But make no mistake about it. Most "normal" people don't like having plans changed on them unexpectedly, especially when the changes include spending close quarters and intimate time with someone you either don't know or don't especially like.
Ah, see, this may or may not be correct....If you are an extroverted person who does not like planning, then you probably would like "the more the merrier". If you are introverted and like to plan (like many people here on e-hell), then it would drive you crazy.
But what is interesting to me is the friend did this to herself. She felt guilty that she was going camping without Bossypants so she invited Bossypants.
For the record, I'm an event planner, so therefore I'm an extrovert who likes to plan. So are all of the event planners I know. Not an introvert in the bunch. My dh is an introvert who does not plan at all. So I think the extrovert/introvert dichotomy in terms of planning is a red herring.
Well, I think there are two elements--they don't have to match up, so that you have two dichotomies--extrovert/introvert and planner/non-planner.
Extrovert/non-planner: more the merrier, thinks nothing wrong w/ inviting someone else to join in on activity/event
Extrovert/planner: more the merrier, but must plan on inviting people either from the outset or after consulting w/ original invitees about an addition
Introvert/non-planner: does not want to include extra people, but may be able to take spontaneous changes ok
Introvert/planner: doesn't want to include extras, wants things planned out, spontaneous changes are *not* ok
I think the planning/non-planning is related to one of the different dichotomies in the Myers-Briggs. I know that for me, just the adding of another person would probably make me want to not participate, even if it was planned.
Example--Im' an introvert-planner: my brother got married in another state. My parents live about 3 hrs drive from me, but going direct from where they live to my brother's is 12 hrs, while it is 10 hrs from my place to brother's (basically, I'm almost due south of my parents, brother is south east to them and almost directly east to me). Original plan: my parents were going to come get me, we would drive to brother's, two hotel rooms, theirs and mine. Then they changed to adding a friend of brother's from their town and two rooms, dad sharing w/ friend, mom sharing w/ me. I started to say 'well ok' but was *really* unhappy. So then I decided "I'm a grown up, I can pay my way, I am *not* going to put up with wanting to cry because of this change" (that's really how bad it was, just the thought of sharing the ride for 10 hrs w/ a stranger-to-me--my brother is 7 years younger than I am, so I was out of the house when he was in high school where he met this friend--friend came over to parents' house a lot so not a stranger to my parents). So, I ended up renting my own car, we both drove separately, I got my own motel room, etc. But even knowing ahead of time the plan was something I just couldn't cope w/ because of the lengthy time w/ a stranger.
I'm glad all has worked out for the OP.