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Author Topic: How do we feel about getting older?  (Read 7831 times)

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How do we feel about getting older?
« on: October 04, 2013, 07:49:20 PM »
In the 'Stupid Question' thread, a poster asked when to expect to be 'over the hill'

My thought is that 40 and 50 are fun, after that it's just pity points, and I hope that you all can expect and enjoy the jokes at those ages.

I basically said that at 40, 50, 60, 70 years stuff happens and it is not consistent. Not being able to search, I cannot even quote myself.

At mid 40s, we realize that our basketball games get a little shorter; stamina, don't you know? And perimenopause, which is different for each of us..

At 50, our stamina decreases, hair is graying (unless you are related to me: then it just thins). For women, it is pretty obvious no more babies and a major change in some attitudes. And ooooh, we are almost 60!

At 60, the joints get more painful and the muscles weaken, but it's still doable. Memory isn't quite so sharp, but the theory is that we have so much stuff there that we have to sift through to get what we want. I think 2 days is a little long, but...whatever. We have both been happy with modern medicine: my back, his eyes, his knee, various pills for blood pressure, cholesterol, asthma, pain.

At 70, Lucas and I are just arriving. Scared crapless, but still enjoying what we have.

Yes. Over the Hill. But downhill is easier going, sometimes. 

So, how y'all doing? How do you feel about that?

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Re: How do we feel about getting older?
« Reply #1 on: October 04, 2013, 10:49:18 PM »
I'm waiting for the day my hair is primarily grey.  I will stop coloring it at that point.  I don't mind grey hair, but I refuse to have mouse brown hair.  :P

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Re: How do we feel about getting older?
« Reply #2 on: October 04, 2013, 11:00:38 PM »
I'm waiting for the day my hair is primarily grey.  I will stop coloring it at that point.  I don't mind grey hair, but I refuse to have mouse brown hair.  :P

Mine has been mouse brown with red highlights all my life, so I'm good with it. My grandmother died at 96 with strawberry blond hair that started out as auburn, Mom died at 55  :-[ with just a few streaks of gray. I'm 68 with even less gray than my mom, but it is thinning. Not embarrassing yet, but who knows?


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Re: How do we feel about getting older?
« Reply #3 on: October 04, 2013, 11:16:29 PM »
I just started working this week at a senior residence and deal with the residents daily.  They range from 60's-102.  I also just helped take care of my dad, who was 81 when he passed in August and am now helping take care of step mom who is 78.  There are some universal truths..eyesight dims, hearing gets a bit off, skin wrinkles, but I personally think it is all attitude and how you live your life.  My dad, even ill was always active and his mind was perfect up to the day he died.  My step mom, once she retired, really didn't have any outside hobbies and her mind is slipping.  The residents I have met this week are all so nice, but the ones that take advantage of all the activities offered..the exercise classes every morning, the outings, the game days and crafting..they are the ones that, although they may have walkers or canes are the positive upbeat ones.  The ones that only come out of their apartments to come down for a movie in the theater or for a meal in the dining room are the ones who, when you ask how their day is moan about all their aches and pains.  I am 47 and see the changes happening, but to me, it is how you approach aging and how you face the health challenges that make a world of difference.


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Re: How do we feel about getting older?
« Reply #4 on: October 05, 2013, 12:25:30 AM »
Is this the Royal We asking?   ;D

We are truly aggravated that our hair started thinning in our early 40's.  Truly!  Hair was our Great Vanity in our Youth, and it's only half as thick as it was.  This is Most Offensive to Us.
We are pleased at the pattern the grey hair has taken - lots along the front brow, only scattered speckles on the rest.  We are told It's Elegant...
We are Not Thrilled that weight has made a permanent home on our body, from stem to stern, so to speak.  It is relentless, as is Our Appetite.
We are not thrilled to have grown out of all our party clothes, AND to be heavier than we were when we entered hospital to Deliver Our Children!  >:(
We are equally Not Thrilled at the trifocals Our Eyes need these days.  Nor at the expensive lenses our weird eyes demand unless We Want half inch thick lenses.
We positively despise the wretched arthritis that has taken hold of sundry joints in hand and foot, and pretty much everywhere below the waist (oddly enough, it doesn't seem to be a problem above the waist).  We worry when the need to up the pain meds will mean OTC ibuprofen will no longer do the job.
We are not thrilled that ageism Does In Fact make it harder to get a job, regardless of skills.

We are pleased, however, to discover that many of the things that upset and distress our much younger co-workers don't bother us all that much, because YES WE HAVE seen it before, and we rode it out then too.

Still ticking at 58!   8)
Double MIL now; not yet a Grandma.  Owner of Lard Butt Noelle, kitteh extraordinaire!


