Author Topic: Ridiculous things your parents criticize you about  (Read 95263 times)

0 Members and 1 Guest are viewing this topic.

magicdomino

  • Hero Member
  • ***
  • Posts: 4799
Re: Ridiculous things your parents criticize you about
« Reply #465 on: September 26, 2013, 08:50:23 PM »
My mother would scoff at volunteer work because one doesn't get paid.

She would also criticize me for going to the Met Gift Shop today to meet Placido Domingo.

My mother was the same way.  In fact, as a teenager, I was pretty much forbidden to do volunteer work.  If I wanted to work, then spend the time and effort on a "real" job.  I can imagine what she would have thought of the community service that many high school students must perform in order to graduate.

mumma to KMC

  • Member
  • **
  • Posts: 640
Re: Ridiculous things your parents criticize you about
« Reply #466 on: September 27, 2013, 11:05:55 AM »
How I dress was always problematic.  Once I wore a red sweater with a khaki skirt.  I was just out of college and had bought myself these clothes with my meager earnings, and I was pretty proud of the outfit.  My father was so appalled that I wore red with khaki (???) that he had to tell me off about it at length twice.  Twice. 

I had no idea red and khaki was so offensive. I love this combination, but khaki is really not my colour.

Does this mean I need to be upset with my son who just came downstairs in khaki pants and a red shirt? I think he looks rather nice. ;)

Thipu1

  • Super Hero!
  • ****
  • Posts: 6887
Re: Ridiculous things your parents criticize you about
« Reply #467 on: September 27, 2013, 11:13:53 AM »
Like black, khaki goes with everything. 

Where did he get this ridiculous idea? 

magicdomino

  • Hero Member
  • ***
  • Posts: 4799
Re: Ridiculous things your parents criticize you about
« Reply #468 on: September 27, 2013, 12:58:44 PM »
I wore a royal purple shirt with khaki pants yesterday.  That would have really given him a heart attack.   ::)

GlitterIsMyDrug

  • Hero Member
  • ***
  • Posts: 1120
Re: Ridiculous things your parents criticize you about
« Reply #469 on: September 27, 2013, 03:09:11 PM »
I remembered an ongoing critisim from mom that annoys me to no end.

So when I was little (and even now) I like to be at home. I like to go out and do stuff too, but I enjoy spending time at home. Always have. My mother likes to be out. She basically goes home to eat, shower, and sleep. In a blue moon she'll want to be at home but usually she's all about out and about.

When I was little (around 2 or maybe 3) we lived with my grandparents, there was 1 car for the whole family and mom didn't have her license at the time anyways. So one day grandma and grandpa are headed to the grocery store and mom asks if we can go with cause she's climbing the wall, my grandma asks me if I want to go grocery shopping and I say no (cause I'm like 2 and wanna stay with my toys and my big bird movie and I'm 2), grandma says "Well Glitter doesn't want to go, so you have to stay home with her" and off grandparents go with me and mom at home.

I have heard this story about a million times at this point. Usually after being called a "home body" in tone that does not indicate that's a positve personality trait. Basically rather then being mad with her mother who took the wants of the 2 year old over the wants of the other adult, she still mad at the one who was 2. And BTW it's not like when the got me out of the house I was a fit throwing kid. According to my mom, I had all of 2 meltdowns before the age of 5 out in public. I was usually pretty content, and easy to entertain with a picture book or just people watching (same way still, just most of my books have words now).

I tend to be introverted, I can be very social, outgoing and no one describes me as shy (quiet yes, shy no), but I need time alone, I'm an observer, I loath small talk (I do it, but I hate it), and having to socialize for too long with too many people stresses me out to no end and makes me really long from my PJs and my home. My mother is very extroverted. Loves big groups and gatherings, likes to be the life of the party, is always talking, so on and so forth. She still sees my introverted ways as something to fix. I need to be more social, out of the house more, more like her! She's been convinced several times that I'm depressed. I'm not. At all. I'm a generally happy person.

PastryGoddess

  • Super Hero!
  • ****
  • Posts: 5045
    • My Image Portfolio and Store
Re: Ridiculous things your parents criticize you about
« Reply #470 on: September 27, 2013, 03:24:36 PM »
I remembered an ongoing critisim from mom that annoys me to no end.

So when I was little (and even now) I like to be at home. I like to go out and do stuff too, but I enjoy spending time at home. Always have. My mother likes to be out. She basically goes home to eat, shower, and sleep. In a blue moon she'll want to be at home but usually she's all about out and about.

