Unless you were kidnapped and dragged into the wedding you weren't a captive audience. You volunteered to be there.
If I go to a poetry reading I might hear something that offends/bores/upsets me but I am not a captive audience - I went to the poetry reading.
That`s true, I wasn`t tied down, but from an etiquette perspective, I feel a lot more comfortable walking out of a poetry reading than I do a friend`s wedding. Often at a wedding you`d have to pass by rows of people in the pews, causing a bit of a scene. I don`t think it would be very kind to my friends to do that, and I`m sure the officiants who want to make their moral statements are quite aware of how the audience feels stuck, and they take advantage of that.
Just look at some of the stories in this thread, about brides and grooms who were caught off-guard by their officiants! If they weren`t even comfortable walking out, the same is likely true of their guests.
Well, I have been known to make the remark that it was a good thing that my wedding didn't include "whatever." And, if it were about only heterosexuals getting married, I would stand up and leave. I also don't do services that denigrate other religions. I walk out. I try to be discreet, but I walk out.
I think that`s a really principaled stance. I mean that as a total compliment, no sarcasm at all. I wish I were that brave. I wonder if next wedding I go to that`s religious, I should try to deliberately sit somewhere on an aisle near the back to make it easier. My main concern in the past has been about disturbing other people and causing a scene, so that might make a difference.
I definitely don`t feel comfortable sitting there and tacitly accepting views that are offensive to me, unfortunately.
I guess I think of how I would want my wedding guests to act if something about the event really rubbed them the wrong way.
That`s a good way of wrapping my mind around it. I would definitely have no problem if someone felt uncomfortable at my event and preferred to remove themselves, so I should probably give my friends the same courtesy of assuming that they`re equally understanding.