Author Topic: You're in my spot..  (Read 6455 times)

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bopper

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Re: You're in my spot..
« Reply #30 on: September 25, 2013, 09:19:12 AM »

Be nice, remember that people aren't inconveniencing you on purpose. Just say, "I'm sorry--can I have my chair? I find it's the only comfortable one for me." And wait patiently. If they say, "oh, but you left!" or anything else, repeat, "This is the only comfortable chair for me, that's why I bought it." And wait.



This. Friendly but firm.

fidelejavert

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Re: You're in my spot..
« Reply #31 on: September 25, 2013, 09:34:43 AM »
Another perspective: is it possible that other people are sitting in your chair because they want to talk with those sitting nearby? Maybe they felt awkward moving your chair to substitute their own? I don't think those sitting in your chair are necessarily being rude.

However, I do think it's fine to ask for your chair, although it might be rude if you made them leave that spot in the middle of their conversation to go somewhere else. You can have the chair, but not necessarily the spot.

Zilla

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Re: You're in my spot..
« Reply #32 on: September 25, 2013, 09:44:56 AM »
"Sorry, can I have my chair? The other ones hurt my back."


You know, I actually love this, given the audience of the past weekend. We all love BBT, so the reference would definitely not be lost. And I'm kind of the Sheldon in my family anyway..

Thanks for the responses! I always feel a little SS insisting on my particular chair, but it really is the only one I can be comfortable in for more than about 10 minutes.


I like this response too, but I would also do an "elaborate" version of your name on both the front and back of the chair.  That way it's eye catching.  Plus could you leave something on it like a sweater/drink/hat etc on it as well?

bopper

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Re: You're in my spot..
« Reply #33 on: September 26, 2013, 09:32:09 AM »
The real question is:  What brand of chair is it?

Momiitz

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Re: You're in my spot..
« Reply #34 on: September 26, 2013, 09:47:17 AM »
Quote

I don't really understand this logic. If people want a chair to sit on for the weekend, they should bring their own. If everyone brings their own, why would there ever be any need to sit in someone else's chair? It's not like these chairs cost a fortune. They are really pretty cheap. If your chair is in the sun and you want to sit in the shade, move it. It's not necessary to sit in someone else's chair, just put your chair where you want it to be.

Now, if it's a situation of people not bringing their own and expecting to sit in someone else's chair all weekend, well then... too bad so sad. When I return to the campfire from wherever I've been, I want to sit in my own chair. If you brought your chair, then go sit in it. If you didn't bring one and are just figuring to use other peoples' then go sit in some other chair till its owner returns.

I just don't see anything at all wrong with saying, This is my chair and I want to sit in it, and expecting the person to vacate. In my opinion, no one should be sitting in my chair in the first place. They can move my chair out of the way if I'm not in it, but they should be sitting in their own chair.

I agree 100% with this. It's my chair, I brought it, I want to sit in it. I will be polite in asking you to move but I will not JADE except to say that's my chair.

MrTango

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Re: You're in my spot..
« Reply #35 on: September 26, 2013, 09:52:13 AM »
Another option the OP might consider, since it is a folding chair:

Whenever you get up out of your chair for more than a couple minutes, fold it up.

Momiitz

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Re: You're in my spot..
« Reply #36 on: September 26, 2013, 09:52:39 AM »
I had to leave early from a camping trip.  The the folding chairs rhat came home with VorGuy were not the two chairs I took, new from the store.  One was not even a match to the case...at least the right tent and sleeping bags came home - with me.

He claims that he got what was left - next time I go there will be names on our (new) chairs.

I'm sorry your chairs got taken by others in your group. I would send an email to the group and request your chairs back from the person(s) who accidentally took them. Hopefully it was just a mix up and the group member who has them does not know who they belong to.

Outdoor Girl

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Re: You're in my spot..
« Reply #37 on: September 26, 2013, 09:53:09 AM »
The real question is:  What brand of chair is it?

I don't know what chair the OP bought but if you are in Canada or near the border, Mark's (Work Wearhouse) has a new one out that is the one I really like.  It takes a weight up to 300 lbs, has a very sturdy seat and arms, supports my back really well and has a drink pocket that clips onto the side of it.  It folds up but not as small as the cheaper ones.