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Re: How do we feel about getting older?
« Reply #5 on: October 05, 2013, 02:27:35 AM »
Excited. I feel excited.
)'( The world would rather hug you than hurt you )'(


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Re: How do we feel about getting older?
« Reply #6 on: October 05, 2013, 06:51:15 AM »
Love your work, Minmom3!

At 47, I feel pretty happy with my life.  I've never been especially conventional, but neither am I outrageously unconventional - simply me. 

I've had various injuries over the years, so have had to modify some activities from age 32 - no more tractor driving, no more throwing sheep around. Mustering cattle by trail bike was no longer possible, so I used a 4WD instead. 

That said, I can still ride road bikes.  Still do bike rallies.  Have been lucky enough to have time and ability to:  drive a tank, skydive, do gentle rock-climbing (not the extreme stuff), have various adventures, do further study and generally enjoy my career. 

I find I gain weight more easily, and my "lucky" metabolism cannot be counted on so much now.  My skin is now very dry and wrinkling.  My hair is still coppery-brown, but with silver sprinkled through (mainly hidden, luckily).  I have "achieved" early menopause with no real symptoms!  I most definitely look older than my age - Irish skin in the Aussie climate doesn't age gracefully at all.  But my eyesight and hearing is still acute as ever.  (Hopefully Dad's good genes will keep that going for me until 60-ish, as it did for him.)

I'm not as agile as I once was.  Running will not ever happen again (repeated stress fractures to both feet).  I have lost the desire to party all night, though I still keep late hours and find I can still function well with around 5 hours sleep a night.  I am becoming more set in my ways! 

All in all, I'm pretty happy with getting older.  I'm no longer pushed to have children, and people now seem more accepting of the decision to be childfree, which is nice.  I find with age, that other women are easier to get on with, and the differences between me and "normal" women don't form the barriers they once did.

Hoping that life continues to be kind as the years go on.  :)
Look out... 
It's one of the Aussie Contingent!


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Re: How do we feel about getting older?
« Reply #7 on: October 05, 2013, 09:07:07 AM »
At 66 I'm quite happy. 

I move a little more slowly, no more running to beat the traffic lights, but I have no aches and pains in my joints. I think having to climb 40 steps from the ground to our apartment has something to do with that.

Eyes are no worse than they ever were and hearing is good. 

Hair is as thick as ever and, since it was always ash brown, the gray I have doesn't show much. 

I can't eat as much as I used to but there's no harm in that. 

Mind is still pretty decent but, just to be safe, I make more lists. 

Getting old doesn't have to be depressing.  MIL is in her mid-nineties.  She cut our weekly phone call short today because she had a reservation to play WII tennis. 


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Re: How do we feel about getting older?
« Reply #8 on: October 05, 2013, 09:24:26 AM »
Well, it's better than the alternative... ;)

I turned 50 this year. Covering up the grey and started buying wrinkle cream other than that life goes on.


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Re: How do we feel about getting older?
« Reply #9 on: October 05, 2013, 09:26:32 AM »
My biggest concern about getting old is that a day will come when I will be too old to care for my pets.  I just don't know what I'll do if I can't be surrounded by animals.

The biggest plus about getting old for me will be fitting in with my sleep schedule.  I like to wake up at 5am and go to bed around 9 if I can  manage it.  It will be nice not to feel the odd man out for a change.


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Re: How do we feel about getting older?
« Reply #10 on: October 05, 2013, 09:50:54 AM »
Also, we must remember that 'old' is in the eye of the beholder.

My mother gave birth to me when she was in her mid-thirties.  At the time, she was considered an 'elderly prima para'. 

I once worked with a guy who was a real club kid. After partying all night, he would come to work with his eyes in backwards.  At lunch one day, he asked me an important question.  'Thipu, you're an older woman.  Tell me.  When do you stop wanting to have fun?'

At the time, I was in my late twenties. 


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Re: How do we feel about getting older?
« Reply #11 on: October 05, 2013, 10:02:37 AM »
My views on aging are modeled after my mother.  She was only 5 feet tall and a large woman.  She grayed early starting with a white streak in front when she was only 30.  She had very pale dry skin so she also wrinkled a bit earlier.  Her attitude about it all?  She held her head up high and lived with confidence!  She knew who she was and was completely comfortable with it.

She laughed her way through life.  One of the physical traits that I remember most about her was all of the laugh lines surrounding her sparkling blue eyes.  I always thought it was so beautiful to have the proof of a happy life etched on your face for all to see.  Various aging issues came up and she'd just chuckle about it.

