Etiquette School is in session! > "I'm afraid that won't be possible."

So you want me to pay more, when I've already paid less?

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So, a little update. The wedding isn't until March, but boy has it been a fun ride so far! MOB has completely forgotten about my used dress. Because there are much much bigger problems. Mainly another bridesmaid! She announced her pregnancy early last month (or maybe end of October? I honestly can't remember) and she's already starting to show, she's due in late May, so at a March wedding, you bet your bippy she's gonna be showing. Big time.

Bride was totally cool, the dresses we have aren't very forgiving to a growing baby bump, so she suggested to pregnant bridesmaid, she go ahead and pick something similar in style/color that will accommodate her bump. And also to let her know if closer to the wedding she'd prefer to sit out or maybe sit down during the ceremony, if she felt like she needed too. She was very reassuring saying "I'm not kicking you out of my wedding, not at all! I just want you to do what makes you comfortable, you're bring a human into the world, that's pretty important".

MOB on the other hand, went a bit nutty. It's not actually that she's pregnant, MOB is able to see that our lives don't stop turning her for her daughter's wedding, it's that she's pregnant and not married. And what will people think. She's not with the father either and is planning on attending the wedding by herself. And well MOB is Mrs "What will people think!", it's 2013, they're thinking nothing. This is hardly shocking anymore. She tried asking me if I had new any nice men who could accompany her so people wouldn't ask, or if she'd be willing to wear a fake ring and tell people her husband was "away", both  we're answered with "No" (in that, are you crazy? tone). So now MOB is wringing her hands over this very worried what people will think.

The upside, this is much bigger to focus on then flowers, dresses, or why they aren't picking more expensive things. So HC is able to do whatever they darn well please while MOB frets over the unwed pregnant girl. Though she is concerned about me and Partner wearing our engagement rings because she isn't sure how she'll explain us to her friends. Bride told her "Mom, just tell them they're just like Portia and Ellen, your friends like Portia and Ellen", and that quieted her down for a while at least.

Crazy drama! And even if guests cared about unwed mothers or same-sex partners, I don't even know if that would come up in conversation. There's so much going on during a wedding. People chit-chat and they don't always have their significant others standing right next to them. Guests are walking around, eating, socializing, dancing.

I imagine the only true conversations that happen are at the dinner table. And it's highly likely that the unwed pregnant lady and you will be at the same table as the bride, so you all know each others' stories anyway.

The MOB should be glad that you two are in the bridal party so that you're not, you know, Heaven forbid (sarcasm) sitting and mingling in with the general crowd!

That poor MOB. It must be really difficult living in her head with all the worrying about what other people will think [about her]. It's a shame that she can't see that no one is going to judge her for the choices her daughter's friends make.

Mel the Redcap:

Oh Noes! The Horror! ::)

If the MOB's friends are like her, maybe they will be thinking scandalised thoughts... and that will be entirely their own problem. :P Maybe tell her that if she doesn't actually tell anyone what's 'wrong', they probably won't notice?

I can't believe K's mum was upset over a dress that you'll only wear once!
Why would it matter to her whether the dress came from goodwill or the bridal shop, as long as it's clean and the exact style, who cares!


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