Author Topic: Field Trip drivers  (Read 11205 times)

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Poppea

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Re: Field Trip drivers
« Reply #30 on: October 08, 2013, 07:36:47 PM »
I think she would have known when they left the field trip for the school that she would be running late and that was the time for her to speak up and let the school staff know about her problem.  Once she left with the child, she should have followed through and instead called her own kids' school to tell them she was running late for pickup.

It wouldn't surprise me if the driver had done just that - she may have told the teacher that she needed to pick up her other kids. 

I think that the OP should talk to the teacher if that would make her feel better.  However, if you complain about volunteers you should be prepared to step up to the plate and volunteer yourself. 

Sharnita

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Re: Field Trip drivers
« Reply #31 on: October 08, 2013, 07:39:10 PM »
It sounds like the area has sketchy cell coverage, though. Cell phones don't do any good when there is a problem with coverage.

Marbles

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Re: Field Trip drivers
« Reply #32 on: October 08, 2013, 07:40:08 PM »
She didn't stop for gas or let a kid use the restroom. She broke the rules and took a child who wasn't hers on a personal errand. She should not have volunteered if her timeline didn't allow for the trip.
We don't know how much the OP volunteers and that is irrelevant to the situation.
She should not be allowed to do field trips anymore and the drivers should have to read and sign the rules before driving.

If you are not an employee of the school, you would not be performing "personal errands".

Whether or not the OP volunteers is relevent.  If a 10 minute delay is going to upset her she needs to be driving her own child.

I don't think it's relevant at all. The OP has to be able to trust that any person the school chooses to entrust her child with is going to follow the rules the school has set for the care, handling, and supervision of the kids. This parent clearly did not.

It's not just a ten minute delay.
The kids were supposed to be back at X:00; the whole group was late. Eventually, the bus and cars started rolling in over the course of some period of time (5, 10, 20 minutes? The OP doesn't specify). After all the other cars had arrived, the OP had to wait a further 10 minutes for her child.

GlitterIsMyDrug

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Re: Field Trip drivers
« Reply #33 on: October 08, 2013, 07:41:20 PM »
She didn't stop for gas or let a kid use the restroom. She broke the rules and took a child who wasn't hers on a personal errand. She should not have volunteered if her timeline didn't allow for the trip.
We don't know how much the OP volunteers and that is irrelevant to the situation.
She should not be allowed to do field trips anymore and the drivers should have to read and sign the rules before driving.

If you are not an employee of the school, you would not be performing "personal errands".

Whether or not the OP volunteers is relevent.  If a 10 minute delay is going to upset her she needs to be driving her own child.

Is she able to drive her own child? I mean, maybe OP has a job and can't take time off to drive for field trips. Maybe she has younger children at home to care for. Maybe she's in school. Maybe she doesn't drive or prefers to volunteer in the classroom.

This is a personal errand. If volunteer mom was on a tight schedule, she didn't need to volunteer. Or she could have told an employee of the school "After the field trip I need to pick up my other kids from school, so I won't be able to drive any other kids back with me", and I'm sure the school would've figured out a solution. The rules say she can't go pick up her other kids while driving other people's kids back from field trip. That's it. That's the rule. If she's 5 minutes late, or 10 minutes late, or a half hour late because of it doesn't matter. She's not allowed to do it. Period.

Remember this woman was essentially a stranger. Sure, the kids go to the same school. But that's it. What if it hadn't been picking up other kids that made her late? What if she had decided to pick up a friend from work? Or stopped at Starbucks? Is that still ok? Only 10 minutes right?

A lot can happen in 10 minutes. And more importantly, if you take my hypothetical children somewhere and they are to be back by a certain time, they are to be back by that time. If there is a delay, such as traffic, I expect notification. If everyone else got back on time, and she didn't, then what did she do that they didn't do?

Poppea

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Re: Field Trip drivers
« Reply #34 on: October 08, 2013, 07:42:21 PM »
I don't think she should have stopped to pick up her other kids without prior approval from someone at the school that could relay that message to anyone who needed to know.   I think pushing the panic button at 10 minutes late is over the top.   Everyone driving needs to have a working cell phone and a person available to contact in the event there is a change in the agreed schedule.