I've always had some of my mother's attitude about life but as I've aged, it's becoming stronger.  I'm starting to get gray hair (I'm in my late 40's) and I wear it with confidence.  That's my "sparklies".  I don't care how young I look because I'm not young.  I'm perfectly okay with that.

My DH is 5 years older than me so we are going through this together.  We tease each other and laugh about printing becoming smaller, the dryer shrinking our clothes, needing stronger glasses, or not being able to get up off the floor so easily.  Yeah, we're aging and that's just fine with us!  We've had health issues but when we can we just take it in stride. 


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Re: How do we feel about getting older?
« Reply #12 on: October 05, 2013, 10:45:51 AM »
Getting older is certainly an adventure. I turned 59 in July. I only have 3more months until I can close out the 401K that those financial advisors said in the 1990's would earn lots of money for my retirement. (Ha! I'm lucky that the stock market improved enough that my $800 401K earned back what it lost.)

The one thing I didn't expect was the growth of chin hairs.

When DH and I are playing with our Kindles, he wears eyeglasses and I take mine off.

Inside I feel about 20 years old, minus the depression (thank you, Venlafaxine!) but I have assorted aches and pains aggravated due to me putting on weight over the years.

I started out life with light ash blonde hair, as I got older, it got darker. In my 40's, one little section of hair on the side of my head came in silver grey. I thought that was cool! Then after menopause, my hair got to be salt and pepper. So for the past couple of years, I've been getting it highlighted, and it's got a golden tones in it.

When I turned 30, I said that I could never again being accused of being "just a kid in her '20's. What does she know?"

I love being Gramma to 5 cute little kids. I love being the cheerleader and "the backup singer" for the parents of my grandkids. My DD's and their DH's are fantastic parents!

I'm using my GrammaH's go-to form of child discipline - sitting on the time-out chair. ( I hated it when I was a kid because I didn't want to sit, I wanted to continue to get into it with my brother.) "Sitting down and sitting still" still works as an effective child disciplining tool! It's one I've seen Jo 'SuperNanny' use.


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Re: How do we feel about getting older?
« Reply #13 on: October 05, 2013, 04:23:01 PM »
I turned 50 in January, and can't believe it.  I don't feel much different physically than I did in my 20's.

Aside from some power surges, and a touch of arthritis in my knees, I'm doing well.  Too heavy, but I'm working on that.

40 was more of a benchmark to me.  Something clicked, and I realized I didn't need anyone else's approval.  I've only gotten more independent from approval-seeking since then.   I notice that many women's magazines geared towards 20 and 30 year olds are all about what "your man" thinks, and by the time you're reading More, it's all about you! 

I realize life is short(er), and so I'm not afraid to do things because I might fail.

This is attributed to Andy Rooney:  Not politically correct, but still funny.  I like the first one: Women over 40 won't wake you in the middle of the night to ask "What are you thinking?"  They don't care what you think.  ;D (well, maybe not that harsh).


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Re: How do we feel about getting older?
« Reply #14 on: October 05, 2013, 06:18:49 PM »
I feel that age is a state of mind.  I've known people in their 20's that acted like they were in their 60's, and people in their 70's that act like they're 20.  I know who I would rather be!   ;D

I'm 51.  I do more now than when I was in my 20's and 30's.  Apart from the grey hair, a couple of arthritic joints and needing glasses, I don't feel old.  I've been told I don't look my age, and I certainly don't act it.  And being nearly totally grey is a really good excuse for being a blondie in my old age.  It's easier to lighten what's left than darken the majority.

I still work full time.  I'm still slowly renovating my old house.  I still take my bike out for rides, and keep up with the young'ns.  I still roll around on the floor play-wrestling with the dogs, although it's a little harder to get up now.

Menopause isn't fun, but it will end.  And with it, hopefully, the decades of monthly migraines.  I'm happy to have that part of my life over, even at the cost of anti-depressants to deal with the mood changes.  It sure as heck beats the migraines. 

Weight - well, I've always been heavy, at least in cycles.  I'm lighter now than I've been in 10 years, and still working on it.  So far I've kept the familial Type II diabetes at bay, but the blood pressure is high. Meh, I could do worse.

All in all, I'm enjoying the positives of aging, and treating the negative as they arrive, and trying not to let them stop me doing what I want.  I'm looking forward to retirement - there are so many things I want to try, such as pottery, stained glass making, etc that I don't have time for now.  I want to potter around in my garden, with no rush.  I want to travel more. 

Live, laugh, enjoy.  We're only here once.

Out on the patio we'd sit,
And the humidity we'd breathe,
We'd watch the lightning crack over canefields
Laugh and think, this is Australia.

Ganggajang - Sounds Of Then (This Is Australia)