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Author Topic: Ridiculous things your parents criticize you about  (Read 264775 times)

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Elfmama

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Re: Ridiculous things your parents criticize you about
« Reply #375 on: September 22, 2013, 07:05:53 PM »
When I graduated from high school and wanted to study astronomy, I was told that "girls don't study science," and that I should be a teacher or a nurse.  While I admire both of those professions, I absolutely am not emotionally suited to either of them. 

My mother was always telling me, "Put that book down and go do something!"  She wasn't a reader, and apparently felt that reading wasn't doing anything.

But don't nurses have to study science?  :o Or are chemistry and biology on some sort of "acceptable sciences for girls" list.
Oh, no.  Nurses in parents' fantasy land only take temperatures and dispense pills and wrangle bedpans.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
Common sense is not a gift, but a curse.  Because then
you have to deal with all the people who don't have it.
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BB-VA

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Re: Ridiculous things your parents criticize you about
« Reply #376 on: September 22, 2013, 07:09:30 PM »
When I graduated from high school and wanted to study astronomy, I was told that "girls don't study science," and that I should be a teacher or a nurse.  While I admire both of those professions, I absolutely am not emotionally suited to either of them. 

My mother was always telling me, "Put that book down and go do something!"  She wasn't a reader, and apparently felt that reading wasn't doing anything.

But don't nurses have to study science?  :o Or are chemistry and biology on some sort of "acceptable sciences for girls" list.
Oh, no.  Nurses in parents' fantasy land only take temperatures and dispense pills and wrangle bedpans.

And marry rich doctors.
"The Universe puts us in places where we can learn. They are never easy places, but they are right. Wherever we are, it's the right place and the right time. Pain that sometimes comes is part of the process of constantly being born."
- Delenn to Sheridan: "Babylon 5 - Distant Star"

Elfmama

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Re: Ridiculous things your parents criticize you about
« Reply #377 on: September 22, 2013, 08:25:39 PM »
I've heard the same thing; I don't flirt either.  I refuse to put myself in any situation that could make a fool out of me.

As to comparing a temporary tattoo to offering drugs, that is completely over the top.
What, you never heard the one about how chewing gum leads to bearing illegitimate children?
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
Common sense is not a gift, but a curse.  Because then
you have to deal with all the people who don't have it.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Joeschmo

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Re: Ridiculous things your parents criticize you about
« Reply #378 on: September 22, 2013, 09:02:12 PM »
I've heard the same thing; I don't flirt either.  I refuse to put myself in any situation that could make a fool out of me.

As to comparing a temporary tattoo to offering drugs, that is completely over the top.

Off topic but this might be worth reconsidering.  Some of my best times have been had while making a fool of myself.

Venus193

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Re: Ridiculous things your parents criticize you about
« Reply #379 on: September 22, 2013, 09:36:00 PM »
My mother also criticized my generosity.  She always said that everyone will take advantage of me.  She was desperate to make me feel stupid.





baglady

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Re: Ridiculous things your parents criticize you about
« Reply #380 on: September 22, 2013, 09:52:50 PM »
A few years ago I had a temporary clerical gig at a college that had a lot of nursing majors -- the majority of the degrees they conferred were in nursing. I gained a huge respect for nurses just by skimming the transcripts and such that I was processing. A nursing degree requires a lot of knowledge of biology, anatomy and physiology -- more science than my liberal arts bachelor's/journalism master's self could ever dream of getting through.
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Kaymyth

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Re: Ridiculous things your parents criticize you about
« Reply #381 on: September 22, 2013, 11:25:40 PM »

This!  There are reasons why my first date with my husband involved me in a corseted fairy costume, katanas, and pumpkins flying through the air.  (It helped that it was the day after Halloween.)

Live action Fruit Ninja (vegetable edition)?

You did get this on video, right?

It's called Pumpkin Katana Baseball, and it happens every 3-4 years.  No video, but there are pictures of both times it's come around.  It's the most fun anyone has ever had chopping jack-o-lanterns into mulch.

shadowfox79

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Re: Ridiculous things your parents criticize you about
« Reply #382 on: September 23, 2013, 02:08:16 AM »
Not so much a criticism but my mum just cannot grasp that I do not have any friends.  I don't know if she didn't notice that during the 25 years I lived at home I didn't go out and has blocked out the hours and hours of hysterical crying over my inability to fit into a group of friends but she seems convinced that I'm little miss social when actually I spend most evenings at home watching tv, surfing the net and playing Animal Crossing.

Funnily enough, mine were the opposite. I was never Miss Popular in school, but I was always part of a group, yet my dad liked to have loud conversations with my mum about why I didn't have any friends (or "many friends", sometimes).