My children's school did not have volunteer drivers, but girls & boy scouts did.  I know if I was paniced over a 10 minute delay the other parents would have thought I was way way over the top. 

I specifically remember one cub scout outing where my son's car was the last one to arrive (by more than 10 minutes).  The boys all tumbled out of the car with the remains of their happy meals.  The food had been so bad at the outing and the mom so nice that she stopped at the drive thu and bought all the boys lunch. 

Poppea

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Re: Field Trip drivers
« Reply #35 on: October 08, 2013, 07:47:56 PM »
She didn't stop for gas or let a kid use the restroom. She broke the rules and took a child who wasn't hers on a personal errand. She should not have volunteered if her timeline didn't allow for the trip.
We don't know how much the OP volunteers and that is irrelevant to the situation.
She should not be allowed to do field trips anymore and the drivers should have to read and sign the rules before driving.

If you are not an employee of the school, you would not be performing "personal errands".

Whether or not the OP volunteers is relevent.  If a 10 minute delay is going to upset her she needs to be driving her own child.

Is she able to drive her own child? I mean, maybe OP has a job and can't take time off to drive for field trips. Maybe she has younger children at home to care for. Maybe she's in school. Maybe she doesn't drive or prefers to volunteer in the classroom.

This is a personal errand. If volunteer mom was on a tight schedule, she didn't need to volunteer. Or she could have told an employee of the school "After the field trip I need to pick up my other kids from school, so I won't be able to drive any other kids back with me", and I'm sure the school would've figured out a solution. The rules say she can't go pick up her other kids while driving other people's kids back from field trip. That's it. That's the rule. If she's 5 minutes late, or 10 minutes late, or a half hour late because of it doesn't matter. She's not allowed to do it. Period.

Remember this woman was essentially a stranger. Sure, the kids go to the same school. But that's it. What if it hadn't been picking up other kids that made her late? What if she had decided to pick up a friend from work? Or stopped at Starbucks? Is that still ok? Only 10 minutes right?

A lot can happen in 10 minutes. And more importantly, if you take my hypothetical children somewhere and they are to be back by a certain time, they are to be back by that time. If there is a delay, such as traffic, I expect notification. If everyone else got back on time, and she didn't, then what did she do that they didn't do?

Seriously?  First if you read the OP this is her youngest child, so no younger children at home.  You'd expect at phone call for a traffic delay?  So you want the driver to use a cell phone while driving?

What if she had picked up a friend from work?  Okay.  What if she had stopped to sell crack?  Or sell stolen hubcaps?  She didn't do any of that so whats the point?

The school has a practice of using volunteer drivers.  The OP can complain about the volunteer, she can drive her own son or she can try to get the field trips ended.   Choices one and three will make her unpopular with the other parents. 

citadelle

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Re: Field Trip drivers
« Reply #36 on: October 08, 2013, 07:51:37 PM »
I don't think she should have stopped to pick up her other kids without prior approval from someone at the school that could relay that message to anyone who needed to know.   I think pushing the panic button at 10 minutes late is over the top.   Everyone driving needs to have a working cell phone and a person available to contact in the event there is a change in the agreed schedule.

My children's school did not have volunteer drivers, but girls & boy scouts did.  I know if I was paniced over a 10 minute delay the other parents would have thought I was way way over the top. 

I specifically remember one cub scout outing where my son's car was the last one to arrive (by more than 10 minutes).  The boys all tumbled out of the car with the remains of their happy meals.  The food had been so bad at the outing and the mom so nice that she stopped at the drive thu and bought all the boys lunch.

That's terrible! How did she know they were allowed to eat McDonald's? /sarcasm

TootsNYC

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Re: Field Trip drivers
« Reply #37 on: October 08, 2013, 07:52:38 PM »
The hour-long delay was not the other mother's fault.

The *extra* 10 minutes was.

I think I'd have been OK with waiting that 10 mins. (if it was really just 10 mins.), because in my neck of the woods, you can simply be behind a slowish driver and end up that late.

Of course, the OP was in a much more worried state because she waited the hour with no info.

I also was much less worried in general. I tended to trust the grownups who had my kids; I wasn't very imaginative about what could happen.

If it would make the OP feel better, I think she could definitely ask the teacher or director about the incident and ask what they thought would be the future plan for such a situation.

