That's a good point. And the same with the food. They're wasted either way, if I'm not enjoying them.
Exactly. It's not like the food will magically hop a jet to a famine zone if you try to eat it when you don't want it. All you'll end up with is extra calories for no enjoyment, which is a lousy arrangement.
And, I think it's not
wasted, if it prompts someone to have a good conversation with their spouse about buying/not buying certain things for them. I like TootsNYC's wording on that subject.
I'm reminded of the time my dad brought me a piece of furniture for my tiny apartment. I don't know what he was thinking. I literally had no room for it unless it stood in the middle of the kitchen or something. And, it was something really nice that I really wanted in a general sense. So I was a bit angry that he was offering me something I wanted that realistically I couldn't accept, and guilty that I was going to disappoint him by turning it down, and disappointed myself that I couldn't have it, and lots of other things.
I said, "Oh, this is so great. It's so beautiful. I can't accept it, though. I don't have anywhere to put it. Thank you for thinking of me." Kind of alternating between thanking him for the idea, and emphasizing that it wasn't going to work and I wasn't going to accept it (as it would have been a massive inconvenience for me to deal with). It never left his truck. I don't know what happened to it. I figured that was his problem to deal with, for getting this thing without consulting me first. But I tried to focus on the intent behind the gift, even if it wasn't well thought out. (And I did at one point ask if he had any thoughts about where it would go, in case he had seen some space that I was overlooking, but he didn't.)