my rice is gone and I haven't touched my peas yet! Do I eat the same amount of peas to try to even it out? Should I skip the rice on the next go round?!" It was really stressful!

I finally burst out "This is driving me crazy! I can't do it!" My mother was quite miffed, but I was allowed to go back to my usual method. She never stopped criticizing it, though.

that's funny - I do it the opposite way! Eat the least favorite first so that my last bite will be my favorite. Funny how we all end up doing the same thing in different ways.

nuit93

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Re: Ridiculous things your parents criticize you about
« Reply #711 on: October 15, 2013, 12:03:08 PM »
Here's another one about hair: When I was a teenager, my mother had this thing about me washing my hair "too much." I washed it every other day, because if I didn't, it got very oily. My mother claimed that a friend of hers had read something about models who had gone bald from washing their hair too often. "They literally washed the hair off of their heads!" she warned me.

And don't get me started on the whole don't go to bed with a wet head, don't go out with a wet head, don't go out with a head that has recently been wet issue. That way lies madness.

How about this one:  My mother hated the fact that I had oily hair and skin while hers were both dry.  After a while she convinced herself that having oily hair and skin was lower class.  Guess who still doesn't have crows' feet?   :P

I never quite got that obsession with having perfectly dry skin and hair.  My stepdad used to get on my case because I didn't wash my hair twice a day with astringent shampoo and avoid conditioner.  Whenever one of us moisturized our face he'd ask accusingly "why is your face so oily?".


Piratelvr1121

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Re: Ridiculous things your parents criticize you about
« Reply #712 on: October 15, 2013, 12:18:58 PM »
My mother used to make me nuts wrt how my older two dressed (the cut direct happened before my youngest came along and neither she nor dad have met him and won't for a while).

Now, back before the cut, my parents used to have the boys over once a week.  My oldest is like a stringbean.  He will eat you out of house and home and still look like he ought to be in line asking Fagin if he can have some more.  As such, he has to wear a belt or those jeans that have the adjustable waistband but IME those only do so much good for so long.

Anyway, my mother would come to pick them up and demand to know where my son's belts were.   I knew where they were.  At her house.  Because she'd take them there, take the belts off the pants when they changed for bed and keep the belts at her house, sending him in the pants with the adjustable waistband. But when I'd say "Well I had a couple, but they never do come back from your house." she'd snort and deny it. 

But then the next week son would come home from school with a belt I'd bought for him.  ::)

She also hated when I'd put mismatched mittens or gloves on their hands in the winter. 

"But they don't match!"
"Mom, what is the purpose of mittens and gloves?"
"To keep the hands warm."
"And that only works if they match?"
"But it doesn't look right!"
"But are their hands warm?"
"That's not the point!"
"I think that's exactly the point of mittens and gloves. To keep hands warm."

Also made her nuts when I'd wear one Christmas sock and one Halloween sock. 

I swear sometimes I was switched at birth, I really can't figure out just how someone like me came from people like them.
Beyond a wholesome discipline, be gentle with yourself. You are a child of the universe, no less than the trees and the stars.  You have a right to be here. Be cheerful, strive to be happy. -Desiderata

GlitterIsMyDrug

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Re: Ridiculous things your parents criticize you about
« Reply #713 on: October 15, 2013, 12:23:53 PM »
Also made her nuts when I'd wear one Christmas sock and one Halloween sock. 

I swear sometimes I was switched at birth, I really can't figure out just how someone like me came from people like them.

Mis-matched socks are magic. Doesn't she know that? (I believe this also means mis-matched gloves are magic too)

Piratelvr1121

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Re: Ridiculous things your parents criticize you about
« Reply #714 on: October 15, 2013, 12:28:23 PM »
Also made her nuts when I'd wear one Christmas sock and one Halloween sock. 

I swear sometimes I was switched at birth, I really can't figure out just how someone like me came from people like them.

Mis-matched socks are magic. Doesn't she know that? (I believe this also means mis-matched gloves are magic too)

Nah, even if you told her that she wouldn't buy it.  It would be like trying to explain nargles to a muggle when even fellow wizards were skeptical as to their presence.

I was kind of the Luna Lovegood of the family.
Beyond a wholesome discipline, be gentle with yourself. You are a child of the universe, no less than the trees and the stars.  You have a right to be here. Be cheerful, strive to be happy. -Desiderata

zyrs

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Re: Ridiculous things your parents criticize you about
« Reply #715 on: October 15, 2013, 12:41:48 PM »
I used to get criticized for how I ate my food. And I'm not talking about bad manners.  No, just a silly quirk of mine. At dinner, I would eat one thing on my plate, finish it, and then move onto a different food on the plate. This probably developed when I was a little kid, and my mother would fill my plate, and I was expected to eat everything on it. I would first eat what I liked best, then my next favorite, and finally what I liked least. My mother thought I should take a bite or two of one thing and then a bite or two of another, etc. Like she did, because of course that must be the only acceptable way to eat  ::)

I remember being badgered at a couple meals to try it her way. Instead of enjoying my food I'd be thinking "OK, I've eaten two bites of chicken, I guess I have to eat rice now. Oh no! I forgot, and half my rice is gone and I haven't touched my peas yet! Do I eat the same amount of peas to try to even it out? Should I skip the rice on the next go round?!" It was really stressful!