When I was little (around 2 or maybe 3) we lived with my grandparents, there was 1 car for the whole family and mom didn't have her license at the time anyways. So one day grandma and grandpa are headed to the grocery store and mom asks if we can go with cause she's climbing the wall, my grandma asks me if I want to go grocery shopping and I say no (cause I'm like 2 and wanna stay with my toys and my big bird movie and I'm 2), grandma says "Well Glitter doesn't want to go, so you have to stay home with her" and off grandparents go with me and mom at home.

I have heard this story about a million times at this point. Usually after being called a "home body" in tone that does not indicate that's a positve personality trait. Basically rather then being mad with her mother who took the wants of the 2 year old over the wants of the other adult, she still mad at the one who was 2. And BTW it's not like when the got me out of the house I was a fit throwing kid. According to my mom, I had all of 2 meltdowns before the age of 5 out in public. I was usually pretty content, and easy to entertain with a picture book or just people watching (same way still, just most of my books have words now).

I tend to be introverted, I can be very social, outgoing and no one describes me as shy (quiet yes, shy no), but I need time alone, I'm an observer, I loath small talk (I do it, but I hate it), and having to socialize for too long with too many people stresses me out to no end and makes me really long from my PJs and my home. My mother is very extroverted. Loves big groups and gatherings, likes to be the life of the party, is always talking, so on and so forth. She still sees my introverted ways as something to fix. I need to be more social, out of the house more, more like her! She's been convinced several times that I'm depressed. I'm not. At all. I'm a generally happy person.

You're like me.  I'm a bit more extroverted, but I also need time to myself.  I like people.  But I like them less if I haven't had my me time.

Shalamar

  • Hero Member
  • ***
  • Posts: 1277
Re: Ridiculous things your parents criticize you about
« Reply #471 on: September 27, 2013, 05:04:41 PM »
Oo oo, that reminds me of when I was 7 years old.  It was summertime, and my mother was called into work unexpectedly (normally she worked part-time, and on the days she worked, she'd get a babysitter.  She wasn't able to get a babysitter on such short notice this time, though).  She called up a family friend and asked if she'd take me for the day.  Friend was more than happy to do so.

The trouble is, Friend - although a VERY nice lady - was (a) old and (b) had never had children, so she had no idea how to entertain me.  I was a very easygoing child and would happily have stayed in a bedroom all day long with my toys and books, coming out only for lunch and potty breaks.  Friend didn't get that, though - she'd envisioned a day of being with me CONSTANTLY and hearing my childish chatter for hours on end, and by God, that was what she was going to get.

So, she set us up outside in her back yard with chairs and an umbrella, a book for me and a magazine for her, and that was it for entertainment.  I was very quickly bored out of my mind and wanted to go play with my toys.  (Plus, I was hot and uncomfortable.  I've never been a sun-worshipper.)  I asked if I could go inside to play.  Friend said no.  I asked if I could go inside to use the bathroom, and THAT was okay.  Thing is, I saw my toys on the way to the bathroom, and I thought "Just five minutes won't hurt."  Five minutes turned into fifteen, and next thing I knew, Friend was standing there with a puzzled hurt expression.

All I heard on the way home from my mother was how much I'd hurt Friend's feelings, and saying "But I was BORED!" didn't cut any ice with my mother.

Piratelvr1121

  • Super Hero!
  • ****
  • Posts: 11362
Re: Ridiculous things your parents criticize you about
« Reply #472 on: September 27, 2013, 05:43:41 PM »
I can relate.  I was more than happy to just sit at home and read, or write or just listen to music and think.  I didn't mind being alone, and sometimes my mom would come in and tell me to go outside, get some fresh air. 

I'd say "Okay", grab my book or just myself and go out for a walk or a bike ride.  Other times she'd insist I call up a friend. I think she was really worried that I didn't have oodles of friends but I always was just fine with having quality over quantity.  And I don't know what it is but ever since I was a kid, my best friends were never close to me, geographically except for once. 

My childhood bff lived in the same state, but another county and a half hour's drive away.  Not a lot unless you're a kid that can't drive yet.  Then I got older and I did make a very good friend while DH was in the marines and it was great having a friend who lived on the same base as I did.  We were both night owls and would sometimes meet up for a midnight snack at Denny's so we could talk freely. :) I miss that, but unfortunately we moved across the country, but we are still in touch, thankfully. :)

And there's also my other bff who's in the midwest and that is the closest one geographically. :P
Beyond a wholesome discipline, be gentle with yourself. You are a child of the universe, no less than the trees and the stars.  You have a right to be here. Be cheerful, strive to be happy. -Desiderata

GlitterIsMyDrug

  • Hero Member
  • ***
  • Posts: 1120
Re: Ridiculous things your parents criticize you about
« Reply #473 on: September 27, 2013, 05:48:01 PM »
Oo oo, that reminds me of when I was 7 years old.  It was summertime, and my mother was called into work unexpectedly (normally she worked part-time, and on the days she worked, she'd get a babysitter.  She wasn't able to get a babysitter on such short notice this time, though).  She called up a family friend and asked if she'd take me for the day.  Friend was more than happy to do so.