Wait for it to go on sale, though.  Even then, it is a bit pricey.  But you can't put a price on limiting back pain, IMO.
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VorFemme

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Re: You're in my spot..
« Reply #38 on: September 26, 2013, 10:29:31 AM »
I had to leave early from a camping trip.  The the folding chairs rhat came home with VorGuy were not the two chairs I took, new from the store.  One was not even a match to the case...at least the right tent and sleeping bags came home - with me.

He claims that he got what was left - next time I go there will be names on our (new) chairs.

I'm sorry your chairs got taken by others in your group. I would send an email to the group and request your chairs back from the person(s) who accidentally took them. Hopefully it was just a mix up and the group member who has them does not know who they belong to.

It's been three years - he is happy enough with the chairs that he brought back (cheap chairs).  It is a different group every year - so getting back the original (cheap) chairs is not high enough on my priority list to bother with.

But labeling any future chairs is going to happen so we don't go through the same thing again.
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ladyknight1

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Re: You're in my spot..
« Reply #39 on: September 26, 2013, 10:59:10 AM »
Mine are similar to these, I have three (one for each of us) in different colors. I asked DH last night to pick up some stencils for me!

http://www.target.com/p/travel-chair-blue/-/A-10906627#prodSlot=medium_1_47&term=chair

Yvaine

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Re: You're in my spot..
« Reply #40 on: September 26, 2013, 11:03:05 AM »
I think it depends very much on the situation. 

In some environments - especially around the fire - seats are very communal...X number of people, X number of chairs, and people come and go throughout the weekend.  Chairs get moved around to accommodate number of people, temperature, sun, smoke, etc. and none really belong to any individuals except people tend to sit in their own if it's available.  In these circumstances, if you (all 'you's general) leave your chair to get a drink or use the facilities, then it's still yours when you come back.  If you go take a nap or a hike, you select from the available seats when you get back.  If you want your furniture to be available when you return, remove it from the common area when you leave, then place it in the best available location when you return.  You don't get to reserve a location by leaving your property there, or make people remember it's yours and leave it empty or move it out of the way when trying to sit near each other to talk or sit the best distance from the fire.  In short, don't leave it in the common area if it's not for common use.

Part of etiquette is understanding norms and accommodating them as much as is practical, so I believe your answer really depends on the group.

I don't really understand this logic. If people want a chair to sit on for the weekend, they should bring their own. If everyone brings their own, why would there ever be any need to sit in someone else's chair? It's not like these chairs cost a fortune. They are really pretty cheap. If your chair is in the sun and you want to sit in the shade, move it. It's not necessary to sit in someone else's chair, just put your chair where you want it to be.

Now, if it's a situation of people not bringing their own and expecting to sit in someone else's chair all weekend, well then... too bad so sad. When I return to the campfire from wherever I've been, I want to sit in my own chair. If you brought your chair, then go sit in it. If you didn't bring one and are just figuring to use other peoples' then go sit in some other chair till its owner returns.

I just don't see anything at all wrong with saying, This is my chair and I want to sit in it, and expecting the person to vacate. In my opinion, no one should be sitting in my chair in the first place. They can move my chair out of the way if I'm not in it, but they should be sitting in their own chair.

POD

I am very active in outdoor activities and spend a lot of time in areas where your bring your chair or your don't sit. They are not communal unless provided by the group, IME.

This. Certainly at big camping events I've seen people steal each other's chairs briefly--like if there are only two people at the fire and you want to talk to someone who parked their chair fifteen feet away from your own chair--but there's the expectation that you get back out of it if you see the chair's owner coming.

Oh Joy

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Re: You're in my spot..
« Reply #41 on: September 26, 2013, 11:44:36 AM »
I think it depends very much on the situation. 

In some environments - especially around the fire - seats are very communal...X number of people, X number of chairs, and people come and go throughout the weekend.  Chairs get moved around to accommodate number of people, temperature, sun, smoke, etc. and none really belong to any individuals except people tend to sit in their own if it's available.  In these circumstances, if you (all 'you's general) leave your chair to get a drink or use the facilities, then it's still yours when you come back.  If you go take a nap or a hike, you select from the available seats when you get back.  If you want your furniture to be available when you return, remove it from the common area when you leave, then place it in the best available location when you return.  You don't get to reserve a location by leaving your property there, or make people remember it's yours and leave it empty or move it out of the way when trying to sit near each other to talk or sit the best distance from the fire.  In short, don't leave it in the common area if it's not for common use.