Kariachi

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Re: Ridiculous things your parents criticize you about
« Reply #383 on: September 23, 2013, 10:04:33 AM »
Three things my father has said that will never leave me:

1) "That's why no one likes you!" Yelled at me out of the blue while I was eating a Reese's (I freeze them, peel off and eat the chocolate, then eat the peanut butter)

2) I can't remember the exact words, but he once yelled at me about how horrible we kids were for not cooking dinner for our mother on their anniversary (he picked me up from college on his way home, we got there to find my mom finishing making dinner, I was physically incapable of making it for her)

3) "Stop acting like you're having a panic attack." Yes dad, because Lord knows I always break down into tears, shake, and storm away from people. I'm sorry, I'm not about to keep driving when you're telling me how I'm screwing up and a voice in my head is telling me that if I just drive into that building/tree then I'll probably die and not have to worry about being a failure anymore.


He did end up apologizing for 2, and we did discuss 3 (yes, I know you want me to improve, driving me into an emotional breakdown isn't how you do it).

Things my mom has said that will stick with me:

1) "Well, if you spent more time downstairs this wouldn't be a problem." After my sister cussed me out and locked me out of the house once she found out that, instead of being downstairs and ignoring her asking for help in the kitchen like she'd thought, I'd been upstairs watching tv and hadn't heard her. Somehow my mother just couldn't understand that I go upstairs for a reason, and that reason is mostly to avoid them. And especially to avoid my sister's temper tantrums. Because apparently if I just stick around so my sister can call me worthless and a [cuss] and talk about how horrible I am and always have been, then she'll stop doing it.


Thankfully she's calmed down a bit since she started working and moved out.

And yet my family wonders why I have an anxiety disorder that gets triggered by the possibility of screwing up or looking stupid.  :-\
"Heh. Forgive our manners, little creature that we may well kill and eat you is no excuse for rudeness."

TootsNYC

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Re: Ridiculous things your parents criticize you about
« Reply #384 on: September 23, 2013, 10:15:54 AM »
Quote
1) "That's why no one likes you!" Yelled at me out of the blue while I was eating a Reese's (I freeze them, peel off and eat the chocolate, then eat the peanut butter)


*I* will like you--that's how I eat them too!

Kariachi

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Re: Ridiculous things your parents criticize you about
« Reply #385 on: September 23, 2013, 12:27:18 PM »
Quote
1) "That's why no one likes you!" Yelled at me out of the blue while I was eating a Reese's (I freeze them, peel off and eat the chocolate, then eat the peanut butter)


*I* will like you--that's how I eat them too!

It was ridiculous! I'm sorry but I grew up with the "There's no wrong way to eat a Reese's" campaign. If the people that make and sell them say you can't eat them wrong, you can't eat them wrong.

What's even worse is he said this to me four months after we'd moved into the house we're in now. So he stopped to tell his teenage daughter, who had been in a position to talk to other people her age for only a month and had a history of being bullied by both other kids and adults, that no one liked her and it was because she didn't eat her chocolates right!
"Heh. Forgive our manners, little creature that we may well kill and eat you is no excuse for rudeness."

gramma dishes

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Re: Ridiculous things your parents criticize you about
« Reply #386 on: September 23, 2013, 12:27:47 PM »
Kariachi  ~~  It sounds like you're still living at home.  I'm glad your sister and "things" have calmed down since she moved out, but honestly it sounds like you would benefit from moving out too. 

Hillia

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Re: Ridiculous things your parents criticize you about
« Reply #387 on: September 23, 2013, 12:29:54 PM »
DH's dad was a difficult man to grow up with.  Lots of mean spirited 'teasing', heavy hand with the belt, 'playful' wrestling matches that turned painful in the blink of an eye.  As adults, his sons tried to talk to him about some of the things from their childhood.  His response?  'Well, you boys didn't make it easier on me'.  Yeah, because children have a responsibility to be easy to raise!  (And for the record, neither of them were rebellious or otherwise hard to handle; just normal kids trying to do what their parents wanted).

gramma dishes

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Re: Ridiculous things your parents criticize you about
« Reply #388 on: September 23, 2013, 12:31:37 PM »
Ah ... I see by your most recent post that you are a teenager, so my suggestion that maybe you should move out isn't practical or realistic for you right now. 

Just remember that other people DO like you, regardless of how you eat your Reese's peanut butter cup!  That was, frankly, an odd (to the point of being bizarre) thing to say in response to a method of eating candy.  Now perhaps he meant that he didn't like you at that moment  -- because you didn't share with him!   ;D

Library Dragon

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Re: Ridiculous things your parents criticize you about
« Reply #389 on: September 23, 2013, 01:16:31 PM »
The reading too much issue was also an issue for me.  As many teens do I preferred to be in my bedroom.  My mother would yell at me for reading too much and not being in the living room watching TV with the family.  Watching TV was always a yelling fight, my step-father pontificating that what ever show we were watching was wrong and he knew better, and criticizing us for believing the Wild Kingdom narrator or what ever other show was on.  I was much happier reading in my room. 

Ironically, I was painfully shy in my dealings with people, but I was in drama at high school (improv bad--memorized lines good).  So, I was often learning lines.  It doesn't work well in a room of screaming, crying people. 

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