The trouble is, Friend - although a VERY nice lady - was (a) old and (b) had never had children, so she had no idea how to entertain me.  I was a very easygoing child and would happily have stayed in a bedroom all day long with my toys and books, coming out only for lunch and potty breaks.  Friend didn't get that, though - she'd envisioned a day of being with me CONSTANTLY and hearing my childish chatter for hours on end, and by God, that was what she was going to get.

So, she set us up outside in her back yard with chairs and an umbrella, a book for me and a magazine for her, and that was it for entertainment.  I was very quickly bored out of my mind and wanted to go play with my toys.  (Plus, I was hot and uncomfortable.  I've never been a sun-worshipper.)  I asked if I could go inside to play.  Friend said no.  I asked if I could go inside to use the bathroom, and THAT was okay.  Thing is, I saw my toys on the way to the bathroom, and I thought "Just five minutes won't hurt."  Five minutes turned into fifteen, and next thing I knew, Friend was standing there with a puzzled hurt expression.

All I heard on the way home from my mother was how much I'd hurt Friend's feelings, and saying "But I was BORED!" didn't cut any ice with my mother.

But your job was to entertain her! How dare you not do so!

I was always content to play alone. I was an only child, so most of the time I was in charge of keeping myself occupied and I did so quiet well. Other adults could never undestand because "other kids" were loud, talketive, disruptive, ect. I was, as my aunt described me on multiable occassions "like a little adult" (this was a positive thing from her, I was the only kid she liked). Other adults would tell my mom there was "something wrong" with me. And I was developmentally behind my peers (actually I was ahead of them, thus why I was often annoyed by them). My mom would just smile and nod. Once she said to one woman, whose sons had been kicked out of a resturant for being too disurptive (it was a family resturant to give you an idea of what their behavior was like), after the woman had critized how quiet and poliet I was (something terribly wrong with me) "Yes, I'd much rather a child who swings from chandliers then one who says please and thank you, that makes complete sense", we didn't hang out with her or her kids anymore.

Asharah

  • Hero Member
  • ***
  • Posts: 3948
Re: Ridiculous things your parents criticize you about
« Reply #474 on: September 28, 2013, 04:19:11 PM »
Oo oo, that reminds me of when I was 7 years old.  It was summertime, and my mother was called into work unexpectedly (normally she worked part-time, and on the days she worked, she'd get a babysitter.  She wasn't able to get a babysitter on such short notice this time, though).  She called up a family friend and asked if she'd take me for the day.  Friend was more than happy to do so.

The trouble is, Friend - although a VERY nice lady - was (a) old and (b) had never had children, so she had no idea how to entertain me.  I was a very easygoing child and would happily have stayed in a bedroom all day long with my toys and books, coming out only for lunch and potty breaks.  Friend didn't get that, though - she'd envisioned a day of being with me CONSTANTLY and hearing my childish chatter for hours on end, and by God, that was what she was going to get.

So, she set us up outside in her back yard with chairs and an umbrella, a book for me and a magazine for her, and that was it for entertainment.  I was very quickly bored out of my mind and wanted to go play with my toys.  (Plus, I was hot and uncomfortable.  I've never been a sun-worshipper.)  I asked if I could go inside to play.  Friend said no.  I asked if I could go inside to use the bathroom, and THAT was okay.  Thing is, I saw my toys on the way to the bathroom, and I thought "Just five minutes won't hurt."  Five minutes turned into fifteen, and next thing I knew, Friend was standing there with a puzzled hurt expression.

All I heard on the way home from my mother was how much I'd hurt Friend's feelings, and saying "But I was BORED!" didn't cut any ice with my mother.
I wonder what would have happened if as soon as Mom shown up you had greeted her with, "Friend was mean! She made me stay outside and it was HOT! And she wouldn't let me play with my toys all day!"  ;D
Asharah

magician5

  • Hero Member
  • ***
  • Posts: 3490
Re: Ridiculous things your parents criticize you about
« Reply #475 on: September 28, 2013, 05:04:30 PM »
Wonder what your grandmother would've said about my brother dressing me in boy's clothes when I was a toddler.  He couldn't get over the fact I wasn't born male, so he tried to turn me into a boy by dressing me in boy clothes and using his military toys to teach me how to play "war."  It didn't work, and I think he resented me ever since for not being a boy.

