I am wondering what happened the next day? Did you have more clear cut communications? Set an actual leave time? Basically - did you guys work this out?
That was really the only day that we had an issue like this, and I think both sides were probably a bit more flexible after that. But what is interesting is that a few weeks later this got brought up, which is really what compelled me to see what people here thought.
Basically, at a party, a few of the people from the holiday made a joke about Alice needing to get ready first before we did something at the party (I would not call this rude in and of itself, as we are all very
close friends). Alice, who sensed that we might have made this joke before (which we had a couple of times), then responded that she had been "100% in the right".
She basically said that she had been told a time to get ready by, met that time, but was accused of being late because we all just decided to leave once we were ready. When someone asked her if she had noticed other people getting ready, she said "yes, but presumably you would have had a shower and got dressed even if we weren't going anywhere. I thought that's what you were doing." She also said that if we'd told her that we were going ASAP, she wouldn't have made the decision to watch TV, but that we didn't say that.
That's why I do have a lot of sympathy for her in this situation. Like I said, I thought the plan was to leave at 12. I think that Bob meant "when everyone's ready" in hindsight, but I didn't infer that at the time. I thought Alice was a bit off for just sitting there watching TV while everyone else was getting ready, but from her claimed point of view, she was enjoying a TV show, safe in the knowledge that she had plenty of time at the end, and all of a sudden people were suggesting we leave right away.
There may have been some passive aggressiveness on her part, as I suspect that she may have suspected that we might want to leave when the show was over and she didn't tell us that she wouldn't be able to meet that timetable. Once other people had started watching as well, I can see why she wouldn't really want to get up halfway through. My guess is that she didn't want to ask outright and risk missing the end of the show if we said that we wanted to leave ASAP. But, that's only a suspicion on my part, and it may well be that she thought she had time - and this is certainly what her defence was.
To answer an earlier question, there were three bathrooms and five bedrooms, so while we couldn't all get ready simultaneously, there was more than enough time and space for us to get ready in an hour and a half.