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50 People on "The Most Intellectual Joke I Know"

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cwm:
I'm going to have to share this with BF tonight. I know he'll get a kick out of some of the worse ones, and I can add a lot more to the "Bad Jokes" file on my computer at home.

MommyPenguin:
My husband *loves* this kind of joke.  His favorite is, There was a young lady named Bright/Whose speed was much faster than light;/She set out one day,/In a relative way/And returned on the previous night.

This is my favorite joke of this type:

Heisenberg and Schrödinger are driving, and get pulled over. Heisenberg is in the driver's seat, the officer asks "do you know how fast you were going?" Heisenberg replies, "No, but I know exactly where I am!" The officer looks at him confused and says "you were going 108 miles per hour!" Heisenberg throws his arms up and cries, "Great! Now I'm lost!"

The officer, now more confused and frustrated orders the men outside of the car, and proceeds to inspect the vehicle. He opens the trunk and yells at the two men, "Hey! Did you guys know you have a dead cat back here?" Schrödinger angrily yells back, "We do now, jerk!"

Slartibartfast:
MommyPenguin, I'm dying laughing here  ;D

whiskeytangofoxtrot:
There are 10 kinds of people in the world- those who understand binary, and those who don't.

Pen^2:
Why didn't Karl Marx drink earl grey?

Because all proper tea is theft :P

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