And maybe the thing EtiquetteHell can help us with is to encourage us to NOT feel that we have to make that dish.
We can say, "Oh, I hadn't planned on it," and not make it. We can say, "Oh, you like that? I'll have to see," and then not make it.
With the encouragement of one another, maybe we can get more tothe point where we say, if only to ourselves, "I'm glad they really like that dish, but I'm not a restaurant, so I'm not going to make it."