As a child, I was told I "look like a fat little Indian girl" if I wore my hair in pigtails. (did not know how to braid till a babysitter taught me)
was told, in grade school, that I ruined so many outfits by tucking, or not tucking in, the shirt.
I could list SO many things, but this one seems to sum it up-
In college, I finally found I could do things ok, even pretty well, on my own, and I was learning to trust others and try new things. (I had been very sheltered, and accused of all sorts of terrible things, I even got banned from TV for watching an MTV video!!)
Anyway, I was a founding member of a special group in college, one I had engraved on my senior ring, and have friends to this day from. It was work getting a charter, being an officer, enforcing the rules, etc...but it was MINE, and I was proud of it!
Around junior year, I mentioned to mom via a rare phone call that I was having a minor frustration with something about the group.
She sighed dramatically and said, "Why don't you just quit that silly group. I have no idea why you are a part of it anyway, it doesn't, and won't mean anything. It is too much trouble, just quit!"
This is the same mom that would not let my jr high friends have a goodbye party for me when we moved far away, because, "you have no real friends, they will forget you when you are gone."
so, it has been really hard for me to call someone a friend. Thanks, mom!
Oh, the MOST ridiculous thing I was criticized for was (caution-death of a child)
not giving birth to my full term still born daughter on her schedule.
See, we called her Sat evening, to tell her DD#2 was dead in the womb but still needed to be delivered, and I was staying at the hospital.
she did hit the road to make her one and only ever trip out this way.
DD was not born until Monday. We had the funeral Thursday, for other friends and arrangements.
Mom and stepdad changed from dress clothes into their travel clothes IN THE FUNERAL HOME's RESTROOM, instead of coming back home to share in the platters of food delivered by the church, knowing that people were coming over.
her words to me after burying my child?
"I had no idea the funeral would take so long to be arranged. We have to get back home. I am sure you understand."