Author Topic: Another wedding gimmie pig  (Read 5547 times)

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bonyk

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Another wedding gimmie pig
« on: October 04, 2013, 05:37:33 PM »
http://t.living.msn.com/love-relationships/bride-doesnt-want-guests-attending-her-wedding-for-free-so-dont-forget-your-checkbook-1

Summary: Bride tells guest (via text) that she expects money in her wedding card.  Guest replays that she was recently laid off.  Bride tells guest that she cannot come to wedding for free.  Guest writes bride a letter with a penny in it, and calls bride out for her rude behavior.

So, obviously Bride is beyond rude.  What do people think of Guest's response?

Edit:  the link has to be copied/pasted due to the word relationship in the URL.

Lynn2000

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Re: Another wedding gimmie pig
« Reply #1 on: October 04, 2013, 05:40:47 PM »
Bride: I expect money in my wedding card from you!
Guest: Sorry, I won't be able to attend the wedding. [doesn't send wedding card/gift, either]

Well, that's one possible way to handle it, anyway. Sometimes it's very satisfying to call someone out, but I don't think I'd do it personally.

ETA: I followed the link and read the actual story, and now I'm just kind of confused. Maybe it's because I don't understand text-speak? In the big blue bubble, from the slighted friend, I thought she was actually a little snarky. "Had I known that four parties were going to be held in your honor this year, I would have saved [the money] all up and given it to you in a lump sum..."

Point 3 I just don't understand. The bride says, "Ok but it's still something instead u coming for free ya know." I'll take a gift instead OF you coming for free? I dunno, some people might read that as joking.

Point 4 could be read as the bride/mom-to-be trying to be considerate of her friend, albeit in a ham-handed way--"You just said you're tight on money, should I not add to your pressure by inviting you to my baby shower?" I see threads here often with people asking basically the same thing--should I invite or not invite my cash-strapped friend to a gift-giving occasion? And most people suggest they be invited, I think, but obviously this answer is not always apparent to well-meaning people.
« Last Edit: October 04, 2013, 05:56:33 PM by Lynn2000 »
~Lynn2000

LeveeWoman

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Re: Another wedding gimmie pig
« Reply #2 on: October 04, 2013, 05:52:44 PM »
She's already had four parties/showers? And, will be having a baby shower in November for which there will be no invitation unless the woman has money?

Lorelei_Evil

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Re: Another wedding gimmie pig
« Reply #3 on: October 04, 2013, 05:54:59 PM »
I wish I could say I were surprised, but I'm not.  Surprised, not at all.  APPALLED, yes.

flickan

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Re: Another wedding gimmie pig
« Reply #4 on: October 04, 2013, 05:57:25 PM »
The bride is obviously rude, that whole story leaves a bad taste in my mouth.

But the guest is being childish.

There's no need to tape a penny to a long letter.  Simply saying, "I'm sorry, I cannot afford this," would have sufficed.  If the bride wants to call the guest out for it then she's only making herself look worse and worse.  If the bride wants to uninvite the guest it's on her.  When someone behaves badly and you get self-righteous you are only opening yourself up to criticism.

Jones

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Re: Another wedding gimmie pig
« Reply #5 on: October 04, 2013, 06:15:30 PM »
Wait, she has a pretty card that's misplaced and the bride says, Oh where is my card? It could really help with bills.

That's just a jump to conclusions right there, and phrasing the thought at all is...well, as the letter says, "classless and tacky."

*inviteseller

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Re: Another wedding gimmie pig
« Reply #6 on: October 04, 2013, 08:00:47 PM »
So, the bride is having a fundraiser instead of a wedding?  I wonder how many of these text messages she sent and how many others declined the opportunity to join in the festivius shakedown?  Why has the traditional wedding gone from a joyous occasion for people you love to share in the day you marry your best friend to such muggings???

TootsNYC

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Re: Another wedding gimmie pig
« Reply #7 on: October 04, 2013, 08:56:45 PM »
When someone behaves badly and you get self-righteous you are only opening yourself up to criticism.

I'm with you.

The whole thing was awful.

mbbored

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Re: Another wedding gimmie pig
« Reply #8 on: October 05, 2013, 12:20:26 PM »
While the guest's response was not exactly polite, it hardly compares to the bride's greed and rudeness.

bonyk

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Re: Another wedding gimmie pig
« Reply #9 on: October 05, 2013, 12:40:39 PM »
One point from the article:  the shakedown was actually occurring after the wedding, so the Guest could not express her displeasure by not attending.

something.new.every.day

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Re: Another wedding gimmie pig
« Reply #10 on: October 05, 2013, 12:48:53 PM »
Just by the info. in the letter, it sounds like they are were close enough friends where the bride could have said, "Please don't worry about a wedding gift, and please come to my shower but don't you dare spend any money on a gift."  Being as they shared everything with each other (lost job/unexpected bills/etc.) I think it's OK to speak frankly, though you wouldn't do that with just anyone.  Of course the bride in question is a horrible person, so it would not occur to her to say that. 

The guest was also rude, and though I'm sure it felt good for her to get it out, that's the kind of letter you write to get it out of your system and then destroy.  However, did anyone notice this line in the letter?  "I've tried to remain a supportive, loving friend by keeping your secrets to myself."  Something tells me the bride won't retaliate as the guest must be holding something over her head. 

What drama! 

nuit93

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Re: Another wedding gimmie pig
« Reply #11 on: October 06, 2013, 06:13:34 PM »
I really want to buy said Guest a drink.  She's better off without the bride as a friend.

StoutGirl

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Re: Another wedding gimmie pig
« Reply #12 on: October 06, 2013, 09:59:59 PM »
Whoops!  I just posted this to the wedding board, but thank you for posting!  I am not sure if the guest did the right thing, but that bride sure sounded nasty.  Reading the comments by other readers was very enjoyable and I was glad to see them being very supportive of the guest.

shhh its me

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Re: Another wedding gimmie pig
« Reply #13 on: October 07, 2013, 12:10:34 AM »
  We all know the bride was rude.

I'm not sure about the guest at some point you can actually tell someone why you wont be speaking to them again. I think some of the things she brought up were over the line but the concept "I am ending our relationship , this is why."  is acceptable.

Mediancat

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Re: Another wedding gimmie pig
« Reply #14 on: October 07, 2013, 08:18:00 AM »
The principal of comparative rudeness strikes again. The guest may have been a but rude, but it would have required them walking up to the bride and beating her up to match the bride's level of etiquette violation.

Rob
"In all of mankind's history, there has never been more damage done than by someone who 'thought they were doing the right thing'." -- Lucy, Peanuts