I was watching a show about Baden-Powell, founder of Scouting, hero of the Boer War, "manly man" of the early 20th Century. They showed a photo of him as a toddler ... as was apparently the custom at the time, the boy was in a foofy dress with girly curls, indistinguishable from a little girl. I don't know why that was the custom, but he seemed to have grown up without gender issues (even if he was a fairly odd bird as an adult).
« Last Edit: September 28, 2013, 05:07:07 PM by magician5 »
There is no 'way to peace.' Peace is the way.

Elfmama

  • Super Hero!
  • ****
  • Posts: 6228
Re: Ridiculous things your parents criticize you about
« Reply #476 on: September 28, 2013, 07:12:59 PM »
Wonder what your grandmother would've said about my brother dressing me in boy's clothes when I was a toddler.  He couldn't get over the fact I wasn't born male, so he tried to turn me into a boy by dressing me in boy clothes and using his military toys to teach me how to play "war."  It didn't work, and I think he resented me ever since for not being a boy.

I was watching a show about Baden-Powell, founder of Scouting, hero of the Boer War, "manly man" of the early 20th Century. They showed a photo of him as a toddler ... as was apparently the custom at the time, the boy was in a foofy dress with girly curls, indistinguishable from a little girl. I don't know why that was the custom, but he seemed to have grown up without gender issues (even if he was a fairly odd bird as an adult).
They kept little boys in dresses until they were reliably potty-trained.  Easier to access the, er, working bits, you know.  And when a boy graduated to pants, it was a big ceremonial occasion.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
It's true. Money can't buy happiness.  You have to turn it
into books first.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Yvaine

  • Super Hero!
  • ****
  • Posts: 9015
Re: Ridiculous things your parents criticize you about
« Reply #477 on: September 28, 2013, 07:37:21 PM »
How I dress was always problematic.  Once I wore a red sweater with a khaki skirt.  I was just out of college and had bought myself these clothes with my meager earnings, and I was pretty proud of the outfit.  My father was so appalled that I wore red with khaki (???) that he had to tell me off about it at length twice.  Twice. 

I had no idea red and khaki was so offensive. I love this combination, but khaki is really not my colour.

Does this mean I need to be upset with my son who just came downstairs in khaki pants and a red shirt? I think he looks rather nice. ;)

That combo is the official uniform of my niece's school.

parrot_girl

  • Member
  • **
  • Posts: 186
Re: Ridiculous things your parents criticize you about
« Reply #478 on: September 28, 2013, 09:35:15 PM »
My mum is a wonderful woman, let me be the first to say this. But there are some times that she should really engage her brain before her mouth, such as the time she told me that she'd be far happier if I were a third of my current weight.
Now I admit that I am quite overweight, but losing two thirds of my weight would put me at five kilograms above my six year old daughter. Who is as skinny as a bean!

Mum did admit that this was an idiotic idea, and apologised. And then she added "Maybe at half your current weight then?"
sigh!

Piratelvr1121

  • Super Hero!
  • ****
  • Posts: 11362
Re: Ridiculous things your parents criticize you about
« Reply #479 on: September 28, 2013, 10:12:25 PM »
Wonder what your grandmother would've said about my brother dressing me in boy's clothes when I was a toddler.  He couldn't get over the fact I wasn't born male, so he tried to turn me into a boy by dressing me in boy clothes and using his military toys to teach me how to play "war."  It didn't work, and I think he resented me ever since for not being a boy.

I was watching a show about Baden-Powell, founder of Scouting, hero of the Boer War, "manly man" of the early 20th Century. They showed a photo of him as a toddler ... as was apparently the custom at the time, the boy was in a foofy dress with girly curls, indistinguishable from a little girl. I don't know why that was the custom, but he seemed to have grown up without gender issues (even if he was a fairly odd bird as an adult).
They kept little boys in dresses until they were reliably potty-trained.  Easier to access the, er, working bits, you know.  And when a boy graduated to pants, it was a big ceremonial occasion.

I recall similar pictures of boys in paintings from the colonial era as well as the Victorian. 
Beyond a wholesome discipline, be gentle with yourself. You are a child of the universe, no less than the trees and the stars.  You have a right to be here. Be cheerful, strive to be happy. -Desiderata