Part of etiquette is understanding norms and accommodating them as much as is practical, so I believe your answer really depends on the group.

I don't really understand this logic. If people want a chair to sit on for the weekend, they should bring their own. If everyone brings their own, why would there ever be any need to sit in someone else's chair? It's not like these chairs cost a fortune. They are really pretty cheap. If your chair is in the sun and you want to sit in the shade, move it. It's not necessary to sit in someone else's chair, just put your chair where you want it to be.

Now, if it's a situation of people not bringing their own and expecting to sit in someone else's chair all weekend, well then... too bad so sad. When I return to the campfire from wherever I've been, I want to sit in my own chair. If you brought your chair, then go sit in it. If you didn't bring one and are just figuring to use other peoples' then go sit in some other chair till its owner returns.

I just don't see anything at all wrong with saying, This is my chair and I want to sit in it, and expecting the person to vacate. In my opinion, no one should be sitting in my chair in the first place. They can move my chair out of the way if I'm not in it, but they should be sitting in their own chair.

POD

I am very active in outdoor activities and spend a lot of time in areas where your bring your chair or your don't sit. They are not communal unless provided by the group, IME.

This. Certainly at big camping events I've seen people steal each other's chairs briefly--like if there are only two people at the fire and you want to talk to someone who parked their chair fifteen feet away from your own chair--but there's the expectation that you get back out of it if you see the chair's owner coming.

Yep - I've seen those kinds of dynamics as well.  But I have been with groups where the norm is for everyone to bring one chair and (ideally!) leave with the same chair, but during the weekend it doesn't matter whose chair is where because there are enough for all.

Not saying that's the only or best way, just sharing that this may be the experience of some others in the OP's situation...to understand that it's not even considered 'stealing' in some circles.

WillyNilly

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Re: You're in my spot..
« Reply #42 on: September 26, 2013, 11:53:07 AM »
I have two separate circles of friends who camp or have bring your chair lawn parties. In both sets everyone brings chairs (enough for themselves and maybe even a extra if they have one). The chairs are set around the firepit or the lawn and they are considered communal for the entire duration of the event, anyone can sit in any chair at anytime, because there are always enough chairs for everyone, so specifics aren't really considered. Especially since chairs do get moved, and many of these folding chairs look almost exactly the same (especially once it gets dark and/or the beer comes out).

If someone had a specific chair they brought and they needed to sit in, it wouldn't be a problem for them to communicate that, but under no circumstances would it be some automatic thing where people automatically knew to get up and give someone back a chair.

People sit in various chairs that aren't necessarily their own for all sorts of reasons - to sit near someone they are having a conversation with, because half the group is off doing something else and the few people left want to sit together, to move out of the line of smoke from the fire, to move out of or into the shade/sun, because it was the first empty chair they came to, etc.

cwm

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Re: You're in my spot..
« Reply #43 on: September 26, 2013, 12:06:49 PM »
I've been in a lot of group camping situations. Mostly several families together, and my dad always made sure our family had well-made comfortable chairs. Nobody else did, they had the cheap chairs, and frequently their chairs were falling apart. I actually finalized a rift between families (there were lots of previous issues, this was the biggest) when I ended up having my mom haul a guy out of the chair I had just got the week before for a birthday present because he wouldn't get out of it. (I was 12 at the time, guy had this attitude that anything that he wanted was his and kids could scrounge for leftovers.)

OP, it is your chair. You paid for it. Politely remind people of that fact. By all means, let them know where they can get their own if they ask, but you are under no obligation to provide chairs for other people.

Minmom3

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Re: You're in my spot..
« Reply #44 on: September 26, 2013, 12:08:21 PM »
Mine are similar to these, I have three (one for each of us) in different colors. I asked DH last night to pick up some stencils for me!

http://www.target.com/p/travel-chair-blue/-/A-10906627#prodSlot=medium_1_47&term=chair

I think I got mine at Michael's, or at a local quilt store that HAD a good selection of stencils.  For my own chair, however, I made one out of a manila folder and an exacto knife, after tracing the letters from my pre-owned plastic stencils.  Going to Fair that year, I had a LOT of stuff to stencil - tack boxes, milking stand, chair, etc.  The manila folder worked perfectly for me, through at least 2 dozen useages!
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