I finally burst out "This is driving me crazy! I can't do it!" My mother was quite miffed, but I was allowed to go back to my usual method. She never stopped criticizing it, though.

that's funny - I do it the opposite way! Eat the least favorite first so that my last bite will be my favorite. Funny how we all end up doing the same thing in different ways.

I do it the same way Wulfie does.  It came from the same "Must finish everything on the plate." place (one of my grandmothers thought I was too skinny.

Chip2

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Re: Ridiculous things your parents criticize you about
« Reply #716 on: October 15, 2013, 01:08:39 PM »
I used to get criticized for how I ate my food. And I'm not talking about bad manners.  No, just a silly quirk of mine. At dinner, I would eat one thing on my plate, finish it, and then move onto a different food on the plate. This probably developed when I was a little kid, and my mother would fill my plate, and I was expected to eat everything on it. I would first eat what I liked best, then my next favorite, and finally what I liked least. My mother thought I should take a bite or two of one thing and then a bite or two of another, etc. Like she did, because of course that must be the only acceptable way to eat  ::)

I remember being badgered at a couple meals to try it her way. Instead of enjoying my food I'd be thinking "OK, I've eaten two bites of chicken, I guess I have to eat rice now. Oh no! I forgot, and half my rice is gone and I haven't touched my peas yet! Do I eat the same amount of peas to try to even it out? Should I skip the rice on the next go round?!" It was really stressful!

I finally burst out "This is driving me crazy! I can't do it!" My mother was quite miffed, but I was allowed to go back to my usual method. She never stopped criticizing it, though.

My FIL eats one particular food item before moving on. I just think of it as a quirk. Nothing to criticize!

MsChip eats one thing at a time also. And if I'd let her she'd use separate plates for each item. Thing2 does the same thing.

Thing1 and I just dump the food on our plates and mix everything together for a flavor explosion. :)

Amanita

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Re: Ridiculous things your parents criticize you about
« Reply #717 on: October 15, 2013, 02:09:06 PM »
About "We'll see"- I HATE this, because all too often, it's shorthand for NO. My Navy friend is like this- there's a restaurant I would love for us to go to (It's Chinese food, which he likes), but he seems very resistant to the idea of us going. He always says "We'll see", which pretty much means no. It drives me nuts, and it's one thing I intend to call him out for when he pulls it again.

And I got a lot of crap from my fellow junior high students for my own advanced vocabulary. They thought I was doing it to insult them or make them look stupid, I meant no such thing! It was simply the result of having a high reading comprehension level, and liking to read about whatever interested me, even if it was advanced or technical stuff.
Well, we were even on the language front- I was rather sheltered, and couldn't understand a lot of the slang that they used, so that made us even. Only difference was that when somebody asked me what a word meant, I would tell them. My classmates on the other hand, would go to ridiculous lengths to avoid telling me what things meant, and this was years before urbandictionary.com (or even internet in most people's houses) became a thing.

Venus193

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Re: Ridiculous things your parents criticize you about
« Reply #718 on: October 15, 2013, 03:35:05 PM »

And I got a lot of crap from my fellow junior high students for my own advanced vocabulary. They thought I was doing it to insult them or make them look stupid, I meant no such thing! It was simply the result of having a high reading comprehension level, and liking to read about whatever interested me, even if it was advanced or technical stuff.
Well, we were even on the language front- I was rather sheltered, and couldn't understand a lot of the slang that they used, so that made us even. Only difference was that when somebody asked me what a word meant, I would tell them. My classmates on the other hand, would go to ridiculous lengths to avoid telling me what things meant, and this was years before urbandictionary.com (or even internet in most people's houses) became a thing.

Been there, too, as far back as elementary school.  It's a good thing I didn't cave.

Shalamar

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Re: Ridiculous things your parents criticize you about
« Reply #719 on: October 15, 2013, 04:06:32 PM »
I just remembered that my dad used to criticize me for showering too often and washing my hair too often.  He swore that one should only have to do those things once a week, tops - possibly even once every two weeks.   My dad's hair (at that time, anyway) was VERY greasy, and he always tended to smell of B.O.   Not really something I wanted as a teenager (or now, for that matter).