Sharnita

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Re: Field Trip drivers
« Reply #38 on: October 08, 2013, 07:55:32 PM »
If the field trip really was a whole hour longer than it should have been then the driver really had no way of knowing it would run into her pickup time for the other kids.

Deetee

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Re: Field Trip drivers
« Reply #39 on: October 08, 2013, 08:03:57 PM »

Quote
I have some sympathy because I can see how the mom may have had a time frame in mind

3:00: Leave pumpkin patch
3:30 :Arrive Preschool and drop off kid
3:40 :Go to Elementary and pick up older kids

Then there is a delay leaving the pumpkin patch and she may not have noticed or may have noticed and thought she still had time to go to the preschool and then the older kids school.

Then she gets in the car and realises that there is no way she will be able to get to elementary school in time if she goes to the preschool first. So she tries to call and can't so fetches her children.

I mean I know that I often get in the car (with young children) and realise that it 10 or 15 minutes later than it should be because the time evaporates.

I wouldn't see it as a big deal if my kid arrived later in a convey.

Sorry, your bad time mangagement skills are your problem alone and should not impact other parents.

If everyone else has arrived and no one has been told where you went, other parents of your children are rightfully worried about their children.

In this case, it could very likely not be the mom's poor time management skills. It was the preschool's time management. She thought they were leaving at a specific time. Because everything was delayed, she didn't get to leave a certain time and likely couldn't make it to her other kids.

If the woman had stopped to go grocery shopping or drop of dry cleaning, I'd be jumping on the unacceptable train with everyone else.

But the woman left a message and picked up her kids (which has a time limited window) and delivered the child safely 10 minutes later.

I agree with previous posters that it would be best for someone who had that little tolerance for such a stop to drive herself in the future.

If faced with picking your kids up up at principal's office after school  and worrying them or dropping the kid off late and worrying the mom, I think that she made the right choice.

[and all this reminds me that I need to send in my drivers volunteer for my kids field trip to a pumpkin patch. ]

camlan

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Re: Field Trip drivers
« Reply #40 on: October 08, 2013, 08:07:26 PM »
The OP does not give the amount of time the main group was late, or the amount of time the car her son was in was late. The hour and the 10 minutes are guesses by other posters.

To answer the question the OP asked, what would you say to the other mother, my answer would be--nothing.

Take up the matter with the school administration. Let them know you were unhappy with what happened. Maybe it's time to stop using volunteer parent drivers and to hire two buses instead of one.
Nothing is impossible, the word itself says, “I’m possible!” –Audrey Hepburn


Sharnita

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Re: Field Trip drivers
« Reply #41 on: October 08, 2013, 08:10:19 PM »
Actually, she did say her child's vehicle was 10 minutes beyond the last. And there was no bus, there was a school van.

Peregrine

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Re: Field Trip drivers
« Reply #42 on: October 08, 2013, 08:20:43 PM »
Mother to a pre-schooler going on his first field trip on Friday.

I say nothing to the other mother.   I ask the director to investigate the incident fully.  I state that on future field trips that my son is not be driven by this mother if they continue to allow her to drive.

I really think this is all you can politely do in this particular situation.  I also believe that if you aren't willing or able to volunteer your time for field trips you can't be surprised or upset if they no longer happen. 

perpetua

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Re: Field Trip drivers
« Reply #43 on: October 08, 2013, 08:21:34 PM »
I don't know what this woman was supposed to do. The field trip ran late, which presumably made her late for picking up her own kids, for which there can be penalties, or safety issues. So she has the choice to either stop and get them on the way, which it sounds like she did, or drive the school kids back, drop them off, then go back for her kids, making her possibly 20 minutes later in the other direction to get her own kids. Depending on how old they are could be stuck in the principal's office with some overzealous teacher calling the authorities because their parent hasn't picked them up (no cell phone coverage, so the mum couldn't be called herself to find out where she was) or, if they're older, may have been waiting outside the school gates on their own. I think she did the best she could in a difficult situation.

I agree with those who say if the OP wants that much control over a few minutes, she should drive the kids herself.

Please pass the Calgon

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Re: Field Trip drivers
« Reply #44 on: October 08, 2013, 08:23:50 PM »
Preschools don't usually have busses.
The school van then, which she